To be a bit envious of this lifestyle? (USA)

[ThePinkPonyClub]

I've just watched School Swap: UK to USA on Channel 4 and have ended up feeling a teensy bit jealous of the kind of lifestyle that's possible over there.

Even normal, non wealthy families seemed to be able to live really outdoorsy lifestyles where they can hike and hunt and boat amongst the gorgeous scenery. I feel like in the UK, even rurally it isn't possible as everywhere is so densely populated especially when the weather is nice. The weather is also a limiting factor!

I'm obviously not jealous of the MAGA/Trump craziness or the crappy healthcare and all the rest of the political stuff but purely the lifestyle side of things, it seems so much more possible to live in that free, outdoorsy kind of way.

And the schools seemed to have a much more positive, enthusiastic culture with things like school sports and dances, compared to the UK teens in their drab uniforms staring at their phones the whole time in their miserable, run down secondary school.

aibu? Anyone live this kind of life in the UK? If so, where?!

Duplication of management and oversight is good to cut, but them also cutting hundreds if not thousands of administrative posts from trusts is ignorant and pretty ludicrous- but looks good in the papers doesn't it! Ah yes the old NHS we must accept scraps and the fact it's largely failing currently because other countries are different. Reality is whether people on here believe it or not is that the majority of Americans can access healthcare, and it is superior.

Not superior at all for the very reasons listed below.

The NHS is far from scraps. It’s bloody amazing. Yes It’s not perfect and constantly needs to evolve but looking at what it delivers it’s something we are very lucky to have and I will be forever grateful.

What this thread is mostly showing me is that it is great that many people have the freedom and ability to move countries to find something they like. My own life is infinitely better here in Scotland than it was in the states (lived in the states until I was 25 and been in Scotland 20 years now). The things my friends and family have that I don’t are fine, and the things I have that they don’t are important to me. Sounds like plenty have found the same in moving the reverse direction.

I lived in America with good insurance, with bad insurance and with no insurance and am well aware of how that feels. Leaving aside my feelings about contributing to a society that is as individualistic as America is, I do think ‘my’ kids would have better access to health care ‘if’ we had good insurance, but there’s always a chance of being one of the roughly 9% of Americans with no insurance at all. That is not a risk I am comfortable with so I choose this life. And I’m happy to pay my taxes to support what we benefit from
here.

on the original point of the post, I just don’t see that at all. I grew up in new York and there was no open space or hiking or anywhere you could really be alone. Or at least nothing accessible to me. I did some driving trips with my now husband in our 20s and saw some national parks and such - hopefully not getting destroyed now as they were beautiful. But it involved booking things and driving and planning. Where I live now there are parks and woods in every direction and my family is regularly alone on a beautiful beach or in the woods - all within 15 minutes of my front door. So I can see lots of things that might be better for a specific person in the states, but I can’t work out how access to the outdoors makes it on the list.

Or they were all actors, perhaps? I did get a major Truman Show vibe a lot of the time. I had this persistent mental image of them going behind the scenery (a lot of the buildings look like scenery) and peeling off the huge fake dayglo smiles like Mickey Mouse taking off his head at Disney.

That grateful attitude is partly why its in the pan though, just because it's free at point of use we should be fighting for it but most just shut down any criticism because they're grateful to have the concept in place. Having worked within in for many years (thankfully now escaped) know better than most the deep rooted issues that are getting worse.

But that's what I'm saying - in the UK we don't (all of us) think of quality of life as being about money and what you "can get".

Jealous of WHAT? (Excluding materialistic answers). A country that's sleepwalking into fascist dictatorship? Two weeks' holiday and no mat leave? The risk of medical bankruptcy? Vicious sexism and a relentless obsession with race? Being in a place where nothing's more than 250 years old? (That was the worst one, for me - it made me feel cut off from humanity, history, life itself). It's a very interesting place to visit (and NYC is amazing, for as long as you can afford it), but I left with a lot of sympathy for the poor sods who are there all the time.

Not shutting down criticism, you seem to be shutting down praise. As I said it’s not perfect and constantly needs to evolve- which it is.

It’s still amazing. It’s funny how expats who come back in old age embrace the NHS and sing it’s praises then.

As others have said, look at other countries like France, Germany, Austria, Sweden, Canada, NZ (and I'm sure there are many others) - with an outdoors lifestyle, more space, decent politicians (at the moment anyway), relatively healthy national budgets which support municipal facilities and far less tendency to school shootings etc. Yes they have problems of racism and much more in those places but don't let the English-speaking movie-industry cliché lure you into believing the USA is the only alternative to the UK.

