To ask what your most stupid work telling off was?

[BeatleBattleInABottle]

I need cheering up so if you'd like to share the most stupid reasons you've been told off for at work, that would help!

I've just been issued a formal warning for not following sickness procedures. I returned to work today after being off work since last Monday. Literally "Hi, welcome back. Here's a warning". The reason I didnt follow sickness procedures was because I texted my boss each day instead of phoning in. She replied so she received them. Why did I text? I collapsed on Sunday evening and was in hospital until Sunday. TBH they are lucky I remembered to contact them at all for the first few days. I certainly wasn't in a state to talk.

Same job a few months back. I was organising a conference for 350 people. I needed to confirm numbers so sent a professional email to everyone asking thrm to confirm attendance, dietary and other requirement etc. If they hadn't replied by the deadline, I would phone them. Plenty of time to do this. Nope. Not good enough. I had to recall the email and spend 3 days calling people instead. Great use of time, boss!

Finally, last month, I was sent an email bitching about me. They'd obviously put my name in the address, instead of the subject. I just replied "I don't think this was meant for me". Apparently that was "unprofessional" and upset the people who'd sent it! In hindsight, I probably shouldn't have replied, just to watch them squirm.

Yes, I'm stepping up my job hunt.

DH (just DP then) once got bollocked on my behalf for ringing my manager and telling them I would be unable to work because I was unwell. The exact response from the manager was 'well can't you take her to the doctors to make sure she isn't making it up'. Said manager then demanded to talk to me and got very cross when I couldn't come to the phone.

I was in hospital. At the time they thought I was having a stroke. I couldn't even tell you my name, let alone have a conversation with someone. Thankfully it wasn't a stroke but a hemiplegic migraine- which to all intents and purposes mimic strokes. Unsurprisingly they can't be faked.

Said manager was a cow beyond all belief. I have many, many more stories of her actions. However she was very publicly sacked around 10 years ago. It's the only time I have taken direct pleasure in someone else's misfortune.

I used to work on the checkouts at a well known supermarket that rhymes with Zazda. A customer accidentally picked up 2 of the same magazine, so left one at my till. When it was quiet and I’d done all of the possible jobs around my till that I could, I decided to subtly (or so I thought) flick through the magazine. My manager, who had a real problem with me caught me. The magazine was binned and I was disciplined for vandalising company property. Apparently they could no longer sell it because I had turned the pages. Haha.

This was many years ago, but it still makes me shake my head: I was given a warning about a mystery incident, but she insisted she couldn't tell me what she thought I'd done as "it's confidential," so there was no way I could defend myself. As I'd already submitted my resignation, had a new job starting and it was my last week there, I told her I wasn't going to put up with any more of her bs and I walked out. I still have no idea what she was on about.

I got told off a few months ago by my boss for posting a question in a group chat between us and another department, that was specifically set up to answer these sort of questions because the other department makes the decisions and we just communicate them externally. Apparently by asking questions in that chat we could accidentally end up clearing up grey areas of policy that the rest of my team use to their advantage and in future I was only to ask my team directly. I rolled my eyes so hard that I think I saw my brain. Especially as I had asked our team directly and no one knew the answer so told me to ask in the other chat.

I completely get this! I really just couldn't be bothered to ask everyone in the office what they wanted to drink every time I got up to get myself one. Just make your own bloody cup of tea! I'm sure it didn't go down well but I did not care . If I was working with a particular person I would ask, but not the whole bloody office.

Changing a patients care plan and when he asked why, I told him the current one isn’t working. This was then confirmed by his consultant who put it in his notes that nurses MUST follow the new care plan (that I wrote).

I then received a call from the manager who told me the patient had raised concerns about his previous care plan being wrong. I told her I never said it was wrong, just that it needed changing. I was told to be careful what I tell the patients and that could have got the previous nurse in trouble.

WTF was I supposed to say? “I’m changing it because I feel like it mate, don’t ask questions!”

bloody ridiculous NHS - glad to be out of it

When I was 16 I had a weekend job in a well known national pet shop. I had agreed to do an extra shift on a weekday after college. But I was ill that day and went home early from college, so called in sick. Unfortunately they were having some inspection that day so the district manager answered. He wanted to know why I hadn’t made a doctor’s appointment ffs. Then my regular manager called back and screamed down the phone at me for not being well enough.

Another part time job I had a few years later was at a well known national pizza chain. It was a Saturday evening and someone called to complain about their takeaway order. The manager on duty told me to refund them which I did. The following day a different manager was in and he was very upset that I’d given this family a refund. When I told him that I’d been instructed to by the other manager he went ballistic and said not to take instructions from him! I walked out that night.

