DC thinks they're being controlled WTF

[frustratedgirlmum]

Hi,
My DC who is 13 is under the impression they are being controlled by an entity inside their mind. They have not disclosed the name of this entity but lives in fear of it and says things like...

• 'I can't do this or [the entity] will hurt me.'
• 'I'm not safe around [the entity]'
• 'Please help me, I'm in danger because of [the entity]

They also cycle through processes of loving and hating this entity. It all seemed to begin happening around their 13th birthday last year - they now spends huge amounts of time talking to themself (or the entity). I think this entity is like an abusive partner/something abusive; they can't remove themselves from it but has been very, very since it came into the picture. We've tried all kinds of therapy, nothing works, they don't try, refuses medication, I'm really not too sure what I'm supposed to do now. I've been worrying it could be schizophrenia or something worse and keeping myself up at night because of it but I'm just terrified to face that reality... I sometimes think I'm unreasonable for thinking that way/ Looking for advice/hand holds and also WTF!!!

@Organic82 Sorry, I misspoke. I know she's friendly with people but she doesn't have any close relationships etc. Only child so no siblings. She has a few hobbies.

Well you said she’d never had any trauma earlier?

sounds more like Munchausen syndrome and attention seeking. Most people with paranoid schizophrenia who exhibit these symptoms are petrified and either suffer in isolation or will do anything to make it stop, not talk about it in snippets. I’m assuming no one at school has had any feedback of talking to herself?

https://www.voicecollective.co.uk

@overthinkersanonnymus They do. There is ALOT of concern from people/peers about this situation.

This should get him reasonably swift access to an NHS psychiatrist - it is very concerning. Has that happened, and if not why not?

She does generally suffer in isolation and pretend nothing is wrong but as her mother I can see something is up. Over the last few months it's like observing a different person. She's gone from seeming okay (even if a bit quiet) to petrified, anxious and fearful.

I really feel for you OP.

Is there a reason she is not under an NHS mental health service?

@MJSavesTheDay We can afford private, and NHS waiting lists are quite long.

Ok If that’s the case and what you’re saying is being witnessed by other people, including medical professionals, then they are letting you both down and she probably needs to be in hospital.

What you have described is a very, very unwell person and I speak from experience.

I wish you luck in getting her treatment.

How frightening for you and DC. Sometimes a voice can be a manifestation of their own inner voice even if it seems to be going against what they would want, I wonder if this is an acutely anxious child with some history of trauma. I wouldn't do anything else without a trusted respected psychiatrist advising you, if you go private make sure they've got a current or recent history of working in the public sector in uk with adolescents. Also wean her off tiktok if she is on it.

I understand this. If you can though look for a doctor who also practices in the nhs and if things get too much go to a and e to immediately access nhs help

I used to work for CAMHS ( retired now). Schizophrenia is unusual before late teens but not unheard of. I experienced one incident of early onset schizophrenia in a 13 year old during my time there. Everyone including the psychiatrist missed it initially because it’s unusual but the child was admitted to an adolescent unit and it became clear. There could be other explanations related to trauma etc but a thorough assessment is needed and I would push for a second opinion from another psychiatrist. I hope this is a transient thing which resolves but if it’s a more serious mental illness early diagnosis and treatment is needed.

If there is a significant history of trauma (and as you have tried EMDR I presume there is) then there are possibilities other than schizophrenia, paranoid or otherwise.

however either way this is quite significant mental illness and a long way above mumsnet’s pay grade.

I’d recommend finding a psychiatrist and speaking to them. You may also find family therapy helpful.

i won’t go into alternative diagnoses on here but if you want to pm me we can talk.

My eldest DS started to display evidence of a serious MH condition ( bi-polar with severe GAD on top of ASD) as adolescence hoved in from 12. Please if your DD is not on CAHMS radar keep hassling your GP, school and all. Contact NHS Direct if you ever suspect she may be actively detached from reality. TBH NHS CAHMS pulled out all the stops to support DS once if became very clear how acutely and severely unwell he was.

I can recommend Young MINDS into support you as you navigate to get her the help she needs. https://www.youngminds.org.uk/parent/find-help/

Ok, makes sense.

If she's not already on the NHS wait list though, I'd get her on it asap.

With the kind of symptoms you describe, CAMHS really is the most appropriate mental health service for your child at the moment.

Although private healthcare often offers better care, in the case of your daughter I actually think the NHS will be better. I know there may be a long wait list, but with the symptoms you describe she may well be under mental health services for many years to come, and NHS services can provide the most appropriate package of care. They can also liaise with school etc.. As I said before, she should be offered family therapy and the NHS would (or should) know that as they have to comply with nice guidelines. Private therapists can do what they like which is probably why this hasn't been offered to you yet (when it should have been).

Although the NHS is v flawed and CAMHS is far far far from perfect, having worked in this field for many years I do think in your daughter's case it would be very wise for her to be under CAMHS. The NHS also has a child& adolescent crisis/home treatment service which may also be useful as your daughter gets older and especially if her thoughts and the entity become more threatening or difficult to manage. Hooking in with this service will be easier if she is already known to CAMHS.

(CAMHS will be flawed. You will be disappointed. BUT, they probably are the best option right now, IMO)

Yes but it sounds like she's seen a load of (sometimes dubious) therapists and no psychiatrist has addressed what sounds like clear psychosis. Private isn't always best.

This is also a situation where I would feel more comfortable with the multi disciplinary approach of NHS CAMHS.
Get on the waiting list, what have you got to lose by doing that?

@User5274959 We are on the waiting list.

That's good. Keep them updated with any changes or new developments as may affect priority.

I agree with this.

I'm surprised they haven't prioritised you, at least for initial appointment, but they sometimes don't prioritise people who are already under private care so this may be slowing things down a bit for you.

As others have indicated, a Schizophrenia diagnosis (and many other diagnosis’s that may be relevant here) relies on a thorough mental health assessment by a psychiatrist or psychologist. I’d encourage any private consultations share the reports with her GP so you get a comprehensive connected history built up, which is hard to do if you are only using different private facilities. I hope you all get some clarity on what’s going on soon.

This must be very very disruptive for the other 30 children in her class

This sounds really worrying and upsetting. I have a young adult DS with severe mental-health issues and it's unbelievably difficult. I don't have any answers because your child obviously needs skilled medical help. He/she must be living in a state of heightened anxiety all the time.

My only advice is to keep pushing for help and never give up (this is my life!).

It's really good that you can afford private healthcare as NHS mental healthcare is so poor.

And ignore the less sympathetic responses you've had here. If only children's mental health problems were down to wanting a few days off school - that would make it all so much easier!

What do you suggest the OP does about that?

Could it be a side effect of the medication she is taking? Google, some drugs have rare side effects.