Would you tell a child off / tell them not to say ‘ oh god ‘ or ‘ jeez ‘?

[haveyubin]

is this like swearing ?

I think my DD said Jeez once in front her aunty, who told her not to say it. She’s 5.

on my way home tonight I said ‘ oh god ‘ at a traffic situation and my kids repeated it.

and it made me think that I hope they don’t repeat it.

I have heard my other nephews and nieces ( from a different SIL ) say this and I didn’t think to correct them on it ( especially as their parents were there ).

I hadn’t really noticed my DD saying it a lot at all. But her aunt did pick up on it. Anyway then it made me think in the car today that I don’t want my kids saying it in case there are other people who think it’s bad for kids to say this kind of stuff. Of course I refrain from swearing but the occasional ‘ oh god ‘ or ‘ jeez ‘ slips out.

thoughts ?

@TropicofCapricorn

My 5 year old isn't allowed to say "jesus/jeez/oh god /oh my god". She knows she could upset people. And children saying it sounds awful.
She says jeepers, oh my days instead.

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'Jeepers' serves the same purpose as 'jeeze' or 'gosh'. It's a corruption - in fact a sort of 'where shall I go with this?' - of 'Jesus'. There are loads of them. 'Sugar', 'fudge', 'crikey', 'crumbs'. All ways to avoid blasphemy or profanity when you're already committed to the first syllable.

'Oh my days' is just fucking irritating.

Same !

I don't believe in any of the more than 1500 'gods' or deities that some of the 8 billion people on Planet Earth mistakenly align themselves to. Swear words, expletives and other exclamations just cheapen our use of better language for appropriate situations.

n.b. I have worked with christians and muslims who take some level of expense when others "cheapen" the deities that they like with corruptions or euphemisms.

I take the view that it's okay to think the cheap forms but chose not to offend my work colleagues and neighbours by notionally insulting their non-existent gods and church icons out loud.

Same! Penny still bouncing in the floor!

I thought it was a corruption of "Gee Whiz" 🤔. Which is not offensive at all!

No. It's a contraction of Jesus. Still wouldn't bother me in the slightest.

I had this chat with DS when he was quite young - that it didn't bother me or his dad, but Christians might find it offensive, so he shouldn't say it in public.

He did briefly get upset that he might offend my DM, which was sweet. He generally doesn't want to upset people.

I wouldn't correct a child who said those things. I would possibly explain to them why some people don't like it, but I wouldn't stop them from saying them.

The discomfort some Christians have around things like 'Oh my God' etc is because the Bible says 'Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain' - it's one of the ten commandments. OK, fine - in that case, if you are a Christian and take a fundamental approach to these things, abide by the teachings of your Bible and don't take the name of the Lord in vain. But I'm not a Christian and therefore I don't have to abide by the teachings of your Bible, and it isn't your place to tell me I should adhere to your religious rules. A Christian has no more business telling a non-Christian not to say 'Oh my God' than a Jew has telling a non-Jew not to eat shellfish, or a Muslim telling a non-Muslim to fast for Ramadan.

Sometimes, if I know someone is religious, I will make the effort to avoid saying things like 'Jesus Christ!' or 'Oh my god!' just out of courtesy to them, without them asking. But that's my choice; it's not something they should demand.

But it's not really the same thing as your shellfish analogy because people are within earshot of you.

Plus no one "demands" it, but a lot of people probably inwardly wince, just because of the way they've been brought up.

I used to give detentions to students saying OMG or Jesus in class. It's offensive to Christians and blasphemous. I also don't think any form of swearing is acceptable in a classroom.

I do feel uncomfortable hearing children using these phrases. I might be in the minority but it doesn't sit well with me any more than them saying more obvious swear words.

I would absolutely have undermined your authority in this case and not allowed my child to complete the detention; your feelings about your religion and your God are yours to manage.

I mean, we talk about compelled speech a lot on Mumsnet - this is the equivalent of a male teacher giving a detention to a pupil for not referring to them by female pronouns and a title.

I completely disagree. It’s blasphemous to YOU because of your own belief system It’s 100% your subjective beliefs at play rather than anything objective.

If you gave my child a detention for saying ‘Jesus’ I’d think you were joking, and then if you actually did it I’d seriously lose all respect for you as a teacher.

I think the example of a child in your class saying ‘Jesus’ is very much one where offence is taken, not given. It’s not my job, or my children’s, to pander to the stories you choose to believe in.

You have assumed I am Christian and am taking offence on a personal level. If you had done this I would have pointed out the school rules regarding offensive speech based on the religion, race, gender or sexuality of others. I'm fascinated that people think this was some kind of personal crusade.

Warnings is one thing but actual detentions over phrases that aren’t even considered offensive to a majority of Christians is ridiculous. Even if someone said those words in a work setting, they would highly unlikely be punished for them.

It was simply treated on the same level as any other swearing in class. I'm becoming fascinated that people think any bad language is acceptable in the classroom!

@pollymere I am completely with you on this. It's a matter of respect, whatever religion you may, or may not, have personally.

Great to see some thoughtful parenting for a change.

If in doubt, don't use the words. Not necessarily telling off, but explaining why it may be offensive to others.

I say "Oh my days" and kids have taken to it too.

I say Jesus or jesus christ quite often. I don't consider it swearing and wouldn't correct my child saying it.

Wince

Me too 😳

If your aim is to not offend Christians, I think “Oh God” would be considered offensive when not used prayerfully, but “jeez” would be not offensive to most.

Wince away, I am Irish and where I am from, everyone says it all the time!

SIL needs to get a grip. Just because she chooses to believe some religious nonsense it doesn’t mean everyone has to watch their language around her. There used to be blasphemy laws in England but thankfully they were finally repealed in 2008.

Did any of the parents object to these unilaterally imposed, personal belief detentions? Did your HT know you did this?
if you tried that shit with my kid, I would have been complaining all the way to the top and back.

point - I’m Scottish so no C of E schools and very few RC schools where I am. I’m talking about in a bog standard school with no religious affiliation - this surely isn’t allowed? How could a teacher give a detention when it’s not swearing in any sane person’s understanding.