To ask for things that happen on MN that you’ve never seen happen IRL

[JandamiHash]

I’ve never seen or heard a parent refer to their child as “sexy”

I’ve never seen anyone having a nap on a public bench.

I’ve never seen someone cajole their daughter into the aisle at a wedding so they can be a stealth bridesmaid

All the above is what I’ve read about on MN recently that people do and have seen before done, regularly.

Things I don’t see and I’m all over cities and towns working with people:

Age gap relationships and marriages
The plethora of women who are size 8. Average definitely 16 as the stats say
People judging SAHMS
Parents putting strict limits on screen time
Parents restricting junk food and only serving really healthy stuff
Women being invisible as they get older.. I see them become more visible and a part of the community

On MN everyone has a dog hatred/phobia/allergy.

In the real world people adore dogs for the most part. I’m in hospital ATM and when the dogs come in, (guide dog owned by one partner, and now therapy dogs) the patients are clammering to see/stroke them.

Never met anyone who has been screamed at by MIL/SIL etc.

Never met anyone who begrudges their MIL’s very existence.

And all this going NC with family over wanting to let the baby watch television or give them snacks….

DH’s who are seemingly incapable of/unwilling to be jointly responsible for running the home or raising their children.

Life admin - never heard of it in RL - it’s just things we do without thinking about it.

I really haven’t and I’m not especially talking about homeless people - there was a thread a while ago where a poster was annoyed because noisy children nearby were disturbing her bench nap. Apparently it’s the norm to just have a snooze in public, and people expect the right to have quiet. Never seen it IRL!

Oh god yes. Every time there's a SAHM thread, you'll get endless posts stating one of the reasons they can't go to work is " WHO WILL DO ALL LIFE ADMIN" which apparently takes hours each week to do and they have husbands who are completely incapable of this ardous task or in fact any household task without a detailed spreadsheet of the time it takes a women to complete these tasks.

But there's never any mention as to what these mystery life admin tasks are whereas in the real life most of us pay bills direct debit and can book appointments within 5 mins on our lunchbreak.

I also forgot to add nurseries. People seem to think on here nurseries are some awful victorian institutions where abuse and neglect are rife where there are hoards of psychologically damaged children with attachment issues. And there will all be numerous posters claiming they've worked in nurseries and will never put their children in them.

Whereas in real life, myself and every other working mum uses them without issue. Our kids are happy and well adjusted. I've known many people who work in nurseries who put their kids in them and people ranging from doctors to social workers who have vested interest in attachment and child development also use nurseries. And the kids I know that are now in their teens having been to nursery are well adjusted normal teens with no differences to those that had SAHMs.

How could I forget, went to school and dropped off and picked up my child said hello sometimes if it happened and not other times that is as much drama as I had

If a child drops a pencil while in sight of another parent it was a secret message to the parent of the child that was ignored 2 years ago while a jacket fell off a hook and the pencil child's parent is now judging the other parent because their father didn't invite their 3rd cousin to a BBQ last summer while their wife having their 14th child and their MIL looked shifty, clear as mud?

I have strict limits on my children’s screens, so do most parents I know. How would you possibly know without going in to everyone’s homes and discussing g it with them. You’re not going to find out walking down the high street! 😂

@BlondiePortz I so agree 😂 I can honestly say I have never had any school gate related dramas whatsoever nor have I ever felt that the 2 minute task of dropping and collecting at school gates could ever cause as much drama and bad will as so many on MN experience. 🤷‍♀️ I really don't get it.

I have also never posted nor seen anyone post anything outrageous on a school WhatsApp group. But then I've seen a recent thread on MN with mums posting about sitting a male teacher's face 😱 not something I have ever seen in my boring school WhatsApp groups about lost property/PTA collections and homework.

Sorry, I meant to quote @AffIt. @JandamiHash hope your recovery continues

My job means I’m in contact with a lot of parents and know many through various schools my kids have attended, also from talking to friends and family. I don’t doubt it happens! Just not as widespread as MN would have us believe

@NattyTurtle59 one person dies every 12 minutes in the uk from sepsis. Many others get it and thankfully survive. It is extremely common and entirely treatable but easily missed. Those of us that have experienced it or have loved one who did know how quickly things can go wrong so encourage others to ask the question of medical professionals in relevant circumstances or seek medical attention is understandable. Sepsis is more dangerous if you are older or have other health issues but anyone who has any type of infection can develop it and the symptoms are not obvious.

I have never, in real life, seen a grown woman (usually a MIL) throw themselves to the ground screaming and crying, yet it seems to happen a lot on here.

The only other place it comes up seems to be on the Dateline podcasts where it is practically mandatory.

I’m Scottish and use boak a lot. Something disgusting “gives me the boak” is a common phrase here.

I know at least 5. 2 didn’t make it. One of my friends campaigns to raise awareness of the signs and symptoms after her husband died.

I’d check the stats for sepsis, it’s quite surprising and scary. And many sepsis cases may be logged as a different cause of death too as often it’s not recognised in time.

I can't decide if you're being ironic or are a "sweet summer child," as they say on here.

I have often seen people napping on benches especially in stations

And people will talk more about the extra ordinary

I can’t tell either..
There are probably more fake posts than real. Of course people lie. There are a lot of fantasists, mentally ill people, creative writers, people paid to get traction on forums etc

I must say I don't know anyone in real life who charges their young adult kids rent for living at home. This seems very common on MN, but I have never come across it in real life.

It's fairly normal here but then I live in a very high poverty area.

Lots of parents simply couldn't afford to feed and clothe more adults so it makes sense, at least until they can afford to move out.

I'm quoting this again as forgot to say I also agree with the first point. So many women on here seem married to men who the minute they have a "big job" become completely incapable of any childcare or household task.

There was a thread last week where the OP was a stay at home mum with school age kids and her husband had made a reasonable request that she get a job to help with household finances.

There wasn't any suggestion anywhere that the OPs husband didn't contribute towards childcare or household tasks but some posters became absolutely hysterical at the thought of the OP going back to work, that she needed to make a detailed spreadsheet of all the tasks she did, how long it took her to do and then present this to her husband. Insinuations that her husband couldn't possibly keep up his career if she went back to work as he would need to gasp help out with housework, the children would be neglected and the house would fall into some sort of derelict fleapit state as both parents would simply not be able to manage housework and work as well.

Whereas in the real life myself and my husband and most other couples I know manage to work and run a house jointly as a couple without it being some major drama or both collapsing for exhaustion. The division of labour can be solved by two adults having a simple mature conversation such as "do you want to do the kids bedtime or the hoovering" without the need for complex, detailed spreadsheets detailing the time and task.

I've done this! With a kid who was working full time, not a student. Not a full rent, either, but a contribution to food/bills. It's not at all unusual. Different if the young adult is studying, I would say.

Hen dos abroad
Expecting friends to fork out 100s/1000s on trips

People who don’t like McDonalds

Too many people class 'abusive' as anything they don't like, thereby diminishing the experiences of those genuinely abused.

I'm just here to say that I have seen a stunt pineapple in the wild - on/behind a fruit platter when some bigwigs visited DD1's school.

My Mum survived sepsis....just! She had a cancerous tumour in her bowel- which she didn't know that she had- and it burst. Took her to the GP, who didn't like the look of her, and sent us straight to hospital. The GP rang ahead to let them know we were coming. Mum was still walking and talking. Had a scan when we got there and then she was immediately pumped full of antibiotics because she had sepsis. The surgeon said if we hadn't gone in when we did then she wouldn't have lasted 24 hours. She was extremely poorly and was in hospital for 9 weeks.
11 years later she's 89 years old and is doing brilliantly.