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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

A car one (with pic!) WWYD??

126 replies

Kubricklayer · 15/04/2025 08:53

Yesterday afternoon I was at a drive thru. Ordered my food and was told to wait in one of the bays, so I parked in the only available bay right in the corner of the car park.

Received my food and promptly went to leave. I put the car in reverse, looked in my rear view mirror, saw there was nothing there and started reversing.

Almost immediately there was a coming together of me and a van which was in the perpendicular row of spaces (see pic). Not much damage to either vehicle. Light scuff on my rear wheel arch and bit of paint off the front of his works van.

2 questions:

  1. Who was at fault?
  2. Should I report to my insuance?

For 1) I think it was a genuine 50:50 accident. His van was so big it was over the front of the space and about a foot from the side of my car. So as I'm reversing I'd have no way of telling he was moving forward. Equally given the close proximity he'd probably not easily see my reverse lights were on.

For 2) I know someone who can fix it for £150, so I'd rather do that than say to my insurance. But the guy was really pissed off calling me a stupid f*king cnt and a halfwit etc so I'm concerned I don't say anything, he tries to claim off me and how the insurance company will view that?.

Appreciate any advice.

A car one (with pic!) WWYD??
OP posts:
Zebedee999 · 15/04/2025 12:49

It's why many work places insist all cars are reverse parked nowadays as it is safer to exit a space forwards.

Doesn't help OP but maybe everyone reading this could reverse into spaces from now on :-)

godmum56 · 15/04/2025 13:23

LetTheWindBlowBackYourHair · 15/04/2025 12:32

Are you saying you get back to your parking spot with your trolley, realise you can't get to the boot, abandon the trolley, drive out of the space into the road and then load up your shopping while your car is just in the middle of the supermarket road?!

Or perhaps your supermarket car parks are different to mine?!

Edited

no I don't realise, I plan to do it, I only have to pull out by a foot or so....its in my local nursery, not the supermarket. I get my supermarket shopping delivered.

godmum56 · 15/04/2025 13:27

Nominative · 15/04/2025 12:27

And then you are parked partially in the roadway so you are much more of a danger to everyone else.

no more than someone with a trolley loading into an open boot also in the road.

CuriousCatCat · 15/04/2025 13:29

I reported an accident to my insurance, it was my fault, there was no damage to my car, there was minor damage/ scuffs to the other car. I exchanged details with the other driver and then reported to my insurance. Couple of days later the other driver contacted me and said the mechanic at their work (company car) could do the repair for £150. I transferred the money, they never reported to their insurance.
My premium went up at renewal time as the accident was on my file but about 6 months later my insurance contacted me with a refund saying the other car had never claimed and so their renewal fee had been too high. So I would say report to insurance and even if the premium goes up, if the other car doesn’t report it’ll sort out eventually and if they do report your version is on file. My insurance was with the Halifax.

LetTheWindBlowBackYourHair · 15/04/2025 13:35

godmum56 · 15/04/2025 13:23

no I don't realise, I plan to do it, I only have to pull out by a foot or so....its in my local nursery, not the supermarket. I get my supermarket shopping delivered.

Oh I see, fair enough then.

Summertimeblahness · 15/04/2025 15:19

DoNotIron · 15/04/2025 11:21

Always? Even at, say, the supermarket? Or a garden centre? How do you load stuff into your boot if it’s a couple of inches away from another car or a wall and facing the wrong way? I often wonder how people get their trolleys round the back of the car to load their shopping in. I reverse in when I don’t need access to the boot. So a lot of the time, but not ‘always.’

carry the bags from front to back or pull out if needed.
Better to be a bit inconvenienced than reversing in to another car or worse a person don’t you think?

AngelicKaty · 15/04/2025 15:50

JustMyView13 · 15/04/2025 12:31

OP wasn’t observing the direction of travel, which is the first problem. If they were, they would’ve seen the van, and stopped. You’re taught in the UK to stop if another vehicle is nearby when you are in this position, and wait for the vehicle to pass.
OP backed out into the vans line of travel.
Not looking, and then claiming you couldn’t see, isn’t going to hold as a defence unfortunately.

But surely all that would apply to the van driver too? And the fact that he hit OP in the side of their car shows that OP was reversing first.

