I self sabotaged yesterday and really would appreciate some perspective

[Plife]

I’ve lost 30 pounds. Probably have a similar amount to go. But really got almost addicted to “being good”. It’s hard to explain I was getting a buzz from knowing I was triumphing every single day and working towards leaving the fat me behind (who I have come to despise). Being fat really has ruined my life as I have shut myself away.

Weirdly it wasn’t too hard work not to spoil my diet plan as it was just doing my mental health the world of good. And I was feeling so empowered to broaden my horizons again.

Anyway yesterday was the first day in months where I really overdid it. I must have drank two bottles of red wine which just gave me a massive appetite- cheesy garlic bread, pasta, pizza, lasagna, birthday cake, crisps, crumble (I think I ate an entire wheel of Brie 😭) etc. All consumed in a very short period of time when very drunk.

I just feel disgusting today. I’m VERY anxious. I know the weight didn’t come on over night and it won’t be piled on from one day being bad. But I just have so much anxiety! Maybe I’m scared this is the beginning of the end?

I really could cry. What is wrong with me? My head cannot get my heart to see logic! Not like me at all

Why post twice?!

Please don't worry - you'll probably just find you spend a lot of time in the bathroom! You've made fantastic progress so just try to forget today and don't let yourself get into the same situation again. Was it all because you were drinking, do you think?

Cause I realised I wasn’t getting much traffic on weight loss. Have asked for the other post to be taken down

The other thread, which is the one where you HAVE had responses!

Listen to the What's Up Doc podcast on Willpower, it will help to put this in perspective and let you move on.

The anxiety is probably from a hangover. Have lots of water and lots of rest today, and be kind to yourself. Don’t weigh yourself for a few days so that you have time for bloating / water retention to subside. It will pass.

I think you need to be a bit more patient as well! You only posted your other thread at 14.28 yet you’ve already decided you need to start another one ...

I had eaten fine up until I was bladdered (went out for lunch then back to friends for afters). Friend’s mum set out a buffet which I just chucked myself at. The loss of control is so scary

Like I said I was very anxious. Started this thread on AIBU when I had no responses. Pls don’t police me.

Just treat today as day 1 again. Don't beat yourself up about it.

💐

I'm very much like you OP although I have less to lose. But I can be really good until I start on the wine and then all.my good intentions fly out of the window and I stuff my face with cheese, crisps and peanuts.

I think you just have to chalk it up as a bad day and start again tomorrow

I think you’ve lost sight of how well you’ve done already! 30lbs is a lot, and you’re about halfway to your goal!

Everyone slips up at some point. What matters is what you do now, not what happened yesterday

OP, you’ve kind of cheered me up if I’m honest as I ate an enormous feast at macdonalds yesterday - I swear I was blushing while I confessed all to MFP!

We all have these days. Log it and move on. Beating yourself up will lead to more sabotage but you know this I’m sure ❤️

How is anyone meant to respond to it. You've done it. Everyone falls off the wagon now and again.

The key is learn from it, recognize how you feel right now and try not to do it again. You'll be fine 😊

It was only supposed to be meal out (lunch). I wish I just went home after the restaurant.

Okay but you didn't. And it can't be undone. You are where you are, you just need to recognize how you feel right now.Remember this feeling and how bad it is.And try not to do it again.

Don't be so hard on yourself.

thanks all. There is such a disconnect between what I know and how I feel. I don’t feel I have any control over the latter.

It’s scary how much this is affecting me

I will, thank you!

That is ok.

An occasional blow out is ok. Try not to panic.

I think my panic is tied to the fact this was my first REALLY bad day since I started my weight loss journey. I’ve been able to enjoy treats but they’ve all been tracked and within my calorie deficit.

im scared this will be my undoing and I’ll go back to being a hermit 😢

fortunately your body cant process all of that -- if you'd eaten all that over a course of a month then maybe, but you'll be fine. might weigh a bit more and be bloated due to water weight. don't starve yourself, make sure you eat a lot of low kcal filling food today to fill you up as you will feel more hungry

i just plugged yesterday into my calorie tracker and it came on 5075 calories.

Aw mate, you’ll be fine! Just get back on track today.
However, I would be wary of framing your dieting as “being good”. I think this is where the problems can start.

You are a worthy person regardless of your weight. Adopting healthy eating habits/lifestyle should come from a place of love and care for yourself.

If it’s a good/bad paradigm going on, your slip ups, which inevitably will happen, will snowball into binges as you will think “well I’m no longer “good” so fuck it”.

Healthy, slim people everywhere have moments where we overeat or make choices that aren’t ideal. It means nothing, you just dust yourself off and resume your normal pattern without catastrophising or binging because your moral worth is not tied to food and there’s always a new day.

I hope I’m making sense!

Well, at least now you know your trigger. If you’re going out and know that drinks will be on the menu infuture, try alternating sparkling water with the wine so that you don’t drink as much wine, or find another non-alcoholic drink. I find 0.0% gin to be very acceptable with a diet tonic water…