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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think that having a mammogram carried out by a man is preferable to a long wait for an appointment.

897 replies

JudithOnHolidayAgain · 29/04/2025 08:29

I know many people who wouldn't be here now without early detection of breast cancer due to the screening programme.
I have had a few myself.
It's not something I look forward to but it's a few minutes of discomfort that could save my life so I put up with it.
Given the choice I would prefer a woman carry it out as it is quite intrusive but as there is a shortage of female staff I would be ok with a male member of staff as long as there was a chaperone and Iwas told in advance.
If they do change the rules I think there should be a choice.

OP posts:
Gloriia · 29/04/2025 13:32

Finallydoingit24 · 29/04/2025 13:26

Right. But my point is that there are many uncomfortable or undignified procedures including ones for men.

Yes no one disputes tests and procedures are uncomfortable for everyone, both men and women. Needs must however with health care.

However Ive had many a test and a mammogram is up there with being one of the most uncomfortable and faffy. Just such an old fashioned method imo.

There should be a quicker and easier way In this high tech day and age.

Gloriia · 29/04/2025 13:34

Notraintoday · 29/04/2025 13:31

I know nothing about male breast cancer but I would hope that those who come forward are examined by men if that’s what they wish

But why would they?

I worked in health care for years. I never once encountered a man requesting a male for intimate procedures including catheterisation and rectal procedures.

Enigma53 · 29/04/2025 13:35

@Gloriia tell you what IS grim, losing one’s hair to chemo! The breasts in machinery, is the easy bit!

SereneSquid · 29/04/2025 13:38

@Enigma53 these screenings are largely healthy women having a preventative screening. They are not mainly women with breast cancer.

Loungingbutnotforlong · 29/04/2025 13:39

I had my first mammogram last week- female HCP, thank goodness. I’ve given birth, had multiple TV scans and smear tests- sometimes by male HCPs.
I’d always choose a female HCP, if I had the choice.
I’d also say that the mammogram was not easy. The HCP was leaning right on me/ touching breasts/ moving them/ moving me. It was uncomfortable, it hurt and I won’t pretend to be a cool girl and say I’m fine with a man doing it when I’d really much rather it was a woman.

Gloriia · 29/04/2025 13:39

Enigma53 · 29/04/2025 13:35

@Gloriia tell you what IS grim, losing one’s hair to chemo! The breasts in machinery, is the easy bit!

Edited

I've had extensive surgery and treatment and understand what you mean that in comparison it may seem minor but it isn't to many. The seemingly little things can also cause distress.

Gloriia · 29/04/2025 13:41

Loungingbutnotforlong · 29/04/2025 13:39

I had my first mammogram last week- female HCP, thank goodness. I’ve given birth, had multiple TV scans and smear tests- sometimes by male HCPs.
I’d always choose a female HCP, if I had the choice.
I’d also say that the mammogram was not easy. The HCP was leaning right on me/ touching breasts/ moving them/ moving me. It was uncomfortable, it hurt and I won’t pretend to be a cool girl and say I’m fine with a man doing it when I’d really much rather it was a woman.

Yes all this! It is a totally up close and personal, bizarre procedure. Give me a catheterisation from a bloke called Bob any day.

Enigma53 · 29/04/2025 13:44

Gloriia · 29/04/2025 13:39

I've had extensive surgery and treatment and understand what you mean that in comparison it may seem minor but it isn't to many. The seemingly little things can also cause distress.

Fair point. I’ve had that many invasive procedures over the time, that eventually you become immune to it all! 🙄

AllPlayedOut · 29/04/2025 13:44

Gloriia · 29/04/2025 13:34

But why would they?

I worked in health care for years. I never once encountered a man requesting a male for intimate procedures including catheterisation and rectal procedures.

I can’t speak for healthcare but I worked in care for a few years and encountered a few elderly men who requested a man for personal care. They were not comfortable with a young woman bathing them and assisting them with toileting. And that’s absolutely fine and understandable. Their dignity and comfort matters too.

Personally it never occurred to me to take offence, take it personally or think any less of those men for prioritising their dignity and comfort. Yet we have other women on here who are scornful and dismissive of women wanting the same and with even more reason. It’s depressing.

ghostyslovesheets · 29/04/2025 13:45

ItGhoul · 29/04/2025 11:14

I am also a survivor of sexual assault and domestic violence.

As I said in my post - of course there are some women who will find it difficult to be treated by male clinicians. But you presented your experience of mammograms as a universal truth and implied that anyone who says they're no big deal can't possibly have ever had one. That's a very different thing from saying 'For personal reasons, I wouldn't want a man to perform a mammogram'.

I didn’t

bellsbuss · 29/04/2025 13:46

I would just want to be seen as soon as possible and wouldn’t care if it was a man.

