Page 14 | Blue badge police again

Rainburstflowers · 2025-04-11T08:00:23+00:00

Name changes for this as I do every so often. I have blue badge but my disability is not visible. For the 3rs time in 2 weeks I have been challenged about not looking disabled and I am fed up of explaining myself yesterday got out the car and this man came charging towards me shouting “oi you don’t have a blue badge”. I sighed and said “yes I do”. He then said “where did you nick that from?” I said “I didn’t nick it from anyone I got it off eBay” He then looked at me and said “oh right and walked off” as if that was then ok!!!! or it could be my built like a brick shithouse husband opened his door and got out the drivers seat. I know I should not have said the eBay comment but I am fed up of explaining myself. if anyone has any good comebacks please let me know

Cesarina · 12/04/2025 18:33

Herewegoagainandagainandagain · 11/04/2025 13:17

I loathe the toilet police.

My adult niece had UC and after an ileostomy now has a stoma. It is hard enough for a young woman to have to deal with having a bag and the other very personal changes to her body without being regularly challenged, by the general public, but most frequently by staff in the venue, for using accessible toilets.

The toilet police don't just ask, when she replies she is eligible to use them, they continue to challenge with the usual stupid comments such as you don't look disabled etc until she gets upset to the point she flashes her stoma at them before they will back down.

She is feisty so when she comes out she will ask to speak to the staff member and their manager and make sure they know the impact it has on her, and she gets an apology, later she will write to their HQ to complain. But it affects her day and knocks her confidence going out just a little bit more every time it happens.

Once she used a normal toilet because the accessible was in use/there was a queue and her bag was leaking - not ideal as she needs access to a sink too. She ended up with banging on the door and being shouted at to open the door now because a staff member had been in another cubicle/heard rustling as she sorted herself out, went and got a 2nd staff member and accused her of shop lifting. Again she had to share her private medical information to satisfy them.

Blue badge / toilet police really need to check themselves. Is it really worth the impact it has on genuinely disabled people?

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I know this thread is about Blue Badges, but this post about accessible toilets prompts me to post.
I used to think that nobody could use an accessible toilet unless they had a disability, which I thought was fair enough.
Even 'though there would often be queues for "normal" loos, with the accessible loo being vacant.
On a training course some years ago, about the 2010 Equality Act, accessible loos were discussed.
I was surprised to learn that anyone can use an accessible loo, but only if there isn't a disabled person waiting, as they take priority.
So next time you have crossed legs in a loo queue, if the accessible loo isn't needed by a disabled person, you can lawfully use it.

asrl78 · 12/04/2025 18:34

Tessasanderson · 11/04/2025 09:44

I can never understand blue badge holders moaning about this. Can they not see that the person doing the asking is trying to protect the blue badge holders right to that space?

In the current society there are not many people who will actually put themselves out for whats right and wrong. See someone getting beaten up, turn away. See someone stealing, turn away. See someone parking in a disabled space to protect their Range Rover, turn away.

So once in a while they get it wrong and ask someone with a not obvious disability if they are genuine. Is that such a hardship for someone actually having some social concerns?

Or maybe they just start to wonder if its worth it, ignore it all and let blue badge holders cry about lack of parking in future because no one gives a stuff.

This is a good point. Unfortunately with the number of entitled dickheads in society who think anything goes if they can get away with it, people who otherwise have a moral compass are getting fed up of the behaviour of the dickheads and are now calling them out. It does mean occasionally that unwarranted calling-outs happen and no-one should ever question someone who has a blue badge, but this is the price we pay for having dick heads in society. Vent your frustration at the provocation (entitled tossers who can't be bothered to walk a few more meters), not the retaliation (people who challenge apparent abuse of disabled spaces).

