Ok who wants to swap £2500 a month in benefits for my husbands MS and my epilepsy, narcolepsy and fibromyalgia.

[bluebirdblackbird]

Well according to a lot of people on here we are on a good thing.

the 20 seizures I have in a week, chronic pain and night terrors, losing my memory after a seizure, pissing myself, hallucinations. They are all great fun. Not to mention the amount of times I have been accused of being drunk after a seizure.

or there is my husband. Diagnosed with progressive MS. Cronic Pain, shaking, cronic pins and needles, weakness in limbs plus losing mobility. Had to give up his teaching job 4 months ago after gradually reducing hours.

Not to mention the judgement when we use a blue badge because we look ok in that moment. And apparently labour are going to find us both work. Yippee cant wait to meet the employer who is going to take us both on. I am sure pissing my chair on a reg basis won’t matter to them or the losing counciouness at least a couple of times a day.

i am just fed up of yet another they are on benefits and get money and it’s not fair stamp stamp stamp. The bastards have saved up for a holiday- it’s not fair. The bastards have a mobility car but they look fine, OMG- they have got new carpets or a new sofa.

since I am guessing they none of the moaners would actually swap places with us if they could then STFU.

oh and that pip that is easy to get- my husband gets lower rate for both and that is despite providing all the evidence and appealing so we are off to tribunal. He can’t even dress himself most days and he can’t hold a pan safely or manage his medication plus many other things. If he stays on the points he is on he will lose his pip completely under these new labour proposals.

but most people know someone who’s friends, aunts, nephews, stepdaughters, cousin twice removed who lied and got it. I was taking to a lady in a wheelchair who does not get any mobility component of pip at all.

You could easily Google that.

And in my experience it’s those forums that were set up to help people understand what they need to do to present their disability in order to make a successful claim. It’s not encouraging people to commit fraud, it’s simply addressing a need for information as a result of lived experience when it comes to making a claim for a very difficult benefit to secure.

For example l dealt with numerous claimants who had been rejected for PIP despite having substantial disability. The reason ? Because they had filled out the form giving a description of what their disability was, thinking that it was enough that they had the condition itself. When the appeals were submitted giving the information the DWP actually needed - the effect of that disability on everyday life - the claims were largely successful.

Lots of the forums use information from the DWP themselves, and it should be noted that DWP advise claimants to seek help wherever possible because they acknowledge that the forms ate complicated. Unfortunately the professional agencies offering help are over subscribed, and claimants can’t access the help they need - which is partly why these self help groups sprang up.

As someone with a long term illness who works full time.... I would love to be able to save up for a holiday or new sofa... but I can't as I pay sooooo much tax.
I don't and never have received benefits of any kind and believe people who need them are entitled to them.
I also believe people in work should be able to afford a decent standard of life.

Is £2.5k everything though? Do you get reduced rent or council tax, free dental care or prescriptions. Do you get any free care? Just wondering what the situation was. The issue for most people is that the system is not transparent.

"And in my experience it’s those forums that were set up to help people understand what they need to do to present their disability in order to make a successful claim."

I agree. Sometimes people aren't successful because they don't answer the question that is being asked or write things that can be misinterpreted. I've advised a few times not to use particular words.

I get accused of being drunk too, I hardly ever drink and haven't been drunk in the last 15 years.

It was especially bad when young, I got expelled for one school because they refused to believe I wasn't drunk (even with proof) and dating was hell too. Mothers who convinced themselves I was some troubles junky with 'self inflicted' issues who would corrupt their precious baby boys. Irony is I never done drugs, I have had so many proscription meds in my life for as long as I can remember (never enjoyed it) that I'm certainly not going to do more of it for 'fun'.

People are so quick to default from 'you aren't acting what we deem normal' to you must be drunk/drugged. Its just the world of ableism.

*interesting though when you say ‘PIP is a lifeline for me when I can’t work’. Surely the money is for use specifically and only on things which improve your quality of life whether you work or not. It is completely separate to any income (whatever the source) coming in.

you say ‘It also pays for the higher costs of my disability which many people don't appreciate for mental health conditions’.
isn’t that the only thing is should be spent on?*

Disability benefits are there to reflect the increased costs associated with being disabled. Those costs change and fluctuate.

