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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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15
Thronglet · 03/05/2025 14:26

WeylandYutani · 03/05/2025 13:55

I am on off a little holiday in a few weeks. It will probably be my last as I wont be able to afford to eat once all the changes happen. Life wont be worth living.
Just trying to live in the moment now and not worry about the future. Really hard to do though.

I know. It's terrifying. I've already been in the hospital once with hypokalemia. It's definitely not something I recommend. I thought I was dying. And the magnesium drip they put me on was excruciating.

How much did that cost, in ambulances, A&E resources, a week staying in hospital on drips? A lot more than me being able to afford to eat!

It's not financially viable to starve people. It's a false economy that will leave people even more unable to work and needing expensive medical treatment.

I suppose some are hoping that the funerals will be cheaper.

LadyKenya · 03/05/2025 15:14

Some of the posts here are indicative of the sort of Society we are living in at present. People are not ashamed to punch down, vocally, and unapologetically, and have zero empathy for what they class as other. I have seen, and experienced this type of scorn before. It is getting worse though.

batabata · 04/05/2025 06:31

It's not wrong to discuss these unusual cases where people are seemingly using PIP money to fund lavish holidays (although I don't personally think we know enough to judge here and it's certainly perfectly within the rules). But in focusing so much of our attention on the cases of these relatively well off PIP applicants, we lose sight of the fact that many hundreds of thousands on PIP are barely scraping by as it is and will be pushed into deeper poverty by these cuts. And there will of course be the inevitable suicides and possibly more cases of people starving to death (I'm horrified by the PP who is living with starvation currently - I've also lived with semi-starvation in the past due to my conditions and poor care). This is unforgivable in a country like the UK. What have we become if we allow this?

Which isn't to say the system doesn't need reform but it needs to be done carefully with an eye to preventing the insane levels of harm that these poorly thought out and cruel proposal will have. A system that awards people based on the actual costs they accrue would make more sense or that provides a more viable income for those who are unable to work at all but who are ineligible for UC on account of having a small amount of savings or a partner who earns even slightly more than minimum wage. Where people are able to earn a decent living and don't appear to have that many costs associated with their disabilities is where cuts should be made if they need to be made. But I'm guessing there aren't that many instances of that.

On the other hand, the average Brit goes on holiday 4 times a year now with two of those holidays being international. This rhetoric of people not feeling well off even on high incomes is hard to swallow when you read facts like this. There are obviously low income earners without disabilities who can never afford a holiday as it stands and they should get more support too but if the average person is going on holiday that often then surely we can afford to pay for our disabled to eat.

LadyKenya · 04/05/2025 09:30

I am not a prepper by any stretch of the imagination, but I will make it my business to buy in an extra tin, or so, with my shop. I don't mean to sound crass, as I am aware that is not an option for some people. But I will be trying to build up a little canned food storage, as I have no idea where things are going. I am seeing a change happening right now, and the way that disabled people are being demonised is getting louder. I know that Labour has to do something to balance the books, as they say, but they would do well to look at the way that the PIP assessments are conducted. The tribunals are costing this Country a fortune. Sort that out. People with life long, or never going to improve conditions, should not have to be reassessed every couple of years. It is a waste of money. Review forms being sent out so early, only to clog up the backlog. Why on earth is the whole system not online? People being assessed by people with zero knowledge of the condition the people are suffering from....

Kindersurprising · 04/05/2025 09:46

LadyKenya · 04/05/2025 09:30

I am not a prepper by any stretch of the imagination, but I will make it my business to buy in an extra tin, or so, with my shop. I don't mean to sound crass, as I am aware that is not an option for some people. But I will be trying to build up a little canned food storage, as I have no idea where things are going. I am seeing a change happening right now, and the way that disabled people are being demonised is getting louder. I know that Labour has to do something to balance the books, as they say, but they would do well to look at the way that the PIP assessments are conducted. The tribunals are costing this Country a fortune. Sort that out. People with life long, or never going to improve conditions, should not have to be reassessed every couple of years. It is a waste of money. Review forms being sent out so early, only to clog up the backlog. Why on earth is the whole system not online? People being assessed by people with zero knowledge of the condition the people are suffering from....

I was talking to DH about this and we’re putting some (minor) changes in at home just in case. Going to keep a weeks worth of tins in the garage, put a compost bin in the garden, buy some power banks a stock up just a little on things like candles, medicine etc

We’ve already had 2 power cuts this year, we live in an area where sewage is dumped in the sea and I’m convinced the Birmingham bin strikes will fan out as more council tax goes on social care. Our plan is to compost what we can, rinse out and dry/flatten food packets before putting them in a plastic storage box. Not sure what everyone in Birmingham was thinking just lobbing bin bags of rubbish into the street tbh

Kindersurprising · 04/05/2025 09:49

batabata · 04/05/2025 06:31

It's not wrong to discuss these unusual cases where people are seemingly using PIP money to fund lavish holidays (although I don't personally think we know enough to judge here and it's certainly perfectly within the rules). But in focusing so much of our attention on the cases of these relatively well off PIP applicants, we lose sight of the fact that many hundreds of thousands on PIP are barely scraping by as it is and will be pushed into deeper poverty by these cuts. And there will of course be the inevitable suicides and possibly more cases of people starving to death (I'm horrified by the PP who is living with starvation currently - I've also lived with semi-starvation in the past due to my conditions and poor care). This is unforgivable in a country like the UK. What have we become if we allow this?