JungAtHeart · 12/04/2025 18:35

I’ve lost count of the number of times people have demanded to see my blue badge! It’s horrible. I refuse to engage with them …

Tonkie18 · 12/04/2025 18:37

I’ve not had this yet but it scares me so much that I only use my badge on really bad days or if there’s no spaces. But I shouldn’t have to feel like that. I’m so scared of being challenged. I also don’t want to take the space from someone more ‘disabled’ than me. I have Rheumatoid/Lupus, osteoarthritis for the last 12 years (I’m 37), asthma, angioedema, severe reynaulds, chronic tendinitis and tensonyvitis, urticaria and a handful of MH issues. Some days I look like Quasimodo with my face all blown up.. some days I don’t. I really don’t like confrontation so I try not to use the spaces and hobble from miles away 😭

my son also has cerebral palsy (mild) and epilepsy and doesn’t look disabled.. but again I’m scared to use the spaces because I’ve heard of the nasty things people say 😞

LadyKenya · 12/04/2025 18:37

Squarecobra · 12/04/2025 18:17

A friend of mine was parked in a disabled bay at a supermarket and we were stood chatting as she loaded the car. There was a woman impatiently looking and waiting for her to move so she could have the space. What she didn’t see was although she had her 4 kids with her and she, herself, is not classed as disabled, her eldest daughter has many less obvious issues and qualifies for a blue badge. As such, she was entitled to park in either a disabled bay or a parent child space but the other woman didn’t seem to give a hoot.

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It sounds like she was just waiting for the space though. I have had the same thing happen, Someone waiting for me to leave, and I exit the BB space as soon as I am able to.

Herewegoagainandagainandagain · 12/04/2025 18:38

Cesarina · 12/04/2025 18:33

I know this thread is about Blue Badges, but this post about accessible toilets prompts me to post.
I used to think that nobody could use an accessible toilet unless they had a disability, which I thought was fair enough.
Even 'though there would often be queues for "normal" loos, with the accessible loo being vacant.
On a training course some years ago, about the 2010 Equality Act, accessible loos were discussed.
I was surprised to learn that anyone can use an accessible loo, but only if there isn't a disabled person waiting, as they take priority.
So next time you have crossed legs in a loo queue, if the accessible loo isn't needed by a disabled person, you can lawfully use it.

Show quote history

No idea if you can lawfully or not but morally anyone who used one, potentially meaning someone who needed it urgently couldn't, would be an arsehole.

Fioratourer · 12/04/2025 18:39

My answer would be well you could contact my gp to find out why but they won’t tell you either because it’s confidential!! I’m annoyed for you op.

Lovelysausagedogscrumpy · 12/04/2025 18:40

Cesarina · 12/04/2025 18:33

I know this thread is about Blue Badges, but this post about accessible toilets prompts me to post.
I used to think that nobody could use an accessible toilet unless they had a disability, which I thought was fair enough.
Even 'though there would often be queues for "normal" loos, with the accessible loo being vacant.
On a training course some years ago, about the 2010 Equality Act, accessible loos were discussed.
I was surprised to learn that anyone can use an accessible loo, but only if there isn't a disabled person waiting, as they take priority.
So next time you have crossed legs in a loo queue, if the accessible loo isn't needed by a disabled person, you can lawfully use it.

Show quote history

The disabled person doesn’t take priority in the queue though. Which I find odd. If no-one has priority why have them at all ?

LadyKenya · 12/04/2025 18:40

Johnthesensible · 12/04/2025 18:21

As long as you are using your own blue badge, then no one has any complaints. I certainly took issue with one bloke in a suit at Tesco. Expensive BMW. 'Hidden disabilities mate'. I said where is your blue badge then. 'I forget things'. I reported them. A month or so later his car was there again but parked further away as it was busy. There were plenty of disabled spaces.

There lies the problem. As long as people like him exist, you can expect people to question those who are visibly walking around unaided. Don't forget also that some are refused blue badges. My neighbour can hardly walk. They have all manner of issues. Blue badge refused. Their daughter does report anyone who has no blue badge displayed. You can understand why and those who walk fine and parked in a disabled spot.

Instead of questioning why some complain about you in a disabled spot, ask yourself why they are complaining.

You honestly remembered his car a month later? Wow.

KiriG · 12/04/2025 18:40

If they are concerned then they should get a job in parking enforcement.

Genuinely disabled people may become anxious to park in case of being challenged and it isn’t fair. Imagine you don’t look disabled but every time you go to the supermarket maybe more than one person not only challenges you but may use abusive language. You’d soon do home delivery. And maybe that’s the only time they leave the house, maybe being sworn at is the only social contact they have.

