To ask what to expect at a wedding dress appointment?

[ElleBelleLou]

I have my first appointment tomorrow at a bridal shop to try some dresses on, we're planning for a May 2028 wedding.

I know there's a LOT of time before May 2028, but I don't have even a slight clue what style of dress I might like or would suit me, so I wanted this initial appointment to try different styles on and hopefully get a bit of an idea.

My mum is coming, and my Grandma - we recently lost my Grandad so my mum and I thought this would be a nice little thing to do with my Grandma and get her out.

I am nervous as I have no idea what to expect - do I just turn up, tell them I am clueless and follow their lead?! What do I wear? Should I have some kind of Pinterest board with me? (joking .... I think)

If anyone can give me a heads up as to what to expect, and anything I may need to know or do I would appreciate it. I have anxiety hence the panicking about the unknown!

Thank you in advance

What everyone else has said about underware, go with an open mind, I had an idea of what I wanted, I couldn't have ended up with anything more different if I'd tried...... it was perfect for me but so different to what I had anticipated! (My MIL came with me to every shop I visited, she did this on the condition she got to pick a dress for me to try, NOT BUY, JUST TRY, she picked the most hideous meringue you have ever seen then proceeded to giggle at my face, fell about laughing when I put it on and told me to take it off immediately 😅 - thank god there are no pictures of me in that monstrosity 🤣)

Oh, don't panic about the dress sizes, wedding dress sizes are a law unto themselves and bare no comparison to real life!

You’ll be made a fuss of and feel really beautiful ❤️.

The organiser/shop owner will ask you your preferred style and if you are intending to wear a veil, what shoes you’d prefer. They should take measurements and write this up with the other details.

Then they will get gowns out to gauge your reaction. And this will give them a better idea of what to get you to try on.

You’ll try things on with big clips on the back to pull the shape in as most dresses need altering to fit perfectly.

you’ll be able to see all sides of the dress in the many mirrors.

Some places serve fizz.

Wear undies that you’d wear on the day if possible. I’m a larger lady and I wore some Marks and Sparks tummy control pants. But any undies will do. If you are self conscious wear a light weight chemise over your undies.

The first question they asked was “what is your budget?” This completely floored us as we hadn’t discussed it. I plucked a figure out of the air as my DD looked at me like a startled hare - £500 ish? I had no idea what dresses cost. This was back in 2012. The assistant rudely (I thought) shoved a row of dresses to one side saying “well, we won’t be needing these”! DD tried on a couple of meringues but the attitude completely ruined the experience.
We then went to a shop recommended to us - it was completely different. The lady was lovely. She really took time to talk to DD to find out likes/dislikes. She then brought out a beautiful cream lace straight dress and said she thought it would suit DD. And she was absolutely right. DD looked stunning and knew immediately she had found ‘the One’!

God I wouldn’t go near a dress shop now if you aren’t getting married for 3 years! So much could change between now and then, I’d not be looking at dresses until 18 months to a year before. Otherwise you could order something now but change your mind nearer the time and be stuck with a dress you don’t like and won’t be able to sell easily.

I went on my own. my sis brought a hang with her for hers and I hated the comments etc from them my mother kept saying it doesn't have the wow factor all the time 🙄 it's not like say yes to the dress tv show. I went in they asked a few questions etc. wore no tan nor male up and had good underwear on. be prepared for the dress not to fit etc as they only stock one size. it's not about what other people think it's how you feel in it. I wanted a light dress that I could move and dance in and one I could wear a proper bra in not strapless or cups. you will pick some and the assistant will pick some. listen to their advice they know their stuff. more importantly stick to your budget you remember you have to add alterations underwear etc costs on top of it.

If you’re bigger than a size 12 be prepared for them not to have anything you can try on 😢

It might be worth giving them a ring first to see if they operate an appointment system, many do. Just tell them you don’t really know what you are looking for and they will happy to let you try on a variety of styles. You’ll soon get an idea of what you like- straps or no straps, sleeves or not, white or ivory or something else entirely, what material, lots of bling or plain and simple. If you are going to be committing to a dress this early do remember you will need to keep your weight fairly stable if you don’t want to be paying out a fortune on multiple fittings and alterations.
Make sure someone is taking photos of what you are trying on so you can look back, but there is a good chance that once you find the one you will know!
Most of all enjoy it! It’s such fun.

This wasn’t my experience but maybe depends where you go. I’m on a the larger side, and all the shops I went to had loads in sizes much bigger than me and the one I eventually chose needed bringing in inconsiderably. Made me feel quite good!

I'm envisioning something like gwen Stefani's wedding dress by john galliano

https://www.vam.ac.uk/blog/here-come-brides/in-a-state-of-undress

They can’t really afford to sell 1 out of 10 dresses even if they cost £1000, they have rent, all the bills and insurances that come with a premises, staff to pay, stock to buy

Seems way too early to go surely?