Which isn't to say the system doesn't need reform but it needs to be done carefully with an eye to preventing the insane levels of harm that these poorly thought out and cruel proposal will have. A system that awards people based on the actual costs they accrue would make more sense or that provides a more viable income for those who are unable to work at all but who are ineligible for UC on account of having a small amount of savings or a partner who earns even slightly more than minimum wage. Where people are able to earn a decent living and don't appear to have that many costs associated with their disabilities is where cuts should be made if they need to be made. But I'm guessing there aren't that many instances of that.

On the other hand, the average Brit goes on holiday 4 times a year now with two of those holidays being international. This rhetoric of people not feeling well off even on high incomes is hard to swallow when you read facts like this. There are obviously low income earners without disabilities who can never afford a holiday as it stands and they should get more support too but if the average person is going on holiday that often then surely we can afford to pay for our disabled to eat.

I don’t even know how you can though.

The fact is we have more and more and more people crashing out of the workplace and into disability benefits for ND/MH. How do you fix that? I feel like whatever help was put in place they would say it’s not enough or not suitable. It’s not like installing a wheelchair ramp or disabled toilet. These conditions are nebulous and can mean virtually anything on an individual level.

I think Labour know the only way through is necessity with some v unpleasant side effects in the short to medium term. We currently have the equivalent of the entire population of Scotland on disability benefits, it cannot continue.

I think a huge number of voters are tired of their taxes being spend on a small group of people with very high needs.

TigerRag · 04/05/2025 09:56

batabata · 04/05/2025 06:31

It's not wrong to discuss these unusual cases where people are seemingly using PIP money to fund lavish holidays (although I don't personally think we know enough to judge here and it's certainly perfectly within the rules). But in focusing so much of our attention on the cases of these relatively well off PIP applicants, we lose sight of the fact that many hundreds of thousands on PIP are barely scraping by as it is and will be pushed into deeper poverty by these cuts. And there will of course be the inevitable suicides and possibly more cases of people starving to death (I'm horrified by the PP who is living with starvation currently - I've also lived with semi-starvation in the past due to my conditions and poor care). This is unforgivable in a country like the UK. What have we become if we allow this?

Which isn't to say the system doesn't need reform but it needs to be done carefully with an eye to preventing the insane levels of harm that these poorly thought out and cruel proposal will have. A system that awards people based on the actual costs they accrue would make more sense or that provides a more viable income for those who are unable to work at all but who are ineligible for UC on account of having a small amount of savings or a partner who earns even slightly more than minimum wage. Where people are able to earn a decent living and don't appear to have that many costs associated with their disabilities is where cuts should be made if they need to be made. But I'm guessing there aren't that many instances of that.

On the other hand, the average Brit goes on holiday 4 times a year now with two of those holidays being international. This rhetoric of people not feeling well off even on high incomes is hard to swallow when you read facts like this. There are obviously low income earners without disabilities who can never afford a holiday as it stands and they should get more support too but if the average person is going on holiday that often then surely we can afford to pay for our disabled to eat.

How will it then be decided whether something is a disability cost? And then there's the admin involved. Some of us already have a lot of disability related admin

LadyKenya · 04/05/2025 10:27

A system that awards people based on the actual costs they accrue would make more sense

We have seen one idea of how that would look, and it was not viable. The voucher scheme that was mooted, remember? What other way is there, of making sure that people's needs are being met, regarding their disability, other than a cash payment? I cannot think of anything. As it is, the payments are, for a lot of disabled people, not enough to cover the extra costs, as it is.

WibbleyPie · 04/05/2025 12:40

Kindersurprising · 04/05/2025 09:49

I don’t even know how you can though.

The fact is we have more and more and more people crashing out of the workplace and into disability benefits for ND/MH. How do you fix that? I feel like whatever help was put in place they would say it’s not enough or not suitable. It’s not like installing a wheelchair ramp or disabled toilet. These conditions are nebulous and can mean virtually anything on an individual level.

I think Labour know the only way through is necessity with some v unpleasant side effects in the short to medium term. We currently have the equivalent of the entire population of Scotland on disability benefits, it cannot continue.

I think a huge number of voters are tired of their taxes being spend on a small group of people with very high needs.

The fact is we have more and more and more people crashing out of the workplace and into disability benefits for ND/MH. How do you fix that?

By looking at why and addressing it?
Why are so many people 'crashing' out of the workplace? What's happening that tips people from earning and contributing to being unable to in large numbers?
If the equivalent of entire population of Scotland is out of the workforce and claiming disability benefits, then not all of them can simply be too lazy to work because getting benefits is too easy, even if it were too easy to do.

Telling people that their illness or disability doesn't exist, isn't real and so they should go and get a job doesn't remove the illness or disability. We need to look at why it's happening and address that instead of deciding it's not and everyone is just lazy.