So butt out, or you will be doing more harm than good. After all, genuine idiots using disabled spaces don’t care. Not forgetting the few people desperate to park and as a one off have used a disabled space. Leave them alone because believe it or not telling someone off for using a parking space they aren’t entitled to is as rude as using it and most times there are vacant doable spaces left.

NoWittyNamesAvailable · 12/04/2025 18:42

My son has a blue badge, we haven't been challenged on using it but i have had looks. A mum and 3 able bodies kids getting out of the car makes people look twice. But he has autism and adhd, he is unpredictable and impulsive. He can be a danger to himself and others when there are cars about, he darts off without a seconds notice. He also has dyspraxia, his coordination, motor skills and balance are on the 0.5th centile which means he has significant difficulty and needs the extra space to move around. I don't think people realise how much you have to prove in order to be eligible to get a blue badge.

I dread to think what would happen if someone challenged us, I'd probably cry because I'm so exhausted. I'm trying to store some of these come backs just in case.

Lovelysausagedogscrumpy · 12/04/2025 18:44

asrl78 · 12/04/2025 18:34

This is a good point. Unfortunately with the number of entitled dickheads in society who think anything goes if they can get away with it, people who otherwise have a moral compass are getting fed up of the behaviour of the dickheads and are now calling them out. It does mean occasionally that unwarranted calling-outs happen and no-one should ever question someone who has a blue badge, but this is the price we pay for having dick heads in society. Vent your frustration at the provocation (entitled tossers who can't be bothered to walk a few more meters), not the retaliation (people who challenge apparent abuse of disabled spaces).

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There are parking wardens and police. If they have a mind to police blue badge spaces then disabled people have an obligation to comply. Joe Public not so much. I don’t hold with the theory that disabled people should be grateful that arseholes take it on themselves to pry in this way. If you see someone parking in a disabled bay without a badge, then fair enough. But if there is a current badge on display there is no reason to challenge - it’s no-one elses’ business and ‘you don’t look very disabled’ is not a reason to challenge.

Gettingbysomehow · 12/04/2025 18:45

TigerRag · 11/04/2025 10:08

Would you be happy for someone to accuse you of faking your disability? Because that's what it really is - they can't see it therefore you're in their eyes lying

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It's got to the point where I avoid going out because of these morons and have basically become confined to my house. My blue badge is visible in my windscreen with my photo in it. I don't hide it.
I have enough to deal with with my disability and chronic pain without people shouting at me on the occasion I have no choice but to go out so no it's not okay for whatever reason.
They are not the blue badge police. If they think I am a faker they can write down my registration number and report it, there is absolutely no reason to humiliate me in the street.

Comicalblackcat · 12/04/2025 18:47

As a BB holder I get very annoyed with Sainsbury’s that puts mother/children parking before the disabled, I was told by a member of staff that BB holders could also use those places so decided to test it out and I got screamed at by a mother who asked if I was blind and couldn’t read what was marked on the floor.
i don’t shop at Sainsbury’s now.

FeetLikeFlippers · 12/04/2025 18:48

The eBay comment was genius - I often find that aggressive people and bullies don’t expect their challenges to be met with humour and it just confuses the hell out of them. They are usually looking to either intimidate you or start an argument, and humour shows that you’re not going to play ball either way. I don’t have a blue badge because my invisible disability prevents me from driving but I do have a Disabled Persons Railcard and have never had anything but kindness from the station and train staff when they see it, in fact they often ask if I need any additional help with anything. But I’m definitely going to save up the eBay and Stephen Hawking responses in case I ever need them!

ClearHoldBuild · 12/04/2025 18:50

Tessasanderson · 11/04/2025 09:44

I can never understand blue badge holders moaning about this. Can they not see that the person doing the asking is trying to protect the blue badge holders right to that space?

In the current society there are not many people who will actually put themselves out for whats right and wrong. See someone getting beaten up, turn away. See someone stealing, turn away. See someone parking in a disabled space to protect their Range Rover, turn away.

So once in a while they get it wrong and ask someone with a not obvious disability if they are genuine. Is that such a hardship for someone actually having some social concerns?

Or maybe they just start to wonder if its worth it, ignore it all and let blue badge holders cry about lack of parking in future because no one gives a stuff.

