Owls

[TwitTwooTwat]

I have owl rage, and I need to let it all owl-t. AIBU to dislike owls and their twit-twoo hooting fuckery?

I know I might ruffle some feathers with this opinion, but a owl has moved nearby and every night I can hear it making less than whootiful night noises. It’s being antisoci-owl. Probably trying to attract a mate. The only time we don’t hear it, is when it rains as it is, ahem, too-wet-to-woo.

Local FB page weirdos say they love hearing it, but how I can I get the feathery fuckwit to go Hoo-dini without it turning into a Hoot-dunnit? I don’t want someone to talon me. Anyone know any owlchemy?

Mention of Hedwig upthread reminded me I once heard an interview from someone who trains birds for films including iirc the Harry Potters. He liked working with corvids because they’re so bright but less so with owls which weren’t. Maybe they are twits not twats.

Ravens can talk and are very intelligent. You can follow the Raven master on Twitter and the ravens pester him to stroke their heads and nip him affectionately.

Talking about owls. My friend was on a dusk walk and came across some baby owls who flapped their wings and hissed to scare her away.

My opinion of them changed after I was once stalked by a psychopathic owl while driving down a country lane in the middle of the night

The owl was circling me and three times it swooped down and its claws scrapped my window screen, not sure what type of it was but it was massive

I could have driven into a tree this was obviously the owls intention

The only wildlife I'm not thrilled to hear are fucking peacocks. We used to have a neighbour with peacocks and omg they were noisy buggers.

I stayed on a campsite once that had peacocks. Never again!

Also, those who have wood pigeons, have you noticed they say, “my toes hurt, Betty”?

I’m not an owl fan. Once had a stand off with one on a one track country road. It was enormous, like the size of large dog, and it wouldn’t move, just stared at us for ages. Creepiest thing I’ve ever seen. Stubborn little fucker

If that happens again, tell it about the Gruffalo’s favourite food being owl ice cream. Feathers and all.

I am thinking about ordering a cardboard cut out Gruffalo to scare them away to somewhere they can appreciated but a MNer.

After the giraffe thread, I thought you'd be asking about the best way to take one for a walk.
At least it's not a peacock; my sister had one that took a liking to her former home.

• as well as being noisy, it was violent- tried to attack my cat & BiL rescued her by brandishing a spade. A few weeks later it tried to attack their rather large dog. Mysteriously disappeared after the dog incident. Didn't do the thatched roof much good either.

And it's not a Harris Hawk, like the one that's been attacking people in a Hertfordshire village Flamstead hawk finally captured after terrorising village - BBC News

So it could be worse😀

Mating calls. Wouldn't be a problem if it was raining as it would be t'wet t'woo!

Hmm. Howoooo would you take an owl for a walk? It’s pesky twisty neck thing would play havoc with a harness At least parrots sit on your shoulder if you want to go for a walk.