At various points my DDs DLA has been used to cover a shortfall in my salary when I had to reduce hours to care for her - household costs hadn’t increased but our income had dropped due to her disability. Me reducing my hours saved money on specialist childcare that she otherwise would have needed amongst other things. It’s covered increased costs of clothes and cleaning costs while she adjusted to having periods, therapeutic supports not available on the NHS, specialist clubs and activities to support her social development, specialist tutors to support her education, and a much needed break for her brother at a point when her needs took us away from him and his needs. It’s paid for travel costs to and from hospital and other health providers, at one point we had 2 x 60 mile round trips a week plus other more local appointments.

Lives change and priorities shift, a support that was once needed isn’t needed any more or alternative provision becomes available. Costs aren’t fixed in stone being able to use funds flexibly to meet this weeks need, which may be different from
last weeks need, is important.

@bluebirdblackbird ge doesn’t get Tom one visit the bloody house , run you down (to keep
you down ) and you still care for the child while he is at your house.
He is taking the poss and he knows it he has you right where he wants you .

You need to start with access . Send a message asking which days he is collecting child and he won’t be in your home anymore

And what would you say to those who are not in your position, who ^could' work and are instead taking resources away from people, like you, who genuinely need it?

I’d agree. I’ve seen some bonkers decisions in my time. I’ve also seen the quality of DWP decision making severely criticised at tribunal where eligibility is clear and the case should never have got as far as expensive tribunal to secure an award. This is an area where vast amounts of money could be saved - at the moment the majority of tribunal decisions are in favour of the claimant. Tribunals are expensive. Why aren’t the government looking at ways to improve the assessment and decision making process so more of the decisions are right first time.

It depends on which benefit we’re looking at. PIP is universal and not an out of work benefit. So the ability to work is irrelevant.

Op I receive dla for a child and there is a massive misunderstanding/judgement from people who just do not understand what my child’s needs involve. Maybe people that are quick to judge need to stop and educate themselves first before commenting. It’s easy to hide on an online forum too.

aren't bpd and bipolar the same thing?

I have always had huge amount,s of evidence to backup.My sons claim
But I find the DLA Facebook group.I'm on give distorted view,of what's y going
There is always Someone insisting they have had a successful based on their word alone ,which makes others think they might be successful too .

It's fine for people to question whether someone needs the money, that is the purpose of a PIP assessment - to establish a level of need. What's not fine is to assume someone doesn't need it without knowing them.

And yes, I know public transport doesn't always make it easy to get to work - I live in a village where we have 4 buses a day, and my nearest bus stop is a 15 min walk from my home. We knew this when we moved to a more rural area, but planned on driving. When you chose where to live and get a job you plan how you will get there in a variety of circumstances - loss of car, poor weather etc. What you don't plan for is developing a disability.

Tbh, I would have got the PIP whether or not my car got written off, I just gave an example of how it improved my independence and ultimately actually saved taxpayers money, rather than the often used assumption that people with disabilities are wasting/don't need this money.

If I didn't have a disability, I could work more hours and pay for a new car that way, which I would much prefer to being in pain and claiming PIP.

Yes, public spending absolutely needs reviewing, I know many people (including us) are fed up of higher cost of living, higher interest rates on mortgages, higher taxes, worsening public services. But targeting those who giving a little support actually ends up saving money is not the answer.

No BPD, is Borderline personality Disorder now more commonly referred to as EUPD
Emotionally,unstable personality Disorder.

This. My DH takes medication for anxiety and has private therapy which we pay for as we both work full time. Most of it is rooted in childhood trauma. He 100% does not need financial support from the tax payer to manage his anxiety, and he’d be the first one to tell you that, but his GP has suggested he apply for PIP twice! Makes you wonder how many doctors are suggesting it to people with manageable conditions.

ah ok, thanks. Wasn’t sure!

A lot of people in this thread seem focused on the idea that too many people are faking disability or getting more than they deserve. I feel they could benefit from understanding the concept of error management. No system is perfect—so we have to decide which types of errors we’re more willing to tolerate.

Take medical screening. With breast cancer, for example, we have two choices:

1. Be cautious—catch nearly every cancer, but some people get false positives and unnecessary scares.
2. Be strict—fewer false alarms, but we miss real cancers and people die.

