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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Staying in €500pn hotel

54 replies

Angrysadluxury · 09/04/2025 22:30

Would rather be at home with my cats than in this wanky hotel with my DP. Hate these over-priced places. Just finished a 6 course meal with paired wines. €110 each. Couldn’t finish, we were too full.

Sat across from my partner basically sat in silence or some inane chat about whether he should ‘expand’ the suitcase for the way home. I’m F38, he’s M54. He’s obsessed with “treating himself” and “having the best”. We’ve been together 5 years. Both from working class families but now he’s on 400K salary just acts like an entitled prick. He can switch from normal down to earth guy to a wanker in short space of time.
We have been frosty for 24 hours after some ridiculous argument. Just want to go home!

OP posts:
Gemmawemma9 · 09/04/2025 22:34

Ok?
I don’t understand what the question is.

ExtraOnions · 09/04/2025 22:37

…aren’t you a bundle of fun.

There are people living in cardboard boxes, queuing at Foodbanks, and, children living in Poverty.

Enjoy what you have, you never know when it will be gone.

TheHerboriste · 09/04/2025 22:39

Then find a partner who suits you.

Pieceofpurplesky · 09/04/2025 22:42

Separate. You are at different stages. Do you have kids together?

YesThatsATurdOnTheRug · 09/04/2025 22:43

Leave him and let him find someone who enjoys what he enjoys? If you don't feel happy/ excited to be travelling etc in his company then I guess I'd question how much you actually like him?

Sofiewoo · 09/04/2025 22:44

Okay so go home?
If you can’t enjoy your partners company in a nice hotel then there are clearly serious issues in your relationship so just move on instead of leading him to believe everything is fine.
500 a night is very affordable on his salary. It’s not pretentious to like nice things with the money you earn.

It’s really weird for you to itemise so many of the costs.

KrisAkabusi · 09/04/2025 22:46

It's got fuck all to do with the hotel, all to do with you're in a relationship with the wrong person for you.

ThinWomansBrain · 09/04/2025 22:46

it doesn't sound as if it's the hotel that's the issue.

DenholmElliot11 · 09/04/2025 22:50

Oh go home then.

CardinalCat · 09/04/2025 22:51

Yawn

Jk987 · 09/04/2025 22:52

You don’t love him. You think he’s an entitled prick, no partner should think that of the other. Did he treat you to this hotel and meal or did you go halves? Either way you need to let him go.

DenholmElliot11 · 09/04/2025 22:52

Did you thank him for dinner at least?

Nousernamesleftatall · 09/04/2025 22:54

Pretty big age difference. What did you expect?

edwinbear · 09/04/2025 22:56

€110 for a tasting menu with paired wines is an absolute bargain. Haven’t seen one that cheap in years. <completely misses the point>

alwaysdeleteyourcookies · 09/04/2025 22:59

500 quid is pocket change on that salary, I suppose. It's unfathomable to me, but, equally, I would hate having a partner who itemises costs like you do here when there is no need.

I have family like this. They must always announce what everything costs. It's tiresome. If you don't like him much or enjoy his company, then separate.

CautiousLurker01 · 09/04/2025 23:07

The hotel isn’t the issue. It’s you. And the fact you clearly don’t like your partner. Possibly not helped by a ridiculous age gap.

A swanky hotel and meal is lovely with someone interesting that you love and who appreciates it.

Jiggedyjig · 09/04/2025 23:09

edwinbear · 09/04/2025 22:56

€110 for a tasting menu with paired wines is an absolute bargain. Haven’t seen one that cheap in years. <completely misses the point>

I was thinking the same.

Tumblingthrough · 09/04/2025 23:13

Why is he an entitled wanker?

He probably works hard and deserves to spend his money as he wishes.

Barney16 · 09/04/2025 23:13

I used to have a partner exactly like this. Clue is in the words used to have. It's not the money, he's boring.

HoskinsChoice · 09/04/2025 23:19

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

GoodOldTrayBake · 09/04/2025 23:23

Jiggedyjig · 09/04/2025 23:09

I was thinking the same.

Show quote history

Same… You simply can’t get a tasting menu at a 5 star hotel for that….

mumofoneAlonebutokay · 09/04/2025 23:47

Yeah agree with pp

Ltb girl - the finer things in life have to have meaning, and it sounds like you'd rather be at home with someone you have stronger feelings for x

BucketFacer · 10/04/2025 00:00

Time to pick your potato. You can stay with much older man who you are incompatible with but he has ££££££.

Or you can leave and try to find someone who is right for you.

Obviously it will depend on your values, if you have children, your financial situation without him in the picture, and whether this is just a misleading snapshot of an otherwise good relationship etc etc.

But seriously - moaning about your six course meal being too much food ...there is not a small enough violin tbh!

Mnetcurious · 10/04/2025 00:08

You’re clearly not suited to each other. The hotel and meal would be fine with me but not his superior attitude and arrogance because he has money - massive turnoff. Just end it and find someone who doesn’t act like an idiot, or be by yourself.

l3tsdanc3 · 10/04/2025 00:09

Where have you got a 6 course tasting menu with matching wines for that price? Thats incredibly cheap! Very impressed.

You clearly can’t stand him. Time to leave.

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