Sheep farmers are fine with walkers who keep dogs on the lead (which I always did, when I had one; always picked up after it too, and put the bag in a bin). Those are problems with owners not the dogs.

I've nothing against dog parks as such - good luck to anyone who enjoys them (I have seen signs for them in the UK once or twice). It was really just a comment on the thing that seems to be common in the US, where exercise of any kind is sort of made into a separate thing from the rest of life - in a separate place, and probably with a special outfit, and probably involving handing over some money at some point. Go to the gym to walk on a treadmill (and bitch if you can't park close enough and have to walk another minute or two outdoors). Go to a special "park" to "hike", and use a manmade "trail" with a prescribed route. Go to a special place to exercise a dog. Such a vast country and yet the people are so often kettled into a few relatively small areas where they can enjoy it (and always with someone making money off it). The commercialisation of absolutely everything is just quite depressing to me, and the way Americans just don't seem to have a sense of collective ownership of their public spaces and their landscape. And there's this sort of atomisation of society where every possible subsection of the population seems to want to put themselves in their own little space and keep everyone else out. People with dogs here, people without there. "Nature" in its own designated area which you have to travel to get to, and absolute suppression of it everywhere else. Walkers on their little trails and everybody else in their cars and a lot of the built environment designed in such a way that you couldn't walk it if you wanted to. Rich people don't want to live anywhere near poor people. Everyone so obsessed with their individual "identity". I don't think it's doing anybody any good.

I live in Guernsey in the Channel Islands which is very outdoors, with beautiful beaches in abundance.

The only downside is that living on an island you start to go stir crazy very easily

@Elsvieta

Or they were all actors, perhaps? I did get a major Truman Show vibe a lot of the time. I had this persistent mental image of them going behind the scenery (a lot of the buildings look like scenery) and peeling off the huge fake dayglo smiles like Mickey Mouse taking off his head at Disney.

Perhaps they sensed a Brit with a massive chip on their shoulder from just another dying empire that had decided to make themselves irrelevant in the world and really put it on for you?

As I said earlier, I've spent roughly half my life in the US and half in the UK. I recognise neither the horrors nor the glory of either country as described on here. There are good things about both and bad things about both, fantastic natural sites and absolutely blighted places in both, amazing people and absolute twats in both.

I guess it's in the company you keep, because I don't know anyone this small minded and blinkered on either side of the ocean.

A country that's sleepwalking into fascist dictatorship?

*Adding: I don't disagree with you about that. It's beyond distressing. I'm sickened and horrified by it. But you might want to read a few of the political threads on here because if you're thinking smugly it can't happen here, I'd suggest you think again.

Being in a place where nothing's more than 250 years old? (That was the worst one, for me - it made me feel cut off from humanity, history, life itself).

Ah yes. The horrors. Funnily enough, we have a house in the US that's 235 years old in a lovely (blue-voting) town near the sea where everything is walkable. Meanwhile, huge segments of the UK population live in vast tracts of cheaply built new houses that have sprung up in the fields (causing environmental destruction and flood risks for existing infrastructure), underserved by GPs and local services, miles from anything, so completely dependent on (often multiple) cars.

No aspersions on people who live in those houses, but you might want to look up from kissing the foundations of history and realise that modern Britain is hardly nirvana

Not a fresh air fiend so the outdoors does not interest me.

I like green in my garden and so long as the air is clean I have no complaints.

Sorry but is this satire, "In a way, Europe isn't so culturally diverse because it's all predominantly Catholic. It also has very samey architecture." 😂

I love visiting the USA but what's to be jealous about? Really? Workers rights, sick pay and maternity benefits are shocking in the USA, the obsession with guns and race, regular school shootings....trust me I'm not jealous. There are lots of good things about the USA and I love visiting the place, parts of it are amazing, but would I ever live there? Not a cat in hells chance...

Differences, yes, are they as profound as the differences found between different countries in Europe - No!

English is the de facto language spoken in the U.S. you don't fly to a different state 2 hours away and have to speak a completely different language!

I'm not sure what's wrong with just accepting and being proud of an American culture, as that is the way the rest of the world perceives it, not just Brits, having Danish family I know that is the common perception there aswell- American culture is just that. I thought that was what this America first thing was about, i.e. The U.S. Isolationism is about America being the best in the world (as you are loyally declaring) and their interests are what are important, the culture is American, the proposition is very much a homogeneous one not that all the U.S. is different with different countries within it like in Europe.

