Noisy neighbours are pushing me to my limits

[Lucie390]

I appreciate the title sounds like I’m about the flip.. looking for some advice. I absolutely won’t be marching round there tonight but I might politely knock on their door tomorrow if feeling brave.

We moved into a new property last summer, neighbours have a garden office/bar and have been having friends over every weekend since we moved in- without fail. It’s not caused us any issue other than annoyed that sometimes cars park nearly across our driveway and we can see it lit up in garden but not caused us any stress per say or sleepless nights until now..

Every single weekend they have friends over and we can hear them until 2am, i can’t have the window open which annoys me but even with the window closed we can hear them until 2am. I am a light sleeper anyway so appreciate I might be being sensitive but even when I get up at 3am to go to the toilet their garden office is lit up till 4am most weekends.

This week has really pushed me too far as the wife of the house in question, has had her friends over and quite literally shrieked laughing and swearing until 1am on Tuesday, then Wedesnday her teenage daughter had friends over til 1am being loud in the garden and then Thursday the wife/mum has people over till 2am again which was followed by a huge bust up and the husband and wife falling out and shouting/screaming in the garden till 3am. They then left the garden room lit up and music going till 5am. I now having family staying and I can hear a garden party again and it’s literally making my blood boil. We sat out until 8am then the music started and we’ve had to come in.

My children are teens so it’s not keeping any young children awake but we have small children in the house next to us and very elderly people the other side. I’m so cross at how inconsiderate they are. What would you do ?

My husband is so placid and would rather pit earplugs in and go to sleep but I can’t do that as easily. Plus I have my parents here I feel embarrassed as the sheer volume, especially as I know with bank holiday it’ll be the same tomorrow.. what do I do ??

Noisy neighbours are HELL! Have you spoken to them?! Can you do a noise complaint??

We haven’t, as most weekend gatherings seem to end with some sort of drama I don’t feel it’s the right time. They also don't seem very approachable. I don’t think I’d feel comfortable however it’s now at a point where something has to be said.

The whole street is on a whats app chat, I’m wondering whether to put something on there like we are really struggling with the noise of parties in the street, I dunno what exactly but something to highlight the problem in a chatty /conversational way ?

The music is now pounding I really feel so stressed by it, there’s about 15 teenagers in the garden directly next to ours and the parents come in and out and are obviously drunk too so it’s going to be another long night.. I feel so stressed. Do I call the police of still going on at 2am ?? Friday night it was 3am and still going.

Thursday the wife/mum has people over till 2am again which was followed by a huge bust up and the husband and wife falling out and shouting/screaming in the garden till 3am.

^ That would have been the perfect time to call the police tbh. If they do that again call the police as that kind of altercation, with alcohol , can end up in violence. It also has an effect to calm excessive and/or late noise from them on other occasions.

Otherwise start keeping a noise diary, possibly with phone recordings, and then notify environmental health at your local council.

Start with talking to them. Be incredibly friendly and ‘understanding’ - do not make enemies of them. It will go against all your instincts, but tread lightly. Start nicely and build up. Do not trash them in the group chat or complain formally…yet.

5 years of living in hell, that ended in court; the above is what I would have done differently.

Report them to the noise team on the council every time.

Speak to them nicely face to face.

At least give them the chance to try to be more considerate. They may not realise how far the noise carries when they've all been drinking etc.

Can this be done anonymously? I don’t feel I can approach them or do anything that can come to us.

Yes, I believe so. I’ve complained a couple of times and it’s never come back to us. If they’re making that much racket it could presumably be any number of neighbours complaining. But the noise team may want to enter your home to record the level of noise audience inside - but it sounds like they wouldn’t notice if a herd of elephants came through your front door.

There are guidelines or noise regulations on the council website for reasonable hours , ours is after 11pm be quiet and don’t start noisy work until 8 am. use these as your starting point.
I also seem to live in party land and just want to sit in my garden peacefully but it appears we are outnumbered by ignorance

Sorry you're going through this but I would move.

