Looking for desperate advice

[sansalab]

Hello mums,
ive got a 3 week old baby, and we are starting to struggle financially very badly.
I’m on maternity allowance not SMP so get £187 per week. My OH earns around £32,000 before tax which may seem a lot but after bills and everything we are skint. I pay household bills and he pays rent and car payments. Our rent is £850 for a 3 bed, it’s a shitehole, mold infested and our hob doesn’t even work so I can’t cook properly. The rest of wage goes on his car payment and emergency money if there is anything left.
My household bills cost me around £900 so it leaves me to have to use overdraft and credit cards to pay for electricity and food. Please don’t work out the maths, we don’t have enough.
UC wont touch us as we earn to much but we are worse off.
I’ve sold all my valuables on to pay for previous bills and to get by.
we have no savings, my OH is locked into a financial deal with his car so we can’t sell it.
So what the hell do I do, Mother in law can look after my DD for 1-2 days a week, I can put DD in nursary at 8 weeks for £80 a day !!! If I get a job the most I will earn is roughly £30 k, I can’t work self employed on MAT allowance.
I don’t know what people do in our position.
Please give so advice as one stressed mum can’t even afford food this week.

Has something changed that’s put you in this position? Not a helpful comment but did you not work this through before having a baby?

Its unlikely to be financial deal that you can’t get out of car wise, apart from selling the car for less than the deal and having to pay a bit it might still leave you in a better position

you need to raise the issue with the landlord re the hob

why are you paying. £900pm but your oh £850 when you’re on smp?

best to list all your of income & out goings at the moment and see if you can get some helpful advice on ways to cut back

To echo PP

It’s hard for anyone to give advice, as it’s not clear how much you have coming in, and what your expenses are - line by line.

Write down every single bill that your household pays. Be absolutely brutal and include everything. See what you can cut back so just a basic television, no sky or netflix. See what you can cut back on, is there any hidden debt you don't know about?

I know you said don't do the maths but how else is anyone supposed to help?

Take home pay each month: 2313
Mat allowance: 748

So combined income: 3061

Outgoings per month
Rent: 850
Bills: 900

Leaves you 1311 per month for food, clothes, car, other spending

How much is the car?!

Because on paper, it isn't great but it does not look like you can't afford to eat.

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Your net income is approx 3k a month. Your rent is £850 and you say you pay the household bills (sounds like you're including food) which cost £900 but you are using credit cards and overdraft to fully meet these obligations.

Even if we round this up to 2k for living expenses that leaves 1k for the car payment and other expenses.

Your income won't provide a life of luxury but it's not clear why you can't afford food.

You may get some universal credit towards childcare and be able to get childcare vouchers so you save 20% tax. Even if it doesn’t make you vastly better off, it’s worth doing. I would also ask your OH to contact his finance provider about the car as if he could get rid and just have a cheap run around, that would help. I know this isn’t useful now but in future, things like car finance need to be looked at seriously before getting it, especially if you’re planning a child and for one of you to have limited income.

If the above is not an option, can you get a bar job or similar in the evening when your OH is home? Maybe register with some agencies as they normally have more work than they can fill. They can be brilliant for getting work quickly too and sometimes without even an interview.

Regarding your home, you need to be proactive with getting Environmental Health involved. If they don’t do the work to bring it up to a good standard, put in a housing application with your local Council. An environmental health report should help you to get some priority on the waiting list, especially if it’s mouldy and with having a newborn. Get your health visitor to write a letter. If you can get a Council or Housing Association property, that will save you some money and if credit is less important, your OH could get rid of the car, even if it risks a default on his credit file. He can negotiate to pay it back over time.

Whilst you’re at home, can you get a slow cooker and batch cook to save money? Reduce meat in meals and eat more pulses, beans, lentils etc which you can buy dry and soak. It makes spag bol/soups etc much cheaper.

Hang on, reading it through again - you pay all the bills of 900 even while on maternity allowance of less than 800?

So you are putting food on your own credit card? Food for you and him?

And he pays the rent which is lower despite having a much higher income?

Your problem is here is your financial relationship with your partner.

You have a child together. You are working by taking care of the child.

I woild suggest both of you pay all your income minus £150 quid each into a shared account from which the rent, household bills and car is paid and so are food for the household, nappies, cleaning products, baby clothes.

Then you both have 150 quid for your own spending.

My colleague earns over £40000 yet he gets Universal Credit, so why can't you?

We don’t have any subs, we only pay for basic bills.

900 for basic bills makes no sense then.
What is the 900 going on?

How much is:
Council tax
Water bill
Phone contact/broadband
Electricity/gas bill
TV licence

Those are your essential household bills

How much is the car lease?

That's the only thing I can think of which is putting you (as a couple) in this situation.

Unless your DP is pocketing the £1k a month extra while you sell your jewellery?

Yes £900 on bill as having to use credit card and over draft to pay them

around £600 including insurance

A month ? how long for ?

Do you have other DC? Note you have 3 bedrooms is why I’m asking.

I used to live at my job
beg hand, paying £200 a month for rent for a 3 be bungalow. Supidly a gave it up to be near family and screwed me and OH up

I’m Inc milk, nappies and food in that total

Something is not adding up with this post for me at least.

no just one, we couldn’t get a smaller house quick enough. Just happen to be the one that got back to us first

So your partner brings home 2313 per month.
He pays the rent of 850 and car of 600.

He has 863 left.
Where does that money go? Is he not paying for food, nappies or any other household bills?

Next time you need food or supplies for your baby please don't buy them on credit cards, go to a food bank and a baby bank. They should also be able to signpost to extra support.

Something isn’t adding up financially here to be honest, you’re either missing something or being misled.

As an aside, £600 for a car each month is ridiculous when you cannot afford food. You can go to the provider and explain hardship, should be easy to prove if genuine, and most will then just accept return of the car. My friend had to do this when on maternity.

I agree, unless OP's partner is commuting 200 miles a day and being bankrupted by fuel costs.