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Original poster

DC thinks they're being controlled WTF

162 replies

frustratedgirlmum · 31/03/2025 16:29

Hi,
My DC who is 13 is under the impression they are being controlled by an entity inside their mind. They have not disclosed the name of this entity but lives in fear of it and says things like...

  • 'I can't do this or [the entity] will hurt me.'
  • 'I'm not safe around [the entity]'
  • 'Please help me, I'm in danger because of [the entity]
They also cycle through processes of loving and hating this entity. It all seemed to begin happening around their 13th birthday last year - they now spends huge amounts of time talking to themself (or the entity). I think this entity is like an abusive partner/something abusive; they can't remove themselves from it but has been very, very since it came into the picture. We've tried all kinds of therapy, nothing works, they don't try, refuses medication, I'm really not too sure what I'm supposed to do now. I've been worrying it could be schizophrenia or something worse and keeping myself up at night because of it but I'm just terrified to face that reality... I sometimes think I'm unreasonable for thinking that way/ Looking for advice/hand holds and also WTF!!!
OP posts:
Watchingfromadistance · 31/03/2025 19:36

Wondering if it would be useful to look at https://www.voicecollective.co.uk/- focus is young people who hear voices, see visions, or have other sensory experiences or beliefs. From memory, it is connected to one of the branches of Mind mental health charity and has info for young people and their parents/carers/families.

Horserider5678 · 31/03/2025 19:46

frustratedgirlmum · 31/03/2025 16:52

@loropianalover It doesn't approve of most things, e.g if she does badly on a test she will be 'punished' somehow by the voice (I have no idea what this means to be honest.)
We've tried the following -

  • Equine therapy, done for ~2 years
  • 'Normal' therapy, pretty much for her whole life
  • Coaching, done for about a year and a half
  • Art therapy, done for a few months
  • Play therapy, done for roughly a year
  • CBT, a year and a half
  • EMDR, 6 months
  • Exposure therapy, ~a year
+ I could go on, but these are the ones we've spent a bigger portion of time on. Interventions made by the GP, former therapists, doctors, school, teachers and coaches, as well as psychiatrist. She refused ADHD medication prescribed by her doctor as well as other sickness related medicines like antibiotics etc.

These therapies won’t work! You DC needs a proper psychiatric assessment, what you describe could be schizophrenia. However, it could be a hormonal imbalance. A psychiatrist will assess DC arrange blood tests etc. please don’t be fobbed off by your GP!

2men3eyebrows · 31/03/2025 19:47

I appreciate you’re probably limiting details for the sake of privacy, but regardless your DD needs a psychiatrist.

This could be a wide variety of things (trauma response, OCD, eating disorder, thought insertion, etc ). Psychiatrists are no fools, they will consider all the likely differentials. They won’t just slap a serious diagnosis on her at age 13. If you go through the NHS/GP they will also rule out organic causes before considering psychiatric ones.

If you’re concerned that she’ll end up with a serious diagnosis that will follow her around then just go private. The medical notes/diagnosis will not be visible to anyone outside that practice unless you share it.

KindOfKash · 31/03/2025 19:47

KezzaMucklowe · 31/03/2025 16:42

I think this is a bit beyond MN tbh.
I will echo other posters and suggest an emergency appointment with a gp if you haven't had one already.
Obviously you'll get a hand hold and support but you definitely need expert advice.

10000% this could get dangerous! seek help as soon as possible

TheMimsy · 31/03/2025 19:49

Massive squishes @frustratedgirlmum.

sounds very much like my son (he developed it at 22). He has to have a depo injection as he won’t take meds. He has no choice as he’s sectioned though.

i do recommend a Facebook group called POPS. There are a few parents in with young children in that have similar situations.

www.facebook.com/share/g/1YWpa15wnF/?mibextid=wwXIfr

RedHelenB · 31/03/2025 19:51

Do they do this at school?

