Holiday bedrooms

[GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing]

Not really an AIBU but a WWYD

If you were a single Mum and had a 11 yo DS and a 16 yo DD, who didn’t want to share together on holiday, but you could only afford a two bed place, which child would you share a twin room with, and which would you give the double room?

Neither room will be horrible, I don’t mind sharing with either of them. 11 yo has ADHD.

It’s only three nights in the UK but getting three rooms isn’t an option.

Feels like the wrong message to give the big room to the younger, male child, but equally if it was a dad with a 16 yo DS and 11 yo DD it would be a no brained to give the girl their own room!

Edit - I’d be happy to give either one the run of the twin room during the day and would only sleep there

My ds 16 has ASD... Holiday is more successful if he has his own room.
My adult dd shares with ds 10 happily so far every year!!
In your shoes I would share with dd...

That’s where I’m erring but hate the idea of signaling “boys get the best things”. I might be over thinking!

I'd share with the 11yo, but then I still share with my adult son when we travel together.

I think this really does depend on the children and their needs, not their age or sex, if that makes sense. I’m also a single parent with two children. For years I always shared with the older one, because he tended to be ‘needier’, especially at bedtime and overnight. Now he tends to have long lies ins so I give him the closest thing to a ‘bedroom’ and younger DS and I share the ‘living room’ area of accommodation.

Unless I’m 100% sure of layout before we get there, I also tell them that I don’t know where they’re sleeping until we arrive and that my decision will be final! This new rule was introduced the year one of them tried to claim the ‘best’ space then sulked when they didn’t get it.

I'd share with your DD

I'd share with the younger child, so in this case your DS.

Do either of them feel strongly either way?

If one cares about sharing and the other doesn’t then share with the one that doesn’t.

If both/neither care, draw lots to make it fair?

Three nights? Three people?

We would play musical beds…

Either. I share with any of my male and female adult DC. They are all fine with it, boys (well men) included.

To be honest, I'd probably have them share!

But if you don't want to do that, and they would both like their own room, then I would toss a coin!

We have family holidays often. Huge cottages... We take turns for example with the en suite room...maybe tell dd she can have first choice next trip? Adult dd has shared a twin room with her db or a double bed with a dsis plenty of times... It's about the holiday not the bed spaces ime!! Nobody complains..

I think it depends on your 11-year-old, really. Some 11-year-old boys are very much still little boys. Other 11-year-old boys are much more like teenagers.

If he's a 'young' 11 then I'd share with him. If he isn't, I'd share with the older daughter.

If it's one bedroom one living room , DS(13) and I share the bedroom and DD (16) has the sofa bed. If it's all in one room DS and I share the double bed and DD has the single bed. If it's 2 bedrooms I have the master and DS and DD share. DS and I sharing is a hangover from the many, many years when he climbed into my bed every night, so it would have been pointless giving him his own room. DD prefers her own space. Do what works for your family.

Honestly I would make them share - or no holiday - it’s a bed to sleep in

or

girl in with you as assume female

if was a dad I would say boy in with dad

I think the teenager should have their own room. Their sex is irrelevant.

Share with your daughter.

Same in our family, husband shares with son (10) and I share with daughter (3)

Thanks everyone!

So the overall consensus I’m getting is “it doesn’t really matter” 😂😂

I’m a bit of an overthinker so will either draw lots or see a much one feels more strongly!

Boys get the best things?!?! What if the DD gets it? Are you signalling girls get the best things?…. You’re definitely overthinking it because that is just silly.

Which child would you feel more comfortable being left in a room alone?

It kind of is but they’re also getting a big holiday with their dad

Sorry it’s not a hotel it’s a lodge/ cottage type place. So everyone comfortable.

I get that we neither sex should “get the best things” but society obviously gives men/ boys a lot of privileges already.

Swap half way through?