Kindersurprising · 04/05/2025 12:45

WibbleyPie · 04/05/2025 12:40

The fact is we have more and more and more people crashing out of the workplace and into disability benefits for ND/MH. How do you fix that?

By looking at why and addressing it?
Why are so many people 'crashing' out of the workplace? What's happening that tips people from earning and contributing to being unable to in large numbers?
If the equivalent of entire population of Scotland is out of the workforce and claiming disability benefits, then not all of them can simply be too lazy to work because getting benefits is too easy, even if it were too easy to do.

Telling people that their illness or disability doesn't exist, isn't real and so they should go and get a job doesn't remove the illness or disability. We need to look at why it's happening and address that instead of deciding it's not and everyone is just lazy.

The ‘why’ is because the advent of screens has ruined the mental health of young people and adults and convinced them that mental health issue is a disability (biggest factor among many)

Thronglet · 04/05/2025 12:46

WibbleyPie · 04/05/2025 12:40

The fact is we have more and more and more people crashing out of the workplace and into disability benefits for ND/MH. How do you fix that?

By looking at why and addressing it?
Why are so many people 'crashing' out of the workplace? What's happening that tips people from earning and contributing to being unable to in large numbers?
If the equivalent of entire population of Scotland is out of the workforce and claiming disability benefits, then not all of them can simply be too lazy to work because getting benefits is too easy, even if it were too easy to do.

Telling people that their illness or disability doesn't exist, isn't real and so they should go and get a job doesn't remove the illness or disability. We need to look at why it's happening and address that instead of deciding it's not and everyone is just lazy.

There needs to be a way that the physically disabled aren't punished by this. It's not possible to 'pull your socks up' and cure a physical ailment.

That said, I'd rather have my physical illness than a mental one.

LadyKenya · 04/05/2025 13:13

Kindersurprising · 04/05/2025 12:45

The ‘why’ is because the advent of screens has ruined the mental health of young people and adults and convinced them that mental health issue is a disability (biggest factor among many)

Lots of grown adults are having their mental health affected by the mammoth, that is social media. It is of course not the whole story of what is happening with the younger people, but seeing as the genie is already out of the bottle, and getting worse now, what with the avalanche of AI, what can be done about it all? And, of course poor mental health can be debilitating.

PhilippaGeorgiou · 04/05/2025 13:51

Thronglet · 04/05/2025 12:46

There needs to be a way that the physically disabled aren't punished by this. It's not possible to 'pull your socks up' and cure a physical ailment.

That said, I'd rather have my physical illness than a mental one.

With respect - and I am physically disabled and opposed to the proposals - but your comment implies that physically disabled are somehow more genuine than others. For starters, I am simply not going to pretend that there aren't people faking it, although they are few - but I have come across people faking physical disability, so there are some. And equally some physical disability can regress - again, it may not be common but that doesn't mean it doesn't happen. The odds of someone with severe mental illness being able to "pull their socks up" and cure their illness is about the same as someone with a physical illness being able to.

We do no favours to anyone by standing divided. I am all for rooting out any fakers. I am also all for supporting people with disabilities to get into work if they are able to do so, not to help out the poor taxpayers (I am one of them - disabled doesn't mean incapable) but because being in work is better for people. But no disabled person should be "punished" for not being able to work, full stop. If we have too many people with disabilities out of work, then we need to fix a whole host of things including employers, training, accessibility, transport, educatioin and the health service.

Thronglet · 04/05/2025 16:16

PhilippaGeorgiou · 04/05/2025 13:51

With respect - and I am physically disabled and opposed to the proposals - but your comment implies that physically disabled are somehow more genuine than others. For starters, I am simply not going to pretend that there aren't people faking it, although they are few - but I have come across people faking physical disability, so there are some. And equally some physical disability can regress - again, it may not be common but that doesn't mean it doesn't happen. The odds of someone with severe mental illness being able to "pull their socks up" and cure their illness is about the same as someone with a physical illness being able to.

We do no favours to anyone by standing divided. I am all for rooting out any fakers. I am also all for supporting people with disabilities to get into work if they are able to do so, not to help out the poor taxpayers (I am one of them - disabled doesn't mean incapable) but because being in work is better for people. But no disabled person should be "punished" for not being able to work, full stop. If we have too many people with disabilities out of work, then we need to fix a whole host of things including employers, training, accessibility, transport, educatioin and the health service.

Sorry I've not made myself clear enough. The pull your socks up was in quotation marks because it isn't my belief that is how it works. It seems to be the general opinion that mental illness can be resolved with gumption, which is ridiculous and damaging, of course.

I actually think mental health is even more debilitating than a physical health condition, which is what my second paragraph was intended to convey.

It's the whole idea that someone with a disability can just shake it off and get a job. It's literally impossible to cure a physical ailment through willpower. Maybe mental illness can be resolved in some cases, but it's not fixed by a can do attitude. Continuing to work in that condition can often exacerbate the mental illness.

I agree that this is something that needs repairing in society in general. And not like the government has proposed.

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