Manual driving - need some encouragement please

[Drivingdifficulties]

Long story short for a number of reasons I left learning how to drive to relatively late in life (32 years old). I recently started lessons with a manual instructor but struggling a lot. I had about 15 lessons and left the last lesson feeling completely disheartened because I can’t seem to multitask with the gear changes, speed, traffic etc. I can see the instructor is getting impatient and frankly I understand. I’m feeling like a total idiot who can’t learn this basic life skill, it must be that I lost a brain cell or two after having DS (2). I do want to try and learn manual and would like to think everything is hard in the beginning but I don’t look forward to lessons at all. I would be grateful if someone could offer me some perspective and how you guys felt in the beginning? Thank you!!

@Shortbreadstar I also had a brilliant instructor second time I tried to learn (the first one put me off!) In fact my second instructor had failed his own driving test multiple times and it reassured me that it hadn't been second nature to him either. It took me so long to learn how to reverse or turn in the street, it's actually a bit embarrassing looking back that I couldn't grasp it, but I found it all so daunting I almost couldn't think straight at the time. My instructor was a total hero for not getting exasperated with me (or at least not showing it!)

Switch to automatic! It’s 100 times easier and most new cars will be automatic going forward. I originally passed my test in a manual over 20 years ago, but hated it and never drove again. Finally started refresher lessons 18 months ago in an automatic and it was a revelation. Have now bought an automatic and am tootling about in it happily, which I couldn’t even have envisaged a couple of years ago.

Don’t waste time, money and stress persevering with manual, just find an automatic instructor and you’ll be laughing.

No, theyre not.
Electric cars are obviously- no gears.
I would say manual is important- in an emergency you could drive an auto at at push... but if youv'e only got access to a manual you're shafted.

Can’t reply to all but common sense would tell you I meant any job with a driving element as most companies still have a mixture of of manual and auto vehicles

That isn’t “most jobs”. All the jobs you list employ people without any kind of driving licence.

An actual driving job using company vehicles may require a manual licence but that isn’t even the jobs on your list let alone most jobs.

Driving for police, military or ambulances requires additional training and licensing on top of any other licence all all have many roles which don’t require driving.

Its simply nonsense to say that “the majority off jobs” require even a licence let alone a manual license.

Common sense would tell you to say to post what you actually mean to say rather than making sweeping, incorrect statements.

Ten years ago I pushed my husband to learn in a manual car, to give us more options when buying a car and for holidays as hire cars used to be almost all manual and you paid a fair bit more for an automatic (if you could find one). I wouldn’t given that advice now. There are loads of autos around and that will only increase as the market moves towards EVs. The last couple of times we have hired a car we have been given an automatic without even requesting one.

I learnt in a manual, took me ages. I now only drive auto and would never go back.

We rent auto cars without issues, have ours fixed without re-mortgaging, have had many jobs without any requirement to drive a manual car. The one and only time I was forced to drive a manual was when I had to borrow a car from the garage whilst mine was being fixed. This was 6yrs ago and every garage car since had been auto.

thank you and duly noted
i’ll remember that for any future post in case there read by the hard of understanding

But what would the scenario for that be? All our family cars are auto now.

When in a hole stop digging.

If you want complain that people have not magically perceived what was in your head as opposed to what you have actually written in your post then it is a good idea to at least get your SPAG in order.

2/3 of the cars on my drive are manual. My mum’s car is manual, as is my sister’s My dad’s is auto. If we needed to borrow a car, odds are it would be manual.

My neighbour’s camper van, which we often borrow, is manual.

The last Luton van I hired to move a load of stuff was manual.

I do a lot of European road trips. Most small hire cars are manual.

My 14 year old has been doing teen driving lessons since she was 12. The cars are all manual.

By no stretch of the imagination are autos taking over in my life!

Then manuals are important to you, not necessarily everyone which is what you implied. Your family I imagine will have more automatics as time passes.

In our family:

DH and I have automatics
DD had an auto, her bf a manual
DS had an auto
Mother and step have autos
DH uses his deceased father's manual when he visits his mother. It was registered in 2004!

When abroad, I have no issues hiring an auto and it costs barely more than a manual.

we wouldn't hire a van without a man!

Sorry your having a difficult time of it, I passed my test in December 2024 at the age of 29 so understand what is like to be an older learner.

I tried learning many times over the years but it was only with the last instructor that I really “got it” I just never felt very comfortable before that and Id had 4 different instructors over the years! I was also insured on my husbands and dads cars so did a lot of practice outside of the lessons under their supervision which also really helped if that’s an option for you.

If you can switch to automatic lessons that’s what I would do personally, I did manual because there isn’t many instructors that offer automatic in my area but it is just so so much easier. My husband hates driving manual so we will always only ever own automatics now, it’s really not a problem.

I think if you’ve had 15 lessons recently and still feel like you’re struggling then something’s not working so I would look to either change instructors or if possible just switch to automatic x

My thinking is that being able to drive an automatic is miles better than not being able to drive anything so if that’s what you’ve got to do I wouldn’t hesitate

I'd definitely just learn auto, in fact I did, passed my test first try after about 2 months of lessons, so easy! I've had cars of all different shapes and sizes (Citroën c1 to an SUV Jaguar) and all automatic, all courtesy cars have been too. Saves you a lot of time, money and faff!

Think of the stupidest person you have ever met in your life. Can they drive? If they can, so can you! It is a question of practising for as long as it takes. But everyone gets there in the end.
Don't worry, you will be fine.

Auto.
I switched to an electric auto and it’s amazing would never go back to manual what a faff. It’s so much nicer just press button and go.
I drove manual for 30 plus years.
All those what if you need to drive a manual I wouldn’t drive abroad etc

Conversely the some of the most intelligent people I know have had difficulty learning to drive. DD for example, is dyspraxic

Going against the grain here ...I'd say stick to manual, change instructors and persevere.

It took me ages to learn to drive. I was really shit and took me a long time to grasp.
I had lessons age 17 and gave them up as I couldn't get it plus I didn't get on with my instructor.
Age 24 I took an intensive course, still couldn't do it but after the course I kept in touch with the instructor who lived locally and I had tons and tons of lessons with him and passed 2nd time. I wouldn't like to know how many hours it took me. I'm going to estimate 70-80 and that was after the course!

It will one day become natural to you.
If afterwards the time comes when you need to drive an automatic, you'll find it so so easy to pick up after driving a manual. It's almost too simple!

But to have the skill of driving a manual is great and I think still valid. Good luck x

Looking the on the Cargiant in London website, only 30% of cars are manual. That may be a bit skewed because we have ULEZ here so more hybrid and electric cars than elsewhere.

I personally feel that learning in a manual car made me hate driving. Struggled with it. Passed in second go but bought an automatic car. Wish I just learnt automatic from the start.