Most of us accept option 1, because we’d rather deal with a scare than a funeral.

The benefits system works the same way. You can have:

1. A generous system that helps nearly all truly disabled people, even if a few dishonest claims get through.
2. A hyper-strict system that blocks every fraudster—but also denies help to some who desperately need it.

Personally, I’ll take option 1. If someone "games the system," that’s not proof the system is broken. It’s the cost of making sure real people don’t fall through the cracks.

Just like one false-positive mammogram doesn’t mean we should stop screening.

Trying to make every judgment 100% accurate would cost a fortune—and still wouldn’t be perfect. Letting a few ambiguous cases through is the price of having a real safety net. It’s not flawless. It’s just the least-worst option.

I don't know about PIP, but we wouldn't have got DLA for DS without professional assistance to fill in the form because of the way the questions are phrased. Like the questions about washing - DS doesn't wash unless we take him swimming, he will not have a bath or shower in any other circumstance but the question is about how many times you have to remind him to wash and so on. Even the person trained on how to fill in the form had to stop and think about how to get the answers to reflect the reality of DS's needs within the confines of the questions.

One of the main reasons we wanted the DLA is that the cost of the swimming -and its surrounding routine was crippling us - we have to budget £150/mth, if he goes once a week.

If that happens (it doesn't for us, we're considerably worse off than if we both had NMW full time jobs), it's because being disabled is expensive.

I've said in my other post, we have to budget £150 just to get DS to wash and change his clothes once a week. If we lose the DLA we might have to cut back to once a month (especially if I don't have a job at that point).

There are more expensive foods I buy because DS will eat them and it means he's not living off just pizza and cheese & ham sandwiches - if we weren't in this situation and I wanted to cut back on food I wouldn't be buying so many avocados and bags of cashew nuts, and I would certainly never buy a dragon fruit. I'd put a stop to the ice lollies as well, but he's been so anxious recently and ice lollies help him regulate (he used to eat ice which was cheaper, but ice lollies are better than meltdowns). He will only wear a particular kind of welly, which don't last long so cost £30-40 a pair every couple of months. If we're out and he gets distressed we go to Costa because it's a safe place for him. All these and a million other things add up.

I agree but there are people who will.try and claim for anything and everything,they are usually not successful but i see it daily and it just clogs up the system

My child has Severe restricted eating disorder (one of 3 diagnosed medical conditions). He is very underweight, has restricted growth due to it and is under paediatrician led care because he gets quite ill as a result of this conditions. He gets frequent blood tests etc to and medical appointments a lot.

I actually agree with you though that it is a grey area. I have had parents say to me "ohh my child is a picky eater to" but there kids are a little picky not limited to eating 5 foods, they are healthy weights and not sick because of it.

I do think medical and professional evidence should be mandatory with any DLA or PIP application because otherwise it's open to fraud but the government need to start putting money into the NHS to clear waitlists and support services first.

What an unbelievably disgusting thing to write. You would rather be severely disabled for an extra 200 quid a month? How much fun do you think you would have?

I never wish disability on others but in your case I'm bloody tempted. Get off your arse and retrain for a higher paid career. Send your partner job hunting. I literally can't believe you wrote your post.

I find your post equally disgusting to be honest and completely bereft of understanding and empathy. This is someone that's clearly struggling and yet you are keen to use the exact rhetoric that people get slammed for using in regards to disabled people (i.e. get off your arse and get a job/retrain).

This is why resentment is rising. Disabled people don't have some unalienable right to be supported in the way that they currently are. For the vast majority of human history and still in most countries, disabled people don't get the support they get here. To maintain this we need to foster a compassionate society that seeks to support everyone that is struggling. Not just the disabled. They can't be viewed as a class above everyone else as this simply will lead to the erosion of rights as a society can't function if it doesn't pay to work and contribute.

We have had talk on this thread about how a family holiday or a designer bag is a legitimate use of DLA. This is obviously going to engage and upset posters like @Blackbookofsmiles1 who is working hard and will never afford that. It's all very well suggesting that she retrains but someone has to do the difficult and not particularly well paid work. This is where we have the biggest recruitment and retention problems and are often areas that directly impact disabled people e.g. carers. The system is seriously flawed and needs a complete rethink.