Sharing bills

[LovingTheSunnyDay]

This is a strange thing to ask others, but I am so confused. My partner of 7 yrs didn't pay his equal bills share in April. I was waiting politely but I had to ask yesterday because there is a big biannual flat maintenance fee for me to pay ( mortgage is mine). I had no money coming from my child father since Dec and despite working 40h a week I eventually run out of funds to cover it... My partner said that this is to make me more stern with my teenage son and to allow him to cut off the broadband, when my son doesn't do his chores on time. I am so sad, confused and feeling like I am held at ransom. How can he put me in this situation? I am told he will not give me any money, but I really can't go without his share. He agreed to paying ( reluctantly) his share yrs ago and isn't it normal to share bills when living together. He can afford it, but this is apparently to make me change. Why this feels so so wrong? Am I right that it's wrong?

Please put your children first, not this knobhead.

This. @LovingTheSunnyDay you need to be strong for you and your children, don't let him back, don't visit him, don't try to talk about your relationship. IT'S OVER and that's the best thing for you and your children.

Can you get a mortgage holiday, or reduce your payments for a while to give you a bit of extra cash?

I agree with others that he's using you and not paying his way as a way to control you. It is a difficult situation if you rely on him helping with bills, but can you live with someone like that now you know what he is really like? Not knowing whether you will have the money for your bills or not, is almost worse than knowing you don't have it and figuring something out.

Irrelevant.

Definitely sell the car and keep the money.

It’s not spiteful to take what you’re owed.

Sell the car and quit with the dick pandering. You have behaved disgracefully to your children.

OP he's not a good guy. I know it's scary but the issue with your children isn't going to go away even when they grow up it will be something else. He's controlling. It sounds like he gets "upset" when you say what you think so you're walking on eggshells. Dump the git.

You were kissing and cuddling him even after he walked out on you? Sadly it seems nothing any of us say will get through to you.

@Bonjovispyjamas I get it, but it was a friendly hug and kiss after a chat with both of us telling each other what hurts us.

I am taking in the advice and somehow it makes me more in control. Thanks to you guys here my head is cooling and even I start feeling more and more detached.

@dogcatkitten I am with Halifax and they offer mortgage holiday or 6 months interest only mortgage. Of course after that the overall monthly amount is higher. It's a short term option to get back on my feet and carry on.

I am glad I' ve got out from renting 9 yrs ago ( but I saved for years for deposit). I would be paying much more if I was renting. Small flat but therefore bills are lower compared to house. I have always dreamed about house though....

WTAF?

@iamnotalemon Fully agree.

I'm nearly thinking that his behavior is a bit out of character. Madness, and it would be madness for me to put up with this. I am sorry but my children come first, fully realised when he says now my barely 15 yrs old has to get a job. I don't think so.He has exams soon. Some summer holidays job maybe.

Overall he makes me angry now.