Shall I ask them personal questions that are none of my business? Unless they’re a parking attendant or the police they don’t need to concern themselves with who’s parking where. If they have a genuine concern find someone in an official capacity to ask.

LadyKenya · 12/04/2025 18:52

Comicalblackcat · 12/04/2025 18:47

As a BB holder I get very annoyed with Sainsbury’s that puts mother/children parking before the disabled, I was told by a member of staff that BB holders could also use those places so decided to test it out and I got screamed at by a mother who asked if I was blind and couldn’t read what was marked on the floor.
i don’t shop at Sainsbury’s now.

I have on occasion parked in a P&C space, if the BB spaces are full. As long as my BB is displayed, I don't care what anybody thinks. It is a shame to let that woman put you off parking in your Sainsburys. She was being unreasonable, and rude.

TheAutumnCrow · 12/04/2025 18:57

NeverDropYourMooncup · 12/04/2025 18:13

It's a version of the Nice Guy (TM), isn't it? Look at me, haranguing disabled women, children and men that don't look as though they'd be able to put me flat on my self righteous arse challenging potential fraudsters in defence of the poor little Disableds.

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Yes, which is why they scarper like cowards when my DP appears pushing the trolley he's just fetched for me to walk with. They don't want to take DP on but they're happy to be weirdos with me.

Orangemintcream · 12/04/2025 19:08

LadyKenya · 12/04/2025 18:52

I have on occasion parked in a P&C space, if the BB spaces are full. As long as my BB is displayed, I don't care what anybody thinks. It is a shame to let that woman put you off parking in your Sainsburys. She was being unreasonable, and rude.

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Apparently the shopping centre near me doesn’t allow this. It’s actually on their website.

No idea how it works legally.

ImABitchImALover · 12/04/2025 19:10

I have an invisible disability too, and just yesterday had a man question me as I came out of one of the disabled toilets that literally had the ‘not every disability is visible’ sign on

He was with his (I presume) wife who was in a wheelchair and said ‘oh so we’ve had to wait for someone who doesn’t even need this toilet’

i said, I am well within my rights to use this toilet. And he said, ‘you don’t look very bloody disabled to me’!

I said, ‘you don’t look illiterate but you clearly can’t read a f’kin sign’ and tapped the sign on the door

he stared me down as I walked off so I flashed him my ileostomy bag as I left, wishing it had still been full!

when will people learn to keep their traps shut!!

RubyTuesdayFTO · 12/04/2025 19:19

Ive only been challenged twice but it’s made me so nervous of using it. Judgemental looks from older people are another matter - they happen all the time. My BB is for me but my autistic child (overweight, wearing ear defenders) once got out of the car with me and an old man shouted how disgusting that us we were using a disabled space for a “lazy child”. I couldn’t answer but just pulled up my trousers to show my knee replacement scars. His wife apologised. I’m not in receipt of any other benefits and the badge allows me to work. It’s ok people saying ignore the BB police but I find it mortifying.

Holldstock1 · 12/04/2025 19:21

This totally. Its the people who park in disabled bays without a blue badge or parent & child bays when they don't have children that are the issue. It annoys me when I see that.

I have a blue badge myself now as I have mobility issues and am either using a walker or a wheelchair, so its pretty obvious Ive got problems. Thats probably why Ive not personally been challenged.

But as its been said before the blue badge could be for a condition thats not visually obvious. I think those challenging people with blue badges should save their ire for those who very obviously dont have one.

Id very happily tell someone that I have a type of Muscular Dystrophy and hopefully make them think twice before doing that again. But not everyone is happy or confident to call a stranger out for being a bully.

Clueless1978 · 12/04/2025 19:26

I get it all the time too I have colon cancer, I just say I’m terminal and got 2 weeks to live! You want to see there utter shock I’m fed up of explaining now

Lilywc · 12/04/2025 19:26

The eBay one was perfect!!

NeverDropYourMooncup · 12/04/2025 19:28

I think this thread can be summarised as follows:

Non-disabled BBP: We're doing it to fight injustice

Disabled People: It's really unpleasant to be on the receiving end of it, please don't

Non-disabled BBP: We have A MORAL COMPASS you know

Disabled People: Just shove your moral compass up your arse