Didshejustsaythatoutloud · 15/04/2025 16:07

Kubricklayer · 15/04/2025 10:20

Fair enough. I do almost always reverse into a space. The only time (with exception to yesterdat) I don't is if I'm someone where there's a heavy presence of traffic and I know upon leaving there will be nobody around. For example, parking in an indutrial estate at 7pm on a saturday night, going to the cinema and coming out at 11pm and the place is dead.

Still a lesson. Nobody is above continual improvement. 😀

Edited

Typical eh, I think that's exactly what would happen to me if I reversed out a space, that's why I don't do it. 😂
Pretty disgusting of the guy to call you the unmentionable C word though.

Kubricklayer · 15/04/2025 16:25

Didshejustsaythatoutloud · 15/04/2025 16:07

Typical eh, I think that's exactly what would happen to me if I reversed out a space, that's why I don't do it. 😂
Pretty disgusting of the guy to call you the unmentionable C word though.

Yeah. I was so bemused at his approach to the situation, but then again perhaps he had bad news earlier that morning, who knows.

Ultimately, I phoned the insurance company with a 'hypothetical question' on the incident and they confirmed if I put in an information only note on my policy, with evidence and details etc, then as long as they pay out zero money, my premiums, no-claims etc will remain unaffected (effectively nothing happened).

As I don't know the drivers intentions I just have to assume the worst that he'll try and claim. So I filled out the form online with all the relevant details and submiited it. Best case scenario he doesn't claim and my insurance moving forward is unaffected. Worst case scenario he does claim and my premiums will go up regardless.

But the situation was categorized online as 'both parties emerging from parked position' and filling in all the details the status liability was stated as 'Split'.

Anyways appreciate all the advice folks and will definitely try to reverse in next time.

OP posts:
Didshejustsaythatoutloud · 15/04/2025 16:49

You defo did the right thing contacting your insurers because you know they look for any reason to screw you/us

maslab · 15/04/2025 20:00

You were moving and he wasn’t?

That’s on you I’m afraid. You didn’t check properly before manoeuvre. They’ll find you at fault. Check your left blind spot next time.

maslab · 15/04/2025 20:01

The van driver sounds awful though. Insurance is the safest way to deal with him.

DoNotIron · 15/04/2025 20:45

Summertimeblahness · 15/04/2025 15:19

carry the bags from front to back or pull out if needed.
Better to be a bit inconvenienced than reversing in to another car or worse a person don’t you think?

Don’t I think? Well obviously not😆

MesmerisingMuon · 15/04/2025 20:56

Kubricklayer · 15/04/2025 08:53

Yesterday afternoon I was at a drive thru. Ordered my food and was told to wait in one of the bays, so I parked in the only available bay right in the corner of the car park.

Received my food and promptly went to leave. I put the car in reverse, looked in my rear view mirror, saw there was nothing there and started reversing.

Almost immediately there was a coming together of me and a van which was in the perpendicular row of spaces (see pic). Not much damage to either vehicle. Light scuff on my rear wheel arch and bit of paint off the front of his works van.

2 questions:

  1. Who was at fault?
  2. Should I report to my insuance?

For 1) I think it was a genuine 50:50 accident. His van was so big it was over the front of the space and about a foot from the side of my car. So as I'm reversing I'd have no way of telling he was moving forward. Equally given the close proximity he'd probably not easily see my reverse lights were on.

For 2) I know someone who can fix it for £150, so I'd rather do that than say to my insurance. But the guy was really pissed off calling me a stupid f*king cnt and a halfwit etc so I'm concerned I don't say anything, he tries to claim off me and how the insurance company will view that?.

Appreciate any advice.

"Light scuff on my rear wheel arch and bit of paint off the front of his works van."

Usually, it's the person reversing at fault. BUT... from what you've written above, then if the damage is on your rear wheel arch and the front of his van, then you were clearly well into your manoeuvre before contact was made, which implies that he was not looking when he moved forward. Perhaps he was busy texting on his phone so not looking forwards...

If the REAR of your car had hit the SIDE of his van, then absolutely it would have been your fault.

I would be tempted to contact the insurance as well as the police, stating that the van drove into the side of your car, you gave him your contact details but they have not contacted you yet so you could have their contact details. If you then get a police number, the drive through can give you the number plate details.

I'd be suspicious why he got so irate. Perhaps he had previously driven into someone else and was already in trouble? Perhaps he was on his phone and didn't therefore notice you reversing? Might be helpful to see the CCTV or ask on your local social media group if anyone witnessed it.

homemadebasilpesto · 15/04/2025 22:02

godmum56 · 15/04/2025 13:27

no more than someone with a trolley loading into an open boot also in the road.

