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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to wish that a few more MN's had seen my thread today......

306 replies

Pixiepants · 15/05/2008 19:47

Here and then taking advantage of the AIBU threads to see if I can drum up a bit more support for this subject?

I probably am, but hey.....

OP posts:
differentID · 16/05/2008 18:33

The Four most commonly heard comments from customers

  1. He's old enough now, he's 6/7/8/9 months. So which car seat does he go in next ? Is it that one?(Customer points to high back booster)
  2. His feet touch the back of the car- he's too long for it now (Child commonly has half the length of the seat to grow before his head gets anywhere near the top)
  3. He gets bored facing the back( then get him something to play with on journey)
  4. I can't loosen the straps any more and he's all squashed in.( Child in question is 6 months old and is wearing what appears to be 5 layers of clothes. Advise customer to take outer layers off, response is usually "but he'll get cold". (This was just over a fortnight ago by the way)I just wanted to reply better a cold baby than a badly injured one, but I bit my tongue just in time- the customer didn't seem to realise she could speak to me quietly and had talked at me rather than with me the whole time)
These are just the commonest ones. No I agree not all parents want to go forward facing, but the vast majority of people whom I speak to on a daily basis, do. Those who keep their little ones rear facing for as long as possible are to be commended, and I will always say to them if they are little unsure that they have done the best for their children by keeping them rear facing. I agree that maybe if group 1 rear facing seats became common, the G-B-P would accept them more but would then moan about the price
Original poster
Pixiepants · 16/05/2008 19:02

Diff.id that is so scarey....there are alot of very ill informed people out there. You sound very good at your job and it sounds so frustrating at times.

Regarding the price, would there really be a massive difference once the export and then re-importing and delivery costs are taken away? I don't know which is most popular at the moment, but people who are choosing the 'safest' in Mothercare are paying around £180 I think. That's £20 less than a rearfacing....(Still alot of money I know, but there are many many ways to cost cut with children and for me this isn't one of them)

OP posts:
FairyMum · 16/05/2008 19:14

rearfacing car seats are produced here in the UK, but not sold in the UK as I understand it. Its exported to the Scandinavian market from the uk, but they don't think its a market for them here. I agree the British public is generally really hard to educate. They often have this thing about the "nanny state" and I think would ignore the facts and thinks "health and safety gone mad" or blame Gordon Brown. Oh, I don't know. Just seems the British public is very suspicious when it comes to being informed.

silverfrog · 16/05/2008 19:17

But so many people do cost cut for car seats.

We use Isofix seats, and the number of people who have said to me "oh, but they're so expensive" while I just sit there and smile sweetly (and cancel all thoughts of a night out any time soon due to high cost of car seat)

I aree with you, Pixiepants, for me this is not an area that I will compromise on.

For us, using isofix actually worked out well, as we bought the britax infant carrier and base, and then dd1's rear facing 9-18kg seat fitted on to the same base, so we just needed to buy a new seat unit (half the cost)

differentID · 16/05/2008 19:36

The main issue, I think, is the fact that because so few people are aware these items exist, even fewer are prepared to purchase them. Because it isn't legally required, the vast majority of people (sheep, I say) are only willing to do the minimum required by law, and even then they begrudge it.
If the rear facing ones became more readily available, and company's became less scared of customers reactions to being told the plain truth then maybe, just maybe, change could be effected.
Personally, I believe that it should be a legal requirement for all parents-to-be to have as part of their ante-natal instruction a session on infant safety- focusing on car and travel safety. even if it's just one extra half hour session where the reasons behind the thinking could be explained. That's where the problem lies. Spoon feeding information is dangerous- people should be discussing cause and effect and I don't believe lectures are an effective way of disseminating vital information. Unfortunately time and budget constraints on midwives and health visitors mean that many unsure parents don't ask or feel unable to ask questions about things like this- especially if they are feeling particularly vulnerable and may be too shy to approach a confident sales adviser.

FairyMum · 16/05/2008 19:44

In sweden we have road safety organisations who advice on these things. Its just simple facts and recommendations. You will not be taken out and shot in Sweden if you have a forward facing seat, although I am not sure if they are readily available to buy because everyone knows what is safest. I do think advice and recommendations are often perceived as lecturing in this country though.

differentID · 16/05/2008 19:47

I totally agree with that last comment. Brits do tend to just go at things bull-headed and resent "being told what to do"

MrsAki · 16/05/2008 19:53

Hi FairyMum!
In Sweden, if a shop starts to sell forward facing seat, the work group that looks at car safety (the leader is one of my main sources of information) will go to the shop in question and take the seats of the shelves. But as more and more people buy car seats online and forward facing seats are cheaper ... well, I don't need to continue do I? Some people are idiots.

Original poster
Pixiepants · 16/05/2008 19:55

Completely agree with Diff, and FairyMum and hope that the original point of this thread, to make the choice available, is coming across as such.

I'm currently trying to get our road safety officer more involved and agree it would be a really good way forward.

