Cutlery AIBU

[WhyNotUsehis]

So 'conversation' this evening as to why my DH won't set the table while I'm preparing dinner - it's basically because I'm too critical

As in when he sets the table he doesn't pay attention to the cutlery he's setting out, so you could get a
Dessert fork with a dinner knife or vice versa
Or two different types of cutlery, so a square edged knife with a rounded fork

To me, this just feels lopsided/unbalanced when I'm eating, I prefer the cutlery in each hand to be a similar size/shape- so I end up swapping my cutlery for something that feels right

Anyone else like this, or am I too fussy?

That sounds completely horrible. No meals in bedrooms. Yuk.

Different weighted cutlery does bother me slightly so I just switch it to matching for my setting.

He's a lazy arse and doesnt care enough about your feelings. It's really not that difficult to get right.

Is he one of those that gets lots of little things wrong? He's probably doing it on purpose because he knows it irritates you, as opposed to putting some thought into it because it will please you. If he does it enough times, he'll be thinking you'll stop asking.

Have you tried making his dinner with 'not quite right' ingredients or measurements? Can't be bothered to find a teaspoon to measure the chilli? Use the ladle, it's close enough. No tinned tomatoes? Just pick another can of whatever and use that, especially if it is Whiskas. No problem, it's a can isn't it?

So you swap out your own cutlery for what you prefer and he thinks that is too critical? He would hate my house then! DP would definitely get a Paddington style hard stare if he gave me one of the shit knives and forks with the straight handles. Need a curve to fit into the palm of your hand properly. And he bought the straight ones, so I can't be blamed for them being in the house.

As someone who often eats with odd cutlery, I don’t understand where you’re coming from.

Let’s give the OP some inspiration with photos of our nicely organised cutlery drawers…

So to answer some questions/suggestions
I have a large compartment cutlery drawer, but all the knives would be together in one section, all the forks in another etc etc

By far the majority are one type of cutlery, so I think I'm going to have to dump the smaller set

Dessert knives/forks not so easy, as we use them often enough for starters and he says it's too much hassle to check which ones are the bigger ones and which are the smaller 😏

We have different sized knives and forks. My hubby knows he has large and I have small. He even knows that we use different knives (steak) or add a spoon is its a sauce and pasta.
Your hubby has a training need - keep practicing until he gets it right.

We don’t own dessert forks, if we did they would be in a separate section of the cutlery drawer.
I don’t like miss matched cutlery either so only have one type/design.

You could sort your cutlery and drawer out to easily resolve this issue.

I am bemused by this thread. There's an actual butter knife? And desert forks?

It all sounds a bit Downton Abbey to me 😂

We have one set of cutlery, with knives, forks, desert spoons and teaspoons. They all work perfectly, in that they get the food from plate to mouth without issue.

(We do have a RIDICULOUS amount of odd teaspoons though. No idea where they've come from.)

Your poor dh, you sound annoying and you should do it yourself then

A simple Google search will show you that they're different shapes and sizes - a butter knife in particular is very different to a table knife.

I keep my dessert forks in a jam jar next to where the cake is kept.

DH and I have 2 different fork styles. He likes one, I prefer the other. As a courtesy we stick to that when laying the table.

So no, I don’t think YABU.

Christ you sound hard I'd probably stab you with a bloody fork! Who cares 🤷 hell I'd do it on purpose 😂

No, you are not wrong. There is a certain way to set the table correctly. I was fairly shocked to see a couple of TV programmes recently, where someone was actually laying a table incorrectly.
And don't get me started on tables laid by hotel staff, who really should know better or, at least, have been trained.

We just have forks, knives and then steak knives. I couldn’t get bothered about this at all.

I could not deal with all that faffing give me any fork and let me eat.
I dont own any fancy cutlery i have 4 mix forks 4 knives and about 5 mixed spoons 2 sets of chop sticks.

I am v fussy about my cutlery. And crockery. But if DH puts the "wrong" ones out for me we just have a laugh about it & I fetch the ones I want.

That's where my blasted teaspoons are 🤬

First world problems and doubling down by actually writing this out. Someone has far too much time on their hands.

You'll be lucky finding any cutlery at all made entirely in Sheffield. We live very close to Sheffield and couldn't find any that wasn't prohibitively expensive.

Just sort your cutlery draw out - have only one pattern in there !

Definitely with you, OP!

It's an easy thing to get right.

This is one of the most MN threads I've ever read