Small children on Long haul flights

[Lovetocook49]

Can I ask everyone’s opinions please ?
We have just come back from a
holiday to the Maldives . We found a cheap trip and booked , we have had a great week .

On our return flight , 11 hours long, there was a young family, 2 boys , one a toddler, one a few years older. My husband was chatting to the Dad , and they had gone just for a holiday - family not living there or anything.

The youngest boy had a very fractious journey , parents frazzled trying to keep him happy , minimise crying etc poor poppet was not a happy toddler.

I don’t get it ? The kids are so young they won’t remember the holiday , why put them through such a long flight ?

Just wondering others thoughts 🤷‍♀️

Are you comparing something like taking your kid to Peppa Pig World for the day at a cost of around £45pp to going the Maldives for a couple of weeks costing thousands, requiring an 11 hour flight and there being nothing child centric about the destination whatsoever? With a straight face you are making that comparison?

What’s everyone “needs” for holidays is tbh. But people choose to travel, and fair enough.

We started flying long haul with my daughter at 3. Younger than that felt like too much of chore for all involved. She has been all over, including the Maldives at 5, and has been great on the flights.

Maybe one or both of the parents is into diving and they went for that. Maybe they just enjoyed a nice relaxing holiday by taking advantage of the kids clubs many of the resorts offer now.

If I’m on a long haul flight and there’s a kid crying, I remind myself that the child and their parents have as much right to travel and to exist in public spaces as I do, and as I can’t afford to fly privately, it’s just something I have to tolerate.

What is this logic of they won’t remember it? If they won’t remember things then why not just stick kids in a cardboard box until they’re 7? What’s the point if they won’t remember, right?

Their parents will remember it with them, their siblings will, they’ll probably remember part of it and they’ll have photos to look back on? There’s many reasons to go to the Maldives over other places and I imagine god forbid the parents wanted a nice holiday and a slightly tricky flight for a relatively small part of the time was worth it for the rest of their break in an incredible place. Jeeze.

Are you in all serious saying that deciding to take a 2 year old to say Spain instead of the Maldives, as it’s more age appropriate is the same as letting them eat nothing but sweets? That those situations are both “indulging” children? Come on now. Be sensible.

One is stopping them from having a lifetime of serious health issues and an early death and one is picking a holiday that’s more family friendly for the very small number of year that your child is very young.

I definitely wouldn't do it but some people must feel that it's worth it!

I agree, you never seem to get a sensible discussion on this here.

We didn't go long haul with our son until he was 5 or 6.

You can have perfectly lovely child friendly holiday without going so far. It's kinder to the child.

I know two other couples that took the same choice.

At the end of the day each to their own, but frankly a long return flight with a fractious child would just undo the benefit of the holiday for me. I also wouldn't want to inflict an unhappy child on others for purely selfish reasons, which ultimately getting your tan in the maldives rather than jersey is.

I think it depends on child and occasion. My Dad for his 60th birthday wanted to take the whole family to Florida and Barbados. Our children were 3 and 4 and had never flown before and I was initially reluctant. It was tough keeping them occupied for the 9 or 10 hour flight but they were fine and now as adults love travelling. My Dad died a few years later so I am glad we did it. We have just come back from a week in Majorca with our children and young grandchildren. Personally I would choose short haul while they are young.

Sticking a 2 year old in a kids club with strangers in a foreign country is its own discussion…

I wouldn’t. My kids are 11 and 10 and haven’t been any further than Portugal
no regrets whatsoever
bur lots of friends have. I don’t get it but clearly a lot of people do
that said we have taken the kids on long car journeys eg to the south of France. I guess some people (who perhaps might fly for 12 hours! wouldn’t do that

I agree with you. I think taking a 2 year old on an 11 hour flight for a holiday is bonkers.

The reason to say “if they won’t remember it why bother” is because of the effort versus reward involved. Surely you can see that? It isn’t about “putting a child in a cardboard box until they are seven”.

It’s saying is it sensible to spend thousands of pounds and all the stress and effort it takes to have a 2 year old on a 11 hour flight, different time zone, nothing other than the beach for them to do, when they won’t remember it any more than they would remember a much cheaper and easier holiday which they would enjoy just as much and the parents will have just a lovely memories from.

As wil every other passenger affected by the child's behaviour

Surely if you can’t afford to fly first class or private (which I definitely can’t), you just put up with the fact that you’re in a public space with other members of the public, including children, who have as much right to exist in that place as you do?

Long distance economy flights aren’t most people’s idea of fun, even without a screaming baby in the cabin. They’re a means to an end - getting to your destination.

The parents probably didn’t expect their child to be fractious. We took ours on long haul trips every year from 6 months onwards.

I don’t remember the flights, but I do remember the amazing holidays.

We took our 6 month old. He enjoyed swimming every day. He had begun weaning and enjoyed trying new foods, we got to enjoy doing normal baby stuff in beautiful surroundings and have an amazing break. Like you we got an amazing price on the flights (business class) so should we or indeed any parent miss out just so you can keep it for yourselves? Feel free to hire a private jet next time.

Well taking public transport does mean that members of the public, which includes small children, may well be there.

But not for 14 hours.
And one can get off a bus at the next stop. Not so easy at 37,000ft

Absolutely none of my business.

Kids travel too, it’s public transport, occasionally they’ll be on the plane.

Sometimes they’ll be frazzled. As long as the parents are doing their best, and actually parenting them, I don’t really care.

That’s a strange thing to say. Most adults won’t remember anything before age 2 or 3.

We don’t keep them at home until the age they’ll form permanent memories.

Their personality will already be half formed by then and the experiences they’ve had are part of that. Maybe the parents wanted to broaden their horizons.

Why are you so invested in their lives? Poppets have tantrums anywhere, should they just stay home and go nowhere then?
We took ours on long haul flights, we have family a long way away and we wouldn't stop going to see them just because one of the children got fractious on the flight.

Because they wanted a holiday and the kid will be fine! They may remember, we took our DC on first long haul flight when they were 3. Absolutely fine behavior and they absolutely remembered the trip. Took DC on a shorter (only 6 hour) flight recently (now age 7) and they weren’t crying but were super fussy because of delays and an early start. Did 11 hours 6 months ago and absolutely fine. Sometimes kids are crabby even when they’ve been fine before.

Long haul economy flights aren’t fun for anyone, but they get you to your destination. You’re not entitled to a first class/private flying experience if you’re not willing to pay first class/private prices.

I'll be travelling to Australia with my DD, SIL and a 4 yr old and just turned 1 year old next Feb.
We also flew there last February, when dgs was only 2. He was perfectly behaved on each leg of the flights. Maybe the baby (currently very new) will be. Maybe she'll scream the whole time.
But it will be no one else's business why (DS1 lives there)
And yes our toddler remembers and talks about it 😁