OP posts:
chonky · 16/05/2008 19:58

Hi Pixiepants - I'm a fellow rear car seat user (well dd was - she's now outgrown hers). We went to the In Car Safety Centre in MK as they were recommended to us; dd has CP and I felt she didn't have enough head control to be forward facing at nine months.

I'm now a total convert - the car seat was soooo much better locked down to the car than any forward facing seat we've used.

I agree it's madness that these seats aren't more freely available. Will sign your petition

Original poster
Pixiepants · 16/05/2008 20:09

Thanks chonky, but can't take credit for the petition...thats MrsAki.

Hoping positive comments like yours will encourage a few more people to approach shops and manufactures requesting them to supply them as well as forward facing.

OP posts:
MrsAki · 16/05/2008 20:34

In reply to SaintGeorge who think the wording is wrong. I am at the moment changing all mentions of "stage" to "group" on the rearfacing website. I can't change the petition, so I have 3 alternative suggestions for you.

  1. Just sign it anyway and then let the matter go.
  2. Create a new petition with better wording and post us the link. I will sign your petition as well.
  3. Ignore the petition completely.

I agree with Pixiepants and others that the wider picture is the important thing here, i.e. to keep our children safe in the car. If the wording is such a problem to you that it gets on your nerves, just don't look at it.

MrsAki · 16/05/2008 20:35

BTW, we have 205 signatures. Way to go ladies!!

SaintGeorge · 16/05/2008 20:40

I was trying to helpfully point out that the wording is incorrect and that Downing Street use every excuse they can to reject petitions.

My kids are way past child seats, it is not a campaign close enough to my heart for me to reword a petition for you.

Next time, I won't bother to offer my help.

Original poster
Pixiepants · 16/05/2008 20:44

Brilliant MrsAki , and, as I like to keep the peace....Appreciate that you took the time to point out the finer details SaintGeorge. I know sometimes, very sadly, these factors can get in the way of progress.

OP posts:
Original poster
Pixiepants · 16/05/2008 20:45

x-post...

OP posts:
swallowsandamazons · 16/05/2008 20:49

Loving this thread. We have a rear faceing seat for our DS he is now 2.9, we got it from Volvo, and found out about it from some junk mail that volvo sent us, so they are trying to get the message out there. The chaps at Volvo fitted it for us, so we know that it is correctly fitted too. They go on a course about the seat where they get to wear a helmet that makes their heads the same weight as a babies, which is about 25% of their weight, and the chap told me that he could hardly lift his head, now imagine that being thrown forward in a crash. We have no trouble with DS travelling in it, he has a forward facing seat in our LR, so he knows you can travel the other way, and as for some of the comments about where their legs go, i am pleased to tell you that my son has knees and is not afraid to use them, The seat was not that much more money than the forward facing seat either unless you buy the volvo to go with it as we did!!! Go buy one today.

MrsAki · 16/05/2008 20:56

And I am just trying to be helpful by informing parents in this country that their children could travel safer in the car. I could not have bothered and just got my own child a mega safe seat and not given a flying monkey about anyone else but instead I spent every night in front of my computer, writing leaflets, updating my website, writing to experts, manufacturers, road safety officers, parent organisations, newspapers, authorities and the like to try to make sure that your children and grandchildren are as safe in the car as my little monkey. I do appreciate your help and as I said, I am now changing the wording on my whole website, but they way you said it, it didn't sound like helpfulness.
Enough about that. I send you kisses for correcting me. I will never say stage again when I mean group.

suzi2 · 16/05/2008 20:56

Silverfrog, my DD is tiny too. She's 15 months but 18.5 lbs and 71cm tall. She's had a growth spurt lately lol.

Pixiepants, I think the road safety officer thing is a good idea. I might drop mine an email and ask his thoughts on the subject and if he has any ideas.

And when it comes to DDs time, I think a trip to the Volvo garage might be necessary.

MrsAki · 16/05/2008 20:58

Mental note to self ? start reading posts through and correct spelling before pressing Post Message. Bad poster! Sorry guys.

silverfrog · 16/05/2008 21:15

Don't know how tall my dd2 is, suzi2, but I suspect not very!

At this rate, she will still be rear facing in dd1 old volvo seat until she's well over 5...

actually, just looked it up - if she continues on the (non)centile that she's on, she will be about 8.5 when she reaches 18kg

suzi2 · 16/05/2008 21:21

lol, my DD has just got back onto the charts for height a few weeks ago. She used to be a chubby thing but hasn't gained weight in 6 months at least. DS was similar, and at 2.9 is probably only just out of the height restriction for the 0+ seat. Though I moved him to forward facing at a year as I didn't know much better.

Original poster
Pixiepants · 16/05/2008 21:43

Just wanted to put this on here too.

OP posts:
MissHH · 16/05/2008 23:10

I think that TV appearance was great :D

I hope MrsAki gets trough to the politicians with the petition(and that many more will sign it)!

hunkermunker · 16/05/2008 23:23

StG was helping, politely, as far as I saw.

Amazing (well, depressing) - the rearfacing campaign is meeting similar prejudices and "oh ffs nanny state" stuff bf supporters come across.