SereneSquid · 29/04/2025 13:46

AllPlayedOut · 29/04/2025 13:44

I can’t speak for healthcare but I worked in care for a few years and encountered a few elderly men who requested a man for personal care. They were not comfortable with a young woman bathing them and assisting them with toileting. And that’s absolutely fine and understandable. Their dignity and comfort matters too.

Personally it never occurred to me to take offence, take it personally or think any less of those men for prioritising their dignity and comfort. Yet we have other women on here who are scornful and dismissive of women wanting the same and with even more reason. It’s depressing.

I find a lot of nurses are scornful.

lifeonmars100 · 29/04/2025 13:50

viques · 29/04/2025 11:43

Just a reminder that being a professional with many years of study does not automatically mean that someone is “not” a threat - Wayne Couzens, Harold Shipman - I hope we have gone past the time when people acquiesced to doctors, police officers, teachers because we assumed that what they were doing was a standard procedure that we didn’t understand because they were “professional people with many years of study”. If people are uncomfortable , intimidated or feel they are being pushed into a situation they have not been fully informed about , then they should have the right to know that they can say so and have the situation changed, without having the additional pressure of other people telling them it was fine and dandy for them so shut up, just get on with it and be grateful.

I had my breasts groped by a male doctor when I was a teenager and had to have a medical at work, he did the same to my friend who was also a teenage girl. There have been quite a few cases over the years of male doctors and nurses who have been struck off for sexually assaulting patients .

Member984815 · 29/04/2025 13:51

I had a male doctor examine my breasts when I was referred to clinic for a lump , it honestly never crossed my mind what sex he was, I was just glad to get the appointment. I agree choice should be given but I wouldn't want to wait to see a woman.

EverythingElseIsTaken · 29/04/2025 13:53

I have had gynaecological exams performed by more males than females. I found the men much more respectful and they allowed me more decency e.g. a paper towel from my waist to my knees while the females have always just had me naked from the waist down.

When I found a lump in my breast it was a male consultant that I saw and another male performing the ultrasound.

My children were men. My episiotomies were stitched by men. My 6 week postnatal checks were performed by my male GP.

My DH has his annual work medical carried out by a female doctor including the prostate check. When he was referred to a urologist that was a female too!

Choice is important but my overriding need is the need to be seen promptly by a professional.

Gloriia · 29/04/2025 13:57

Enigma53 · 29/04/2025 13:44

Fair point. I’ve had that many invasive procedures over the time, that eventually you become immune to it all! 🙄

Edited

It's interesting isn it how we are all so different. I have to have a regular procedure that people ask for sedation for, or mris where people need valium to get through it. I could lie there hours with the clattering and banging it's strangely therapeutic Grin.

Mammograms though, ugh. All so rough and faffy. 'Hand here, no like this no there up a bit down a bit'. OMG.

lifeonmars100 · 29/04/2025 13:57

PinkPonyPugClub · 29/04/2025 12:59

If you would rather die of breast cancer than have a qualified person perform a diagnostic procedure on you, you should sign a piece of paper to say that's your choice and get on with it.

But a woman won't "die of breast cancer" if she refuses to have her screening check done by a male, she will elect to be seen by a female. It is about choice, some women don't care, some are ambivalent and some would refuse. I was sexually assaulted by a doctor in my teens back in the bad old days when I did not even really understand what he was doing to me and I am also a survivor of other abuse and attacks which have given me CPSTD so I always elect to see a female doctor/nurse/HCP and they are very understanding.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 29/04/2025 14:02

I suspect that, because doctors were historically always men, and may well still be in the majority, women are resigned to having to put up with male gynaecologists and breast surgeons, but as mammograms are always carried out by women, we haven't had to develop the same resignation.

As male mammogram techs would need to have a chaperone present, won't this end up making the service more expensive - as well as potentially putting off some women?

Also, I can't see how they would always be able to offer women the choice of having a male or female tech doing their mammogram - when I get mine, it's in a caravan in Morrison's carpark, and there is only one tech there - so a whole day's worth of mammograms are, I assume, done by the same tech. So they would have to have a whole day's worth of appointments all with a male tech. Presumably the appointment letter would have to say "When you come for your mammogram, it will be done by Geoff, our new, male tech. Please ring and cancel your appointment if you don't want a male technician squishing and manipulating your boobs (and hope we don't put you back to the bottom of the list as a consequence)". Then if only a handful of women are happy to have Geoff do their mammogram, the van will be standing idle for the rest of the day.

And what if, due to sickness, Geoff has to take over in Morrison's car park, and I walk in expecting a female mammogram tech, and find Geoff there - I am sure many women would find that a bit unsettling - I certainly would - but might feel they had no choice but to accept Geoff's ministrations if they wanted to get their mammogram done.

Can anyone tell me, for a certainty, that men never choose gynaecology or breast surgery as their field of study, because they like the access it gives them to women's bodies? I doubt they can, and I don't see any reason why mammogram technician would be any different.