I was a student ODP about 10 years ago and we had the perennial fallout chat too. Is why everyone wears trousers in theatres now.

Just to say I really sympathise over the migraine. Bloody frightening and deeply unpleasant. I’ve had classic migraines since I was a teenager; aura, one sided numbness and headache and that awful inability to speak/think/read. They’re still alarming even though I know what they are (I always without fail get a blind spot as the first symptom and I’m pretty sure that is not a stroke symptom so at least I don’t panic that it’s a stroke.

Interestingly, they now think there is a link between these sorts of migraines and stroke, whereas they used to say that despite the similarities there is no link. Apparently they are a contraindication for HRT, or certain types of HRT, although I confess I haven’t researched that properly yet (I need to soon!).

Hope you don’t get them often.

I get migraines with aura as the first sign of onset.

I came into work once planning to drive myself and my manager to a meeting, but 15m before the set off, an aura started.

I said sorry, won't be able to drive, we'll need to get a taxi and hopefully my head will be ok when I get there.

Manager - "well I can't get my car now, and a taxi will be really expensive".
Other manager - "what do you expect her to do, drive blind".

First manager was very unpopular in the company :D

For putting the stamps slightly too close to the edge of the envelope when sending out legal letters. My boss made me measure each one and put them exactly one inch from the edges. He used to spot check them with a ruler.

Sympathy here too - I developed hemiplegic migraines suddenly during perimenopause and it bloody frightening until they figured out what it was.

Re the hrt and stroke risk - it is an increased risk, but it’s still an extremely small risk so long as you don’t have other risk factors. (I’m on hrt and had some trouble finding a sensible gynae who would prescribe it.)

A PIP for not getting sales targets...during lockdown..we were furloughed. I a got another job instead.

Thankfully since that incident (almost 20 years ago) I have only had 3 more hemi migraines. 2 out of them have involved ambulances but that's the roll of the dice.

I'll be very unlikely to ever be given HRT as I've had very, very bad reactions to hormonal contraception in the past

I was 17 I set fire to the bosses paper think broadsheet type.
He was reading it at the time,I lit it at the bottom middle.
What a row I got but worth it to see his face.

I worked in one school where the Tea Fund Co-ordinator (genuinely called himself that) complained that I showed a lack of team spirit by not joining. It literally paid for tea, coffee, milk and sugar - I don't drink tea or coffee and I'm allergic to milk.

Plus I was only in that school one day a fortnight.

He was the only male member of staff in the school and somehow, despite being an absolute arse, seemed to have the whole SLt in thrall of him. The DHT asked if I would join - £3 a week he wanted - just for team spirit and actually said "Oh, X will be very disappointed" when I said no.

This reminds me of a colleague in an old school who got told off for reading on his lunch break. Apparently, it was only acceptable to do it in the staff room and not sat where students could see him! We are English teachers!

Eating 2 biscuits (in a school, apparently it was beyond the pale to exceed 1)
Making a colleague a cup of tea after having to tell her that her Grandfather had died
Flattening boxes incorrectly
Putting too much filling in sandwiches.
I had some amazing jobs in my youth 😆

I got told off for walking with my hands in my pockets while the person delivering this telling off was standing with their hand in their pocket!

Shouted at hard when I innocently produced a photo copy of the leave request that my manager said I hadn't submitted. I thought I was being efficient but oh no how dare I undermine them and prove them wrong.

Same job, different managers.

Did you misread the OP as "what's the stupidest thing you ever did at work that earned you a telling off"

You can go work with the person above who bit the buttons off the photocopier.

I once had a temporary department manager who was very strange. One time there was a whole company meeting in the theatre. 4 of us sat in the nearest seats to the back entrance which was the back row, aling with a few other people from other depts. Our dept was scattered around the rest of the theatre, same as other depts. Our manager marched over to us and said "do NOT sit in the back row! How many times do I have to say it?" I replied that it was the first I'd heard of it. She gave no reason for it other than thundering "I'm your manager! Do as I say!!!"

Oh God! Flashback to my first job. I was threatened with the sack for not flattening boxes correctly. She was right (I'd flattened them in a way that they bounced back up and this blocked a fire exit) but she was just so mean about it. A grown woman yelling at a timid 14 year old on her first day and in front of customers. Completely unnecessary.

Urgh, why are people so mean?! I think I was about 16 during my own flat packing disaster. I mean it’s boxes- there are only so many ways to flatten them!

That's horrible.

All of these have just reminded me. First job at a large independent pharmacy on the high street. Got pulled off the front counter because I didn't have the look they needed. Basically I wasn't pretty and I didn't wear enough make up. I was told u could however do cashing up, gift wrapping and cleaning out the back where no one could see me. I was also just 14 and realised then that I was "plain" and that people really are total c*nts.