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Original poster

Had to leave Costa as breastfeeding was taking too long

257 replies

CalmFawn · 06/04/2025 00:27

Visited Costa last week with my 10 day old baby. Went to meet my best friend and it was my first outing without my husband ( so a bit nervous!)

Sat down and we both ordered a coffee and a cake. Had a good chat and she held baby etc. about 40 mins into seating, I started to breastfeed baby. Coffee was nearly gone but cakes hadn’t been eaten yet. A member of staff came over and demanded I stop feeding my baby as it was ‘too time consuming’ and we’ve been sat here for too long and it was a busy period so we need to leave. We pointed out there were over 10 empty tables and we still had cake but she ignored us and held the door open for us to leave. I was so upset and embarrassed I just stopped feeding baby and rushed out.

whilst reflecting over the weekend I wish I had had said something to her but worried I’ve missed some time frame that Costa allow and overran. Was she right to ask us to leave? Or was she in the wrong?

OP posts:
Hysterectomynext · 06/04/2025 07:29

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EdithBond · 06/04/2025 07:29

If there were 10 empty tables, they certainly weren’t busy. It sounds like a rogue disapproving member of staff who used it as an excuse. Was it a woman?And 40 mins is the minimal time a cafe should expect customers to have coffee and cake. Even in a crowded cafe, I wouldn’t expect to be hassled to leave after that time. That’s probably a spend of almost £20. Cake isn’t much cheaper than a lunch, i.e. sandwich.

In future, I’d go to a cafe that’s happy for mums with babies and toddlers to meet their friends. It’s a big market, so they’d be crazy not to encourage this. But some cafes near businesses or stations mostly have customers who need a quick turnaround. So, may prefer people not to dwell. But with 10 empty tables, it certainly didn’t apply in your case.

Never feel apologetic or demanding to breastfeed in public. It’s perfectly natural. I breasted everywhere, including public transport, cafes, pubs, offices. Most people were unaware I was doing it. It just looked like I was holding the baby. Just pulled my t-shirt up and had a blanket or muslin around them. And that was 20 years ago.

stillhiding1990 · 06/04/2025 07:31

Weird how your friend did not say anything? If I witnessed a costa worker trying to eject my friend before she had finished her cake and was bf I would have said something?

Cottesloe · 06/04/2025 07:31

CalmFawn · 06/04/2025 00:34

I’m not sure why people think it’s not believable. I’ve got better things to do than make it up.

thanks, I did find the equality act on google. I’ve emailed Costa now anyway so hopefully will get a decent explanation from them

Should have just stood your ground. Why didn't your friend stick up for you? Probably someone had complained and they took their side not yours, and I would make a complaint with facts in it

Soontobe60 · 06/04/2025 07:33

Isabella70 · 06/04/2025 07:00

I would be contacting their headquarters:

  • Costa Limited
  • 3 Knaves Beech Business Centre, Davies Way, Loudwater, High Wycombe, Buckinghamshire, HP10 9QR

and citing the equalities act

Show quote history

Please don’t cite the equalities act. It doesn’t exist.
Equality Act 2010 is the one you meant.

Kiwi83 · 06/04/2025 07:33

Why did you leave, I'd have laughed in her face and carried on. Never let a twat interrupt your babies meals, next time something like this happens tell them to jog on x

cannynotsay · 06/04/2025 07:35

I once spent almost 2 hours in a Costa with my daughter breastfeeding, I was having a terrible day and it was so busy, and then went back again. The staff were lovely, and I’ve been visiting that coast regularly now and she’s almost 3, so no there’s defo no Costa policy and that’s also illegal what this person said to you!! I’m sorry you experienced this. Xx

Jk987 · 06/04/2025 07:41

Fruitytutti223 · 06/04/2025 01:11

Funnily enough I had this today. Chairs and tables at a fair. Sat down to feed babe. Woman said you can’t feed here. To be fair at this point I realised this woman was actually trying to sell the tables and chairs (even though not a single customer in sight). So I did say sorry and moved. But it did make me wonder after. Never had anyone ask me not to feed before. But it was her private property the chairs.

I told my partner after in a listen to this awkward moment context. He said well fair enough. It would be like you sitting on a sofa in dfs feeding. And I thought I am pretty sure it’s illegal for them to tell you you can’t feed in dfs. So that made me ponder about this ladies garden chairs.

Random musing and not probably not worth a court case to find out 😂

It may or may not be illegal to tell someone they can't breastfeed in DFS but it's common courtesy not to do it in the first place!

Katypp · 06/04/2025 07:44

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BoiledOrRoastPotatoes · 06/04/2025 07:45

A colleague of mine spent 5hrs in Costa working as he has just moved and the WiFi in his new house is awful so worked from Costa. No one told him to leave.