AngryBookworm · 31/03/2025 19:57

Oh gosh OP that must be so depressing, your poor DD. Definitely worth seeing a psychiatrist, they won't necessarily prescribe medication right away but they will be expert in what it could be and help you get a diagnosis. This might feel scary but it can help get support and adjustments in the future and the right diagnosis will mean the right support. Yes it's scary and totally fair to be scared - but the sooner this is looked at, the sooner her suffering can be addressed. Even if it's not perfect, it'll likely be better. Good luck 💐

Mazehazegaze · 31/03/2025 20:01

@frustratedgirlmum you may have already done/ tried my suggestions - apologies in advance if that’s the case.
If I were you I would take my DD to see a clinical psychologist who is experienced in working with complex trauma and psychosis (and neurodivergence too if possible) - you have alluded to your DD experiencing trauma in her life and voice hearing/ experiencing an “entity” can result from this. Add to this some neurodivergence and one is even more likely to experience a MH difficulty.
As I mother I would

  • tell my daughter that I believe this is her experience & that I am here and she can tell me anything
  • I would aim to be curious about the entity and when she hears/experiences it more loudly/intensely and when it quietens down a bit (as for most people who hear voices the intensity varies) - this will help you and her to understand what helps and hopefully this can give her more a sense of control. Almost be a bit like a detective finding out about it
  • I would really focus on safety. It sounds like from the bits you’ve said that your DD might have felt quite unsafe at points in her life to date. I would be really keen on I know where/ when/with whom she feels most relaxed and to then build on that… like if for instance she feels really safe and relaxed at the beach, she could carry around a stone with her and touch it if she is feelings worried
  • I would ask her what I can do/say to help her to feel better when the entity threatens her/says unkind things… would it help for me to tell her everything is going to be okay for example?
  • for some people it’s not about getting rid of the voice but finding ways to deal with it and to feel as safe and in control as possible
  • there are celebrity voice hearers (you can look up) and I think maybe 1 in 10 people hear voices at some time in their lives (look up as I may be wrong with my stat!) so it might also be helpful for her to know that she is not alone and that many people hear voices and experience other phenomena, particularly when under stress; essentially normalise it so she doesn’t think she is going mad!
  • I also know a video which might help - I’ll see if I can find it
and finally look after yourself as best you can and model the importance of self-compassion by doing that - as supporting someone in distress can be so hard
Mazehazegaze · 31/03/2025 20:13

Mazehazegaze · 31/03/2025 20:06

@frustratedgirlmum might help for you and your DD to watch these together - or just for you if she’s not keen:
https://www.ted.com/talks/eleanor_longden_the_voices_in_my_head?language=en

m.youtube.com/watch?v=hPgFfYoUJCk

Caveat! I think these videos are designed for adults so of course watch first and check age-appropriate for her

dannyufcfan · 31/03/2025 20:14

Could be a sign of OCD.

Anonymouseposter · 31/03/2025 20:19

Boredzebra · 31/03/2025 19:17

It’s OCD

Based on your thorough and comprehensive psychiatric assessment?

None of us are in a position to say what exactly the problem is, even those with relevant professional qualifications - but we can hear enough to know that an urgent psychiatric assessment is needed.

mathanxiety · 31/03/2025 20:23

Your child needs to see a psychiatrist asap.

Mazehazegaze · 31/03/2025 20:23

@frustratedgirlmum I’m also just thinking that I know that it can be an enormous wait for an appt with a psychiatrist within CAMHS if a child is not at risk of hurting self or other; so you may wish to pursue this privately. I’m also wondering whether you might be able to access an “early intervention in psychosis” team - who often work with 14 plus I think. They would do their own assessment and signpost as needed and I believe waiting times can be shorter

raffegiraffe · 31/03/2025 20:23

Highly unlikely to be schizophrenia at the age of 13. I would guess it's some sort of dissociation. Common post trauma. I hope your daughter is ok this must be very stressful for you both

mathanxiety · 31/03/2025 20:25

2men3eyebrows · 31/03/2025 19:47

I appreciate you’re probably limiting details for the sake of privacy, but regardless your DD needs a psychiatrist.

