Risky behaviour for the larger mumsnetter

[1BodyProblem]

NC. I think society is very inclusive these days and as a larger lady I don't come up against many issues. There are however some sticking points (literally) which I've decided just need to be acknowledged but can't be solved. I recently went to an away game at a championship football ground and quite frankly I couldn't get through the turnstile gate. It was an old metal gate, probably built before the second world war and just couldn't accommodate me. I had to find an alternative entrance but as you can imagine, it was embarrassing and there were some laddy jeers from those queueing. I would quite frankly like to have been bluntly warned before even attempting the gate "not for large fans" or similar instead of risking my circumference squeezing through unnecessarily. It's the same for some theatre seats at old venues. Just tell me before I book this is not for big people. Anyone agree ?

I'm of a larger build around the middle and also faced a similar thing at a football match. Sort of luckily, I need to use a stick if I'm going to be standing for a while so had that with me. An official saw me with it and kindly ushered me through a gate before I got to the turnstile!

Mumsnet is itself risky for larger Mumsnetters, imho.

’OP, why don’t you just eat less and move more?’ / head tilt

I suppose it’s difficult to get the messaging right. There’s not really any definitive measure of “large”, and plenty of large people think that they’re average, so “if you are of a larger build please note that you will need to use the main gate for entry” isn’t going to be a fix.

Two options.

1. Very NHS approved/ focus group tested,

"High BMI? Try another gate"

1. To the point :

"Risky for fatties"

(Breaks the taboo through bluntness)

I was 102 kg so I feel your pain OP!! Only I it bought me up short and I realised I didn’t want to embarrass my kids again getting stuck in the turnstiles/airplane seats / kids + parents rides at theme parks.. so i embraced the WLI (the money I saved on food FAR exceeded the cost ) now they want me to go everywhere..

And what about those tiny toilet cubicles when you have to squeeze yourself behind and to the side to get in.

Was your attempt at irony really an attempt to undercut empathy?

What do you mean? The poster was surely just pointing out the faux-naive responses that threads like this receive - as though it simply hadn't occurred to people to try to "eat less, move more" and that it's not that simple for many people.

In terms of how to warn people tactfully, if this is a regular problem for fans they could perhaps have a note on the booking system somewhere along the lines of "please note the turnstiles in Gates B and C have a width of Xcm. Wider turnstiles are available at Gates A and D" (ie a neutral note about the space, not making it about the size of the person).

I totally get the context of the post! It hasn’t happened. Which is good, yes there is the potential for it to happen. I know! But just as @Cursory has done, and that there are those that would jump on with the negative comments that the post alludes to, there is also on the first few posts of certain types of thread those that jump on as @Cursory does with such sentiments.

Oh I see, sorry!

I think the responsibility to find out if something is suitable for you lies with you, not the venues you want to use.

I can see your point OP but it would be abit awkward to mention. Maybe venues don't want to be accused of fat shaming.
And the further back you go the smaller people were....just look at a spiral stair in a medieval castle! Built for dormice!

I'm sorry to hear that happened to you OP. I agree that there should be some notice on the website informing people that there are alternative entrances if you are over a certain size. They should have these for cinema, planes, theatre and other places which can only accommodate up to a certain size.

I recently went to the theatre, quite an old one. It’s not my thing at all but a relative had free tickets so asked me to go. I’m a size 22ish and I only just fit into the seat😱

You could try the seat review website to see what people say about that particular theatre? Some are very uncomfortable for anyone with longer legs etc.

Was it the turnstiles at Luton?

Sorry that you had to experience that! It is important that this is discussed and brought out into the open.

Did you contact the venue and make them aware? They do have a duty to provide access and seating to everyone but if people don’t contact the venue every time this happens nothing will change.

Some airlines do have ‘customer of size’ policies.

Would it not to better to trust people to use their eyes and judgement than to risk the humiliation and potential uproar of literally having signs up saying 'please don't attempt to squeeze into these seats or those turnstiles as you are too fat'?!

Be* better

I guess the issue is, how do you make any signage useful to people? Your ability to fit though the turnstile depends on your girth. Someone could be heavier / larger than you but due to their shape might fit through just fine. They could put the width of the gap I suppose. Would that have been useful do you think?

Last time I went to Alton Towers I noticed that there was a “trial seat” (not sure of the correct terminology!) in an unobtrusive corner near the ride. I saw some “people of size” trying it out in a very matter of fact way. I thought it was a good idea. I regularly go to the theatre (it’s 100 years old) and see some very large people looking quite uncomfortable.

Except by that point they are there?

Hellyes. I’m 5’3” 125lb and I struggle. I have no idea how anyone bigger copes. There is nowhere for the body to go whilst closing the door. You end up sort of straddling the loo to shut the door

I think you’ve completely mis read this message

It sounds like you could have done with knowing the dimensions of the turnstile in advance. “Please note, max width of turnstile is XX cm. Alternative accessible gate of XX cm available”

Yo😐u struggle at 8stone 9lbs? Sorry but how? How must be tiny. Sorry, I'm not being unkind I'm genuinely baffled