Having recently bought my dress I’m going to go against some of the advice given.

Wear makeup, you’ll likely be wearing it on your wedding day and any dress and how you feel about it might be different when you see yourself in the mirror “properly”. The dress shops are experts at getting people in and out of dresses and will not bat an eyelid at makeup.

if you feel you’ll be wearing your hair up on the day, take a clip of some sort so you can get an idea of what the dress looks like with your hair up. again, it makes a difference to how you look and ultimately feel about a dress.

If you reckon you’ll be wearing heels on the day, take a pair with you if you have something in a heel size or style you like. Trying the dresses on in heels vs bare feet or flats does change how they look. If you’re wearing flats, don’t hesitate to try with different kinds (it’s ok to take a selection with you)

if you have nude underwear wear it, white if not. And be prepared that some dresses might need your bra off, they’ll advise where this needs done and are very discreet at helping you in and out of dresses.

Many dresses won’t fit properly, but they are experts in getting it to look like it does, don’t panic, whatever size or shape you are. I’m on the larger side and was so worried about this but I’ve never felt more comfortable in a trying on situation.

Finally, as a number of others (and the shop) have said, don’t go thinking you need to buy, but equally don’t fret if you find the one either, sometimes it just happens. Whatever happens, enjoy it, it’ll be a lovely day with your mum and grandma ❤️

I echo what people have said about not being pushed into a decision. I’m a really confident person and am definitely not backward in coming forward… but I tried this dress on… I was 95% certain it was the one… but the sales assistant was so pushy and basically rushed me into making a decision. I felt a bit panicky and almost embarrassed to say that I liked it.. but wanted some time to think about it. So I signed on the dotted line and felt swept along with it all 😞
If I had my time again I probably would have ended up with the same dress… but regret not trying on a few more of different styles.. just to rule them out. It still rankles over 30 years later!
And I too thought that my mum would cry with emotion at seeing me in a wedding dress. The first dress I ever tried on was a huge princess puffball sequinned number and my mum, god rot her, actually burst out laughing when she saw me! Not the reaction I had hoped for!!

I'm 5 foot 7 and pretty sure I'll be wearing flats on the day as I don't like my height

I'm a few inches taller than you and wear heels with joy, it's great to be tall! I didn't always like being taller but now I enjoy being taller than most when I wear heels. I stand better too!

My daughter was exactly the same!
Just looking

She ended up trying many on in her size on her first look and I ended buying one there and then as she fell in love with a specific dress!

usu they will give you a bit of time to browse the dresses, then say to the consultant you would like to try different styles as you don’t know what will work for you.

do not feel pressured or obliged to choose, at the end of the appointment ask them to write down anything you liked and do try 3 or more shops. I bought from the 3rd shop I tried as they had dresses that looked great and were more reasonable (hundreds not thousands) yet they didn’t look any different really!!!

I found the whole experience really boring 😂 I knew kind of what style I wanted but wasn’t massively sure about details so I took my bridesmaids with me and we chose 6 dresses together with various styles. The bridal shop owner did give her honest opinion to which I found helpful. I tried them all on and ended up buying the one I saw online that I liked which was in the shop

Well I went with my mum and dad, my dad is brilliant with clothes so I asked him to look for some for me. I tried on the first one and loved it. Tried on some more just to be sure and then went back to the first one and got it!

I wouldn’t worry about the heels - most (if not all) shops have a little stage/platform/stool for you to stand on if needed

If you have no idea then just tell them If there is anything you really don’t like or body parts you would like to hide/emphasise, this along with maybe your size/build will enable them to have several on rails that they will try on you to narrow style down, I would suggest taking a strapless bra if you have one in case you try on a strapless as you can’t get the full look with a bra that’s not shaped correctly in the way. Good luck, remember at this stage it’s not a panic up, it’s a bit of fun, after all you have plenty of time.

I 🤔 don't go with any set ideas and try on every sort of style. My daughter thought she'd like something simple for a summer do and ended up with a 🎄 wedding and a ball gown !

Don’t buy a dress just now. 2028 is years away so the fashions might have changed by then. Just seems way way too early. But hope you have fun

Do not buy a Wedding Dress until six months before the wedding, no matter what they tell you about how this is the one
I ended up with three wedding dresses because there’s a lot of ones out there and available and they keep updating them

Wear decent underwear. I hadn’t appreciated that they will be in the changing room with you helping you in and out of dresses and wore an embarrassingly crap pair of knickers - I mean I generally go for comfort over lacy sexy knickers but they were cotton briefs and I could have put a nicer pair on - at least I’d shaved my legs 🤣