What I find odd and disingenuous is the blind loyalty not criticism of the country you live in, even now😬 and the way it's being run. Many citizens in different countries are very critical of the governance or the culture they live in but these sorts of threads just bring out denial like, obesity is surely a concern if it is 42 % of the country but it doesn't matter about those people as we're alright Jack, kind of attitude.

the proposition is very much a homogeneous one not that all the U.S. is different with different countries within it like in Europe.

Tell me you know absolutely nothing about the US without telling me. But it’s ok I guess since you have your Danish relatives to fill in the gaps 🤷‍♀️

Is that the same as others in here waxing poetically about the service they get from the NHS when I could find pages of examples of not being able to get a GP appt… granny on a trolley in A&E, and hours long ambulance wait times with a broken hip? 🤨

No sane person would claim that either country is perfect…or even good in all things. But as another poster pointed out neither is a hellscape and there are millions of people living happy lives in both.

I suppose it's because I CHOSE to move here (in 2007 for love), and therefore, when I hear so much criticism of the US from Brits, I feel like they might as well just say to me "Hey FluentBiscuit, your life's really crap, isn't it?" They are insulting my life choices when they insult the US. I take it really personally, especially when it cost me so much heartache to leave the UK and live here. The way I feel is like, "I'm well aware of its shortcomings but I don't want to hear about it from outsiders, thank you very much!" After all, I don't come home to the UK and crow to everyone about the wonderful hot summers we have and how can they stand living in such a rainy country? It's just not the done thing. If I thought someone's country is crap - and therefore, that their life must be crap since they're living in it - I would keep it to myself. So I feel a huge urge to stick up for the US when outsiders start in on it, and there's also a shadow conversation going on which is "Isn't your life crap?" and the answer is "No, it's pretty damn good, actually!"

Now, I appreciate that this is the internet and I wouldn't expect strangers to be mindful of those feelings like I would friends or family at home, of course. I'm just explaining the psychology to you.

When I go home, if I have a meal with extended family and they start in on the US, I find it really offensive, because they don't seem to get that I live there, I like it, and they shouldn't be insulting my adopted country and my chosen life. I don't mind discussion, of course, but I have some family members that sit there and say nothing but negative things about the US, which is pretty rude considering it's my country as well as the UK is.

You haven't a clue. My company offers plenty of work rights, sick pay, and maternity benefits - much more than I would get in the UK. There is no obsession with guns where I live - I've lived here for 18 years and have never seen one - and everyone I know is very left and anti-racist and anti-homophobia. As for the school shootings, the chances of being involved with one are absolutely minuscule - kids are far, far more likely to be killed travelling to or from school.

What you're describing is life in a poor, deprived, red-state hellhole. The millions of Americans who live in more enlightened places have far, far better lives than are possible in the UK.

But you enjoy your tiny houses that cost a fortune, your miserable populace, broken NHS and train system, your samey landscape, and your cold, wet weather. 👍

P.S. I'm off to the tropics soon, to Key West, which is just a short flight from here. White sand beaches, warmth, and crystal-clear blue waters without having to even leave the country...bliss!

We get two version of this when we go back to the states (immigrated the opposite direction)

1. People who think living in Scotland is some sort of magical world where we spend our time listening to bagpipes while frolicking in a meadow.
2. People who just want to tell me long endless stories about how socialised medicine is the root of all evil

Sometimes, oddly these people overlap and we have a confusing chat about how Scotland is both magical AND terrible.

But do they sit there and insult Scotland up and down and three ways to Sunday, and you're supposed to just nod and agree that your life is complete crap since you live in this terrible place?

The Brits were very down on the US years before Trump. The middle classes are especially bad for looking down their noses at the US. It's all jealousy.

What are you actually disputing though, that there is not an American culture, it is one country, that's how Americans talk about it themselves i.e America is the best, we are this, we are that. 'cultural homogenisation' is far more evident in one country, it's a description in comparison to Europe which doesn't have one culture as it is not one country- these are just facts. Your politicians ar championing the rights of the American people as not the rights of many, different and disparate states. This is why I was responding to the poster who was disengeously suggesting that European cultures are less diverse than the U.S and some silly remark about the architecture being the same across the whole of Europe - tell me you don't know anything about Architecture without telling me you don't know anything about Architecture!

Why would my Danish relatives do that, English is not their first language so they probably see the Notion of an American culture as being that of the country more so than your average Brit would?

that's how Americans talk about it themselves i.e America is the best, we are this, we are that. '

All Americans? Rightio.