My boot doesn't encroach on the road at all and I can take up much less space than I'd need to drive out in order to get to my boot. If I had to load when my car was reversed in, I'd definitely be encroaching on the road very much.

I reverse very slowly and have all the cameras, dings and bells you need to do so safely.

asrl78 · 16/04/2025 18:46

Marmight · 15/04/2025 09:16

If he was driving forwards, he should have seen that you were already moving out of your space. He clearly didn't check and hence drove into the side of you.
The fault is with him.
Not sure if insurance would see it that way though.
He was an arse too, calling a woman a cunt many times and physically threatening you.
Doesn't matter if he has had a tough day.
No excuse.

It sounds like the OP was reversing at the time the van driver started to drive forward which would make it his fault (inadequate observation). His shitty attitude sounds to me like fight/flight response to realising he has fucked up and an attempt to deter the OP from initiating consequences. I suspect there are many people out there who believe hurling abuse at someone is a reasonable way of transferring blame.

GiveDogBone · 16/04/2025 18:49

Sounds like joint liability, as you were both moving and there was no established right of way. However without witnesses could get messy.

It could boil down to where the damage is. If the front of his van hit the side of your car then you were established. If the back of your car hit the side of his then he was established. If it was point to point, then I’d tell your insurance company it was 50:50.

And yes you need to tell your insurance company otherwise you could invalidate your insurance if you have a more serious accident.

faerietales · 16/04/2025 18:50

It sounds like the OP was reversing at the time the van driver started to drive forward which would make it his fault

Without witnesses and with it being in a car park, it will probably just go 50/50.

StarkleLittleTwink · 16/04/2025 20:05

I get really pee’d off with these huge German cars taking up small parking spaces in car parks. They are a menace! They stick out and drivers of smaller cars can’t see to get out from alongside them. They take up
space on small roads and generally appear intimidating. Sorry if I’ve offended a lot of posters but that’s how I feel. No wonder people collide with them!

Mere1 · 16/04/2025 20:32

DinoLil · 15/04/2025 08:59

Which is why you should always reverse into a space so you can drive out forwards and see what is going on.

Police advice is not to reverse in to spaces as car thieves prefer to drive straight out. Or that was their advice to us after recovering our stolen vehicle.

KiriG · 17/04/2025 09:05

You need to stop and exchange details after any collisions with cars/people/farm animals. If it’s a building or animal I guess you’d ring the police but normally only necessary if there’s a road obstruction by a crashed car or an apparently intoxicated driver.

Unfortunately you’re at fault legally if you collide with a stationary vehicle. I drive into a huge car parked on a double yellow line blocking a junction as another car was trying to enter the road and I tried to move out of be way into the car that wasn’t supposed to be there.

Often with minor damage if you talk to the driver or leave a note they let you off insurance claim or even covering costs

Manypets · 17/04/2025 13:56

Used to work in claims:

1: any witnesses
2: If the damage is your wheel arch (and not your back corner) it indicates you started reversing before he started moving.

If you had witnesses you would be in a better position. Take photos if the damage. Report it anyway. If it becomes a dispute then they will probably do 50/50 as its not going to be a massive claim and when it comes to renewal they will cane you further which from a business point of view is a winner..unless you get a really hot claims person who will want to see photos of damage to each vehicle. If its his front pass side and your wheel arch it screams he moved after you..but without witnesses could be disputed and is one of those things.

BizzyLizzyandLittleMo · 17/04/2025 14:02

I think he was in the wrong because of where the damage is. However, as an aside add to all those people saying you should always, always reverse into a space - what do you do at the supermarket? I always tend to drive in on those occasions as do most other people I see parking otherwise you have to try and manoeuvre big shopping bags between two closely parked cars in order to get to the boot which in itself runs the risk of damaging either or both cars. I do prefer to reverse park myself as it’s more difficult to reverse out safely but for a big shop I always drive in. I’m thinking the supermarkets need to change their carpark designs 🤔

Wingedharpy · 17/04/2025 14:46

I'm just here to point out that the work's van had reverse parked in to his space - as recommended by the "always reverse park" fans - didn't help him avoid an accident though.

Ilovemyshed · 17/04/2025 15:32

If he wasn’t moving, then I would say you were at fault. If he was then 50:50.

report to insurers I’m afraid!