This could be a wide variety of things (trauma response, OCD, eating disorder, thought insertion, etc ). Psychiatrists are no fools, they will consider all the likely differentials. They won’t just slap a serious diagnosis on her at age 13. If you go through the NHS/GP they will also rule out organic causes before considering psychiatric ones.

If you’re concerned that she’ll end up with a serious diagnosis that will follow her around then just go private. The medical notes/diagnosis will not be visible to anyone outside that practice unless you share it.

Edited

Yes to all of this.

IsItBeesThoughLooshkin · 31/03/2025 20:26

I read about something called avatar therapy for people who hear voices. Seems like it might be quite helpful to a lot of people. Maybe look into it?

www.theguardian.com/science/2024/oct/28/using-avatars-in-psychosis-therapy-can-help-those-who-hear-voices-study-finds

Shitmonger · 31/03/2025 20:30

She absolutely needs to see a psychiatrist as a precaution. You’ve said that she asks for help and seems afraid. How does she respond to the idea of receiving professional help to deal with “the entity?” Is she willing, or does she suddenly clam up and not want any part of it?

Having worked with this age group a great deal, I’ve seen this more than you’d think. Including an 11 year-old girl that started talking about an “entity” that was controlling her.

Get her into a psychiatrist as soon as possible, but hold off panic until they have evaluated her and raised concerns.

Anonymouseposter · 31/03/2025 20:34

raffegiraffe · 31/03/2025 20:23

Highly unlikely to be schizophrenia at the age of 13. I would guess it's some sort of dissociation. Common post trauma. I hope your daughter is ok this must be very stressful for you both

Highly unlikely, but not completely impossible. So unlikely that there's a danger of it being missed.

pikkumyy77 · 31/03/2025 20:45

dannyufcfan · 31/03/2025 20:14

Could be a sign of OCD.

Stop it.

kittensinthekitchen · 31/03/2025 20:46

You've posted before haven't you? Quite recently?

It would be helpeful to see the information in those posts to get the full picture and make sure nothing is missed.

Endofyear · 31/03/2025 20:47

I'm so sorry, you must be terribly worried 😞 I think you need to find a psychiatrist who specialises in treatment of adolescents urgently. Keep a close eye on your daughter for any escalation of symptoms as paranoid schizophrenia, if that's what you suspect, can result in a crisis situation. If you fear for her safety, or yours, call 999. There is also the option of 111 and asking for the mental health crisis team if you're worried but not in danger. Do you have support from family or close friends? This is a lot for you to deal with on your own.

Mazehazegaze · 31/03/2025 20:50

Mazehazegaze · 31/03/2025 20:13

Caveat! I think these videos are designed for adults so of course watch first and check age-appropriate for her

Show quote history

@frustratedgirlmum im just watching these together Eleanor longden TED talk again and I think it could be frightening for a 13 year old to watch, but could be helpful for you in terms of helping to normalise and understand her experience (now or at some point in the future)

thestudio · 31/03/2025 20:52

frustratedgirlmum · 31/03/2025 19:09

@Organic82 I’ve mentioned this before but this is the final time I’ll say it again. Refused meds for other things, like ADHD. Meds not presented for current situation.

I think a psychiatrist would certainly advise meds for a child who is hearing voices. It's possible, OP, that she may now feel so unsafe that she will be prepared to try medication to alleviate her immense anxiety?

StScholastica · 31/03/2025 20:57

OP, I get that you are worried but you really really need to get your DD seen by a psychiatrist who is experienced with adolescents.

She is a child and you have a duty of care to get her seen properly by her GP and/or an NHS early intervention service.

Anything else is bordering neglectful.

Why are you avoiding her GP? Are you hoping that you can avoid this going on her medical records?

I am concerned re the quality of the therapy she has received so far because every single one of those therapists should have asked you to get her assessed by her GP and psychiatry.