Pearl69 · 29/04/2025 14:03

I’d be ok with a male radiographer and a chaperone. Just got the all clear after breast clinic visit and mammogram but the referral was made by the male GP who did his own exams too.

Rather that than delay potential treatment. Gynae procedures are far more intimate but no one seems too bothered that it’s usually a male surgeon or consultant.

HesDeadBenYouCanStopNow · 29/04/2025 14:04

It would bother me for a screening appointment (often done in mobile facilities with no additional staff to chaperone). I would be put off due to my personal history. I am reassured when the screening invite arrives and confirms it's a single sex service.

I have no issue with others making a different choice, it is their body, their choice.

But I and some other women would be affected if the service became mixed sex.

We know that certain communities would be negatively impacted unless single sex services were maintained.

Most shortages of staff in NHS currently are down to shortages in funding and training places rather than applicants. Apprenticeships would also help to enable training for people that otherwise couldn't afford to train.

Personally I'm uncomfortable with a man that wishes to train into this service rather than someone as a radiographer being asked to cross train into the specialism. A man that wants to handle boobs of vulnerable women feels questionable

I have the luxury of never having to wait for a screening appointment, they have been prompt, local and efficient, but I'd go out of my way to a single sex service if I needed to

I really dislike that some women are talking down to others about their preference for a single sex service with no understanding of why they may want, or even need, a single sex service.

I love many good men in my life, but there are few I would ever be top less in front of even in awful situations and only one I could allow to touch me

Parker231 · 29/04/2025 14:06

testyarm · 29/04/2025 08:35

I would hate to have a mammogram with a man and would probably not go. I can’t believe that the professional body is suggesting this.

I had a male midwife and male consultant so no different. So long as they are professionally qualified, I’m happy with anyone

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 29/04/2025 14:07

@Pearl69 - having a male mammogram tech and a chaperone would cost the NHS more. Having a female tech makes more economical sense.

Finallydoingit24 · 29/04/2025 14:08

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 29/04/2025 14:02

I suspect that, because doctors were historically always men, and may well still be in the majority, women are resigned to having to put up with male gynaecologists and breast surgeons, but as mammograms are always carried out by women, we haven't had to develop the same resignation.

As male mammogram techs would need to have a chaperone present, won't this end up making the service more expensive - as well as potentially putting off some women?

Also, I can't see how they would always be able to offer women the choice of having a male or female tech doing their mammogram - when I get mine, it's in a caravan in Morrison's carpark, and there is only one tech there - so a whole day's worth of mammograms are, I assume, done by the same tech. So they would have to have a whole day's worth of appointments all with a male tech. Presumably the appointment letter would have to say "When you come for your mammogram, it will be done by Geoff, our new, male tech. Please ring and cancel your appointment if you don't want a male technician squishing and manipulating your boobs (and hope we don't put you back to the bottom of the list as a consequence)". Then if only a handful of women are happy to have Geoff do their mammogram, the van will be standing idle for the rest of the day.

And what if, due to sickness, Geoff has to take over in Morrison's car park, and I walk in expecting a female mammogram tech, and find Geoff there - I am sure many women would find that a bit unsettling - I certainly would - but might feel they had no choice but to accept Geoff's ministrations if they wanted to get their mammogram done.

Can anyone tell me, for a certainty, that men never choose gynaecology or breast surgery as their field of study, because they like the access it gives them to women's bodies? I doubt they can, and I don't see any reason why mammogram technician would be any different.

Unless you’re about 80 years old doctors have definitely not always been men and as long as I have been alive, it’s always been an option to request a female GP for example. The comments about choosing gynaecology to get access to women’s bodies might apply to a very small number but definitely not most men working in that field. They do it for the same reasons as women working in that job do - usually they find it interesting and want to help people. Would you ask a woman whether she chose to be a mammographer because she enjoys touching women’s tits? No because it’s offensive.

Enigma53 · 29/04/2025 14:12

I understand the argument for choice. That some women may struggle with a man performing an invasive procedure. Victims of SA, DV etc.

Perhaps a simple questionnaire is needed, for women to tick whether they would prefer a male or female radiographer? 🤷‍♀️

In my unfortunate experience of dealing with multiple cancers, including breast
( so annual mammograms/ males examining my reconstruction, therefore touching my naked from waist up body) male gynaes with gloved hands feeling for a pelvic mass and so on; well you do kind of just zone out. BUT from reading many posts on this thread, do understand why it is a no for many.

Pearl69 · 29/04/2025 14:14

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 29/04/2025 14:07

@Pearl69 - having a male mammogram tech and a chaperone would cost the NHS more. Having a female tech makes more economical sense.

I had a chaperone during the GP exam and during my Breast clinic appointment too even though it was a female consultant . Just seems to be the norm these days.