9 yr old told off for calling non-binary teacher Sir

[Nowherecitizen]

My friend’s son was told off by a teacher at his school for referring to them as ‘Sir’. The teacher is male but identifies as non-binary.

Their title is Mx which the children are aware of. But the little boy simply looked at an adult who is visibly male and used the term Sir.

I have seen this teacher and they are 'masculine' looking but will sometimes wear a skirt and heels.

Friend’s DS felt bad and can’t recall exactly what was said to them but said the teacher was ‘very cross’.

AIBU to think this was mishandled? Surely the child should be reminded gently of the preferred identity of this adult but should not face a telling off?

What is the non-binary version of Sir anyway?

Amen

The teacher should be told to get a grip and stop their ridiculous attention seeking.

In the '70s, my English teacher informed us that he hated being called 'Sir' and we should just call him 'Mr [Surname]' at all times.

That's been the custom in one school where I worked full time - the children used the full title and name at all times. In one other, the children used 'Teacher!'. it In all the other schools, it was 'Miss' for all women.

The one time that I came across the situation where a teacher wanted to be 'Mx', the kids coped with the 'Mx' - it was the pronouns that defeated them. However, the male teachers there were all 'Sir', so I've not idea what happened when they were trying to catch the attention of the N-B teacher. As I've said in a previous post, he eventually went off with stress after repeated 'misgendering'.

Even the school electronic register couldn't cope. When I had to search for his register, the available titles were "Dr, Miss, Mr, Mrs, Ms, Prof." He was down as "Other".

Absolutely Amen

It does make a difference. I’d be concerned if my child was unable to remember a teachers name or title.

So let the OP answer the question. Facts matter.

So 'Mx' in this case.
But he's a man.
Even if the child takes on that this is the 'correct' title for this person, as much as a 9-year-old (and a 9-year-old who is presumably concentrating on their maths or geography or whatever) can take it on, they will still say 'sir' at least some of the time going forward. As would I, and I'm 50. Because seeing something and saying something contra is really hard. Like that thing where you read a list of words for colours written in another colour, and you almost invariably say 'yellow' when the word is yellow even when the colour is blue.

This is unwarranted mental strain, and compelled speech.

I don’t think I have side stepped the point at all - and I don’t think white that identify as African American or able bodied people who identify as disabled are compatible arguments in my opinion.

Nobody ever seems to be able to explain why these things aren't 'compatible arguments'.

I am 53, not 14. I am white, not black or brown. I am female, not male. I am not disabled. Also, I am a human, not an antelope. All of those things are facts. If anything, race is more on a spectrum than the others, since people can obviously be of mixed race. But 'identifying as' a different age or species makes no less sense than 'identifying as' a different sex.

There is no difference but I’m all ears waiting for their response.

I'm also very interested in the answer to this.

I've been asking for a long time, but no one ever seems to be able to describe why it's different

I've not renewed my subscription to the GTCS - a requirement for teaching in Scotland. I'm getting too old for it.

It's like treading on eggshells these days. I had an S3/Y10 boy castigating me for saying "Ladies and gentlemen - you may go."

"That's sexist! You can't say that - there might be someone in here who doesn't identify as male or female."

I pointed out that I'd checked the register and everyone in the room was listed as either male or female.

Well most teacher gave been called sir miss mum dad at some point so as a one off you would not expect a "telling off"

So it is possible that this is deliberate way to try and antagonise the teacher either by this pupil or a group of pupils taking turns to call him sir, knowing that is not his preference

Another possibility is that he was told "do not refer to me as sir but as "x" thank you "but with a firm tone which the child regards as a "telling off"

You'd be concerned? Really?

I had secondary school pupils who were still calling me "Miss Weary" instead of "Mrs Weary" after I'd been teaching them for 3 months. It happens - particularly in a school where the vast majority of female teachers are "Miss".

It’s entirely your business if benefit from children being unable to remember things but as a parent I’d be concerned.

I couldn’t eloquently put it - so I hope you don’t mind I have posted the link- www.bostonreview.net/articles/robin-dembroff-dee-payton-breaking-analogy-between-race-and-gender/

I'll read the link now, but I'm curious as to why, if you agree with it, you can't use your own words to express that?

Now I know that you're being ridiculous for the sake of it.

If this is true, then - poor, poor children. What an utterly baffling world we are presenting them with. They must be so confused.

Adults who've constructed all this complexity should at the very least be understanding and patient with them. How on earth can primary school children who haven't yet reached puberty be expected to understand gender politics?

The world truly has gone mad.

This is why I said that I don’t believe that the child should be disciplined. But honestly they are 9 - it’s not unwarranted mental strain or compelled speach in my opinion. They are still learning and developing.

there must be a hidden agenda because the teacher is non-binary.

You say this like it’s perfectly acceptable for a male teacher to tell his students that he is not really male but something else.

Trans ideology is not harmless fun with names, it is a sinister ideology that teaches children that in order to be happy if they don’t like the objects (clothes, toys etc) designated for their sex, they may have been born in the wrong body and face a lifetime of surgical interventions or suicide.

Everything has gone too far now , if this is true I would be furious with the school. People like that should not be teaching IMHO!

Because it’s a complex and nuance issue that needs a lot of typing and this way is easier! 🙂

Love it. This is all getting out of hand. Aren’t some kids turning up at schools identifying as cats? If this is all allowed to carry on society will implode

it’s not unwarranted mental strain or compelled speach How is it not? Do you mean specifically because the child is nine?

They are still learning and developing. And?