To be scared of driving on motorways ?

[Tulippilut]

I passed my test 6/7 years ago. Never been on a motorway.

I was a very nervous driver to start with , I hated it. Covid hit and the roads were quieter so I went out a bit more. There wasn’t much to do so I drove a little further afield .

The most I have ever drove is about 40 miles away. However, I used to be petrified of the city centre then one day I just did it. Now I regularly do ( I live in a big city , very busy city centre . People I know who live in smaller areas say they would hate to have to drive in my city ) . I am always out and about now - I can get in the car and be doing so much that I easily drive around for 4 hours ) . I drive daily for work , through another busy town centre.

I will occasionally drive out of my way a little to avoid a right turn I don’t like 🤣 and I stay away from multi lane roundabouts if I can help it . I do also get a bit scared about overtaking buses / lorries .. there have been times I have stayed in the left lane behind them when everyone is overtaking them ! I do drive on plenty of dual carriageways / those big a roads .

I would love to take the children to the beach for a day out but the closest is 2 hours away and on a motorway. I have never driven on a motorway . I don’t know if I have left it too long or built it up in my head too much that I would be too nervous ? It’s the idea that you’re on there and you can’t just sneak out on to a side road .

Any advice or do I just leave it now ? I would want to be completely comfortable as I would be carrying precious cargo ( my children ! )

YABU - just do it already
YANBU - you have left it too long

It took me a couple of years after passing to brave a motorway, but driving on one is actually much easier than many main roads. I still hate the multi lane interchange/roundabouts to get on/off them though. But motorways themselves are a breeze, it’s actually such a downer coming off and having to do a boring 30mph again 🤣.

It sounds like you’d benefit from some refresher and motorway lessons with a good driving instructor in order to refine your skills + build up more confidence.

You could pay for a driving instructor to come out with you for a drive on the motorway.
Don't feel embarrassed about it, a lot of people do this immediately after passing their test, or after a month or two when they have gained some confidence in general driving and feel ready to go on a motorway.

This is exactly what I was going to suggest too!

If for no one else, please get some professional help so you aren't freaked out with children in the car if there is a diversion onto the motorway or a real need (emergency) to go onto one!

I was terrified to drive on the motorway at first and used to get so sweaty doing it from fear. You've just got to bite the bullet and do it, I prefer motorway driving as it's easy and compared to city driving it's a doddle.

Go on your own or with another driver who can talk you through it and try.

If motorway lessons are too pricey, you could also try just going on for one junction at a quiet time like early on Sunday morning. It really does get easier the more you do it.

You’ll be fine - motorways aren’t v different to dual carriageways. You can’t get off either apart from an exit. There is nothing stopping you just joining and sitting in the slow lane until your exit and then leaving. But I echo everyone else that a motorway lesson is the way forward!

I find motorway driving really easy, much easier than driving in a city where you have turns/roundabouts/pedestrians/bus lanes etc to consider. Perhaps do a motorway driving course to build your confidence.

OP I'm the same. I'll happily (well not happily but I'll do it!) drive right through central London, west end, whatever. But motorways freak me the hell out. I HAVE done it a few times. Usually on the way too or from an airport but I absolutely hate it. I'm sweaty, with palpitations the whole bloody time. I agree, it's partly the thought that if you miss your turn off you might have to go 10 miles or so to the next one, and partly the whole changing lanes at speed that I find so terrifying. Ugh.

I didn’t drive on a motorway for years after I passed. For me it was the joining that put me off. Decided to man up and do it and it was fine after a few goes. You just need to take the plunge.

Motorways are the easiest roads to drive on as everyone just goes in the same direction (straight).

If you drive on dual carriageways surely motorways aren't a big difference (except they don't have annoying roundabouts every 5mins).

I hate driving on motorways too. I avoid them if I can, although I have to say that it's become easier over the years and I don't get that awful panic anymore if I have to use one. I've been driving since 1990! 😄

Motorway driving is so easy - you just need to filter on and then you can stick to the inside lane til you want to come off. Seriously, it is the easiest place to drive. I drive regularly from London to Scotland - I love motorway driving! Service stations are the main challenge imo - the motorway bit is fine. Good luck.

I do think there are motorways and motorways. Many are very simple to navigate and very similar to A roads - M50 or M54 for example. Others are faster but still navigationally simple - M11; M40.

There are a few - M25; whatever that one is through Glasgow; occasional bits of the M6 and M5 - where frequent division into lanes going in different directions, then merger, make consistent lane driving and navigation tricky. I’d work up to those gradually!

Motorway driving is a breeze compared to city driving! No bends, no pedestrians running out, no cars suddenly turning, no bloody cyclists etc...

Just remember to use BOTH mirrors when changing lanes, and constantly check mirrors to see what traffic is doing.

Definitely book a couple of motorway lessons - I found them really useful when I passed as the instructor pointed out things like how to anticipate behaviour, like someone in front moving to the middle lane to let someone in off the slip road.

I’m a confident driver but I booked a couple of refresher lessons after living in London for 8 years without a car - apparently it’s pretty common when people haven’t driven for a while.

You could always contact a local driving school and ask if they would give you a few hours motorway tuition.

Sorry, cross-posted.

If it helps reassure you, I deliberately programme my sat nav to take me on motorway routes, even if it's slightly quicker not to use them.

Motorway driving is so easy that I can just join and sit on 'auto pilot' until I get to my junction.

To be fair, I think that anyone driving well outside their ‘normal’ roads may - or rather should - be nervous and thoughtful about what their specific hazards are.

Very good motorway drivers may drive very poorly on minor country lanes (whether they think they do so or not); urban drivers may take some time to adjust to major motorways; country drivers may not drive as well as urban drivers in city centres.

Ideally, every test should incorporate all types of driving, and be re-taken at regular intervals. As this is impractical, it seems entirely possible that thoughtful, safety conscious drivers may be concerned about the challenges of very different roads - for someone to say this is the sign of a ‘bad’ driver may indicate a — misplaced—arrogance.

It does also depend on the type of car you drive. I drive an economical, small car ideal for town and country driving. Its lack of acceleration is exposed in joining motorways, and its lack of size makes multiple lanes of HGVs somewhat intimidating to join. On the other hand someone driving a large SUV would struggle in the tiny streets and parking spaces my car navigates with ease.

Motorways are way easier than driving in a city centre.

I was exactly like this. I don’t need to drive on motorways and left them. Then, inevitably- I had to and had a panic attack. It was horrible. HOWEVER. Nothing bad happened. I didn’t pass out or lose control or lose my exit. I had to do it again a few months later and forced myself. It’s not driving that’s the problem- it’s fear. You can drive. Driving on a dual carriageway is almost exactly like driving on a motorway. It’s just driving. You’re fearing fear itself and not being able to escape. I drove the second time and it went really well and I haven’t thought about it since and have driven on motorways loads of times. What I do know is that had i had left it, I would’ve built it up and up in my head making my life smaller and more inconvenient and not being able to take my kids to nice places.

I'm not a fan of motorway driving with kids, plus it always takes longer than getting a long distance train and I'm usually tired. I think it depends where you are, some places have lovely quiet motorways with simple entries, some, like my local one are nicknamed 'death junction' even though I don't think that is true but it always amazes me how everyone ends up in a different direction in one piece. I have to use 3 motorways and the M42 to see my family, it's not fun but I've never had any trouble and there is a feeling of relief when I'm on! Most people are sensible on the motorway, no-one wants an accident.

One thing I like is you can use Google maps to look up routes and pick a junction that looks ok, can even follow it for a while with the street view to help plan and prepare

Why are service stations a challenge?