Strictlymad · 06/04/2025 07:46

I’m sorry this happened to you, unfortunately a lot of chains are awful about breastfeeding (despite it being illegal for them to object) and I’ve heard many stories similar. I work in infant feeding. Please complain as loudly as you wish op, she was out of order, no you haven’t been there too long at 40 mins, and hadn’t eating what you had purchased. Like you say there were empty tables. I think you’re right she didn’t like breastfeeding so made up an excuse. Shocking behaviour

Katypp · 06/04/2025 07:46

Jk987 · 06/04/2025 07:41

It may or may not be illegal to tell someone they can't breastfeed in DFS but it's common courtesy not to do it in the first place!

Show quote history

Exactly.

Superfoodie123 · 06/04/2025 07:48

If this is true its a battle I'd love to fight. Don't just email, tweet, post on insta etc. I'd be going into the branch again too and demanding to speak to the manager in front of her

pelargoniums · 06/04/2025 07:48

Jk987 · 06/04/2025 07:41

It may or may not be illegal to tell someone they can't breastfeed in DFS but it's common courtesy not to do it in the first place!

Show quote history

Eh? How is it common courtesy not to breastfeed? The point is that it’s fine to do it anywhere, which most people understand.

Nice volunteer at Chawton House once led me to “Jane Austen’s favourite chair” when I asked if they had anywhere I could sit to feed, invited me to enjoy the view and asked if I needed water: that’s common courtesy. I go back annually to get a photo of DS as he grows in “his” and Jane’s chair.

Superfoodie123 · 06/04/2025 07:49

Can you name and shame the branch?

moveoveralice · 06/04/2025 07:49

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Superfoodie123 · 06/04/2025 07:51

Jk987 · 06/04/2025 07:41

It may or may not be illegal to tell someone they can't breastfeed in DFS but it's common courtesy not to do it in the first place!

Show quote history

Is this mumsnet? Why is it courtesy not to feed your baby in public!??

ThatsNotMyTeen · 06/04/2025 07:51

People sit in likes of Costa for hours. chatting. reading, working etc. 40 mins isn’t long at all. Definitely complain

pelargoniums · 06/04/2025 07:53

Superfoodie123 · 06/04/2025 07:51

Is this mumsnet? Why is it courtesy not to feed your baby in public!??

Show quote history

I assume that poster also finds it vulgar for adults to eat and drink in public.

thepariscrimefiles · 06/04/2025 07:56

IHaveAlwaysLivedintheCastle · 06/04/2025 01:09

But surely the pont is the OP was being asked to move because she had paid for one coffee and a cake and was hogging a table; not because she was breast feeding.

There were loads of empty tables. If the cafe was full and other customers needed a table, they would have a point in asking them to leave. However, as this wasn't the case, it was obviously due to her breastfeeding and they have broken the law.

ThatsNotMyTeen · 06/04/2025 07:56

Kiwi83 · 06/04/2025 07:33

Why did you leave, I'd have laughed in her face and carried on. Never let a twat interrupt your babies meals, next time something like this happens tell them to jog on x

Because she’s 10 days post partum? Likely sleep deprived, still in pain, hormonal? I’m great at standing up for myself, but at that stage post partum I felt very vulnerable and wouldn’t have been able to

EdgyMentor · 06/04/2025 08:04

Those of you saying it's not true , the OP posted at 1:15 and 6:30 on a Sunday. Those are definitely the witching hours of a breast feeding woman.

Op work on your "I've not slept for six months and I will get both boobs out in this establishment if you fuck with me again" face.

It will help you many many times over the coming years, in many unrelated but similarly annoying situations.

Ghosttofu99 · 06/04/2025 08:06

IHaveAlwaysLivedintheCastle · 06/04/2025 01:09

But surely the pont is the OP was being asked to move because she had paid for one coffee and a cake and was hogging a table; not because she was breast feeding.

But she had to leave without eating the cake.

Costa has gone seriously downhill since Coke took it over, the coffee doesn’t even taste the same. It used to be a cosy place with nice furniture where you could stop and have a chat, now it’s a wipe clean, in/out, soulless place.

None of those are good reasons for breaking the law.

I wonder if they would have asked a man on his laptop to leave?!

EdgyMentor · 06/04/2025 08:07

Not sure you can avoid occasionally spraying milk in the early days, so I definitely wouldn't feed on furniture that was for sale. Be that bottle, jar or breast, but I love that a pp was given Jane Austen's favourite chair for bf!

RominaDina · 06/04/2025 08:08

So. There were 10 empty tables, you still had cake, you started to breastfeed and a member of staff actually told you off and held the door open for you to leave?
Costa in the UK?.🤔