We can’t just move and why should we !! We bought this property last summer, you can’t just move like that unfortunately. Plus we love our house and street and neighbours- just not those that are being inconsiderate.

I believe noise in the late/early hours can be considered antisocial behaviour so you could call the police. Especially if as you say they kick off. However if they're having garden parties every night, it may not be the best option as you obviously cant call every night.

If you're really not sure a conversation would be productive (or a note?), I think I'd keep a noise diary and go down the council route first. Use the police only when they're screaming and shouting.

I often wonder how these people fund their lifestyles. Don’t they have jobs in the morning to go to?

Report them to the council. Do they work? Do you and your DH work? How do you cope on so little sleep?

Totally not on, they are so inconsiderate. Making noise until 3am plus on a regular basis is really inconsiderate. They should be expecting a knock on the door after their drunken bust up. Whether they apologise and keep the noise down though remains to be seen!

Because of all the complaints I continually have been making about my next door neighbours we have noticed they're driving off on Saturday nights to party elsewhere. Obviously they're fed up of me complaining constantly....

Don't give up. Keep logging every single incident. I have had repeated conversations over the telephone with the noise complaint officers at the local authority.

Don't let these neighbours get you down. And I disagree with others - don't move house. Why should you? You hound your neighbours continually until they stop.

My neighbours have realised that they've seriously p*ssed off the wrong person...

I’d have a separate conversation just with them personally. Send a message if you don’t feel able to speak face to face. Surely they can see they are being unreasonable. 11pm should be the cut off for excess noise. You wouldn’t mind an odd party but when it’s every weekend something needs to be done.

Be friendly in your approach with these people… try your hardest to resolve this peacefully… use humour and joviality… to help.
This can turn nasty very quickly and can become even more stressful than it is now.
Good luck

Some people are so bloody entitled and oblivious to the disturbance they're causing.....either that or they don't give a toss.

This is what my local council says about noise nuisance, which includes regular parties (once image loads). Yours may be similar. It would be a process, not an immediate fix, but sometimes a light at the end of the tunnel is a relief in itself.

Thank you for your replies. It went on till 3am. I’m going to speak to another neighbour about it and see what their thoughts are also. They are the other side of them. Thanks to everything that took time to reply.

You really need to report this to the noise team, and your other neighbour should too.

First I would look at the council website to see what they say about the hours noise becomes a nuisance; then I would write down all the dates and times you can remember that have been particularly late - after midnight especially (given pub licence extensions are rarely granted beyond midnight due to risk of noise nuisance to neighbouring residential properties that’s a good place to start with noise being unreasonable); make some recordings of the noise at different times - weekdays as well as weekends - and add that to your log as evidence of the noise level. Any fights or ridiculous behaviour late at night, ring police and report it - especially if drunken teenagers or relationship disputes as they can descend into violence very quickly.

The other thing is try and find out is whether they own or rent the property - do they own there’s very little you can do but, if they rent, find contact details for the letting agents/landlord and inform them that their tenants are causing a nuisance regularly due to noisy parties and arguments; some tenancy agreements would constitute this to be antisocial behaviour and they could risk losing their home due to their behaviour.

Talking to the other neighbours is a good idea - especially if they’ve lived there a long time as they may be able to give an insight into whether this has been an issue for a long time or is it a more recent change in behaviour. Do the nice neighbours know if people complained in the past or not. This would all help with your complaint to the noise team at the council/police if there is past history of similar behaviour as they may be able to seize the equipment that is causing the noise nuisance.

This doesn't work with inconsiderate individuals, unfortunately. I know from past experience....if they were considerate they wouldn't be continually making excessive levels of noise. No amount of talking nicely will make a jot of difference.

Having been through this myself I'm anxious for you. My noisy neighbours ruined my health.

Even though they know this is unreasonable you need to tell them this stops. They will ignore you. Then go through the process with the council. You will probably be more effective if it's a number of you complaining. You could also start being noisy back when they don't want the noise. My neighbours hated anyone making any noise!

But in my experience the council were ineffective and I moved.

Speaking to other neighbours directly seems a plan. It won’t be just you that is being pissed off.