Echolalia in toddler

[Ladybug1235]

My little girl just turned 26 months and she can do the following :

1. Expressive language : Has over 200 words and speaks in 2/3 sometimes 4 word sentences including connectors , adjective and verbs like “ bunny sitting on the train “
2. Good receptive language with two step instructions at all times and she listens and responds to other members of the family .
3. She is Social to some extent but it takes a while to warm her up and then she interacts well with adults and her peers ( although she still wants me close by ) She engages with kids if it is 1/1 interaction like playing with ball or on the beach but if there are lots of kids she just looks at them / what they are doing .
4. She eats and sleeps like a champ so far all 12 hours and all type of food apart from scrambled eggs 🍳
5. She can answer questions like (?what/where /who’s , what is mommy/daddy doing ? What color is dolly ? Where does the hat go ? What do you want ?
6. Asks questions like / what’s that . What happened and what’s the sound , why are you sad / scared etc
7. She can easily transition from her house to a new one without problems and she is not repetitive in any way apart from when she goes on the swing at the park and doesn’t want to get off to try other things 😅.
8. Tantrum wise she is fairly good at self soothing and her tantrums don’t last more than 5 minutes .

She still tends to repeat almost verbatim what we say “ the entire phrase and I know that immediate echolalia is a ref flag and someone suggested GLP

Like when she wakes up from nap : she started saying “ it is empty “ referring to a box in her room because I told her that it was empty a while back . I know it is not typical and I wish I knew how to help her

She still makes requests with single words at times but I was told not to be overly concerned about that as long as there is combination of words into phrases.

Ps no one seems to be concerned

She does sound exactly like her peers - as I and other professionals have told you.

Children are exploring how language works. It's a complex puzzle that doesn't always work the way they think it does. Think how often children say "I not do that" or "I seed the sheepses." They think they've learned how something works then overgeneralise it, then learn when the rule doesn't work.

We teach children that some phrases are repeated at certain points in the day.
Good morning
Yum yum
Sleep tight

Your daughter doesn't know why we say these over and over but that "It's empty" is a one-off observation. She has presumably used this phrase successfully as a conversation starter (She said it. You responded) and hasn't worked out that it isn't a habitual phrase. Adults do this all the time. (Doing anything this weekend? Turned out nice again.) And other adults recognise them as empty conversation starters and respond.

You cannot "know in your heart" that she is autistic. You may have suspicions. Noone else can see them. Use your head and evaluate the evidence.

I can say that my daughter was put through the diagnosis which started at 2.5 years of age but it was very very obvious.

Your daughter seems in a developmental range as all children reach milestones at different ages.

I have 4 children and what my oldest child did at 2.5 my youngest did at 18 months etc
All children develop at different rates.
My daughter was unable to say anything at all at the age you are worried about echolia.

Yes the “that’s empty “ phrase is a bit weird but to be fair when she opens a box and there’s nothing there she says “it is empty “ . Don’t know what she uses it to greet us in the morning x

You sound like a really caring mum. Every kid is different whether they are neurodiverse or not. Lots of adults are now just realising they were neurodivergent kids but never knew, and were brought up without reference to it.
Just go with your instincts of what she likes, as you would with other kids.
Even typing this I know that answer would have been frustrating for me to hear too. But there really is no standard change, just be responsive. Gentle parenting (what it really is, not the misinformation) is perfect here.

I really needed to heat that thanks xx

As they did on your previous thread, and the one before that, and the endless (at least once a month, since your child was 16 months from what I’ve seen) threads before that. On your last one you said you’d look at getting help for yourself now and less than a month later you’re back with the same list looking for the same answers. Others have said you sound like a good mum, but to be very harsh this isn’t good parenting. You recognise that your anxiety is out of control and yet you’re not doing anything about it - it will have an effect on your child. She may or may not be autistic, but this is borderline munchausen by proxy at this point. If she’s not autistic, what other conditions will you start obsessing about her having?

Which is exactly why you shouldn't post. It's feeding your obsession to the detriment of both your and your daughters wellbeing.

I agree with this. The issue appears to be you. Not your child. Did you have anxiety before you became a mother? Why not listen to what people are telling you and get some help for yourself. It will benefit you AND your child. Good luck.

If she is on spectrum, then normal part of thing.
It went away after a while.
Had him tested last month for SALT and his expressive scores, language structure, vocabulary and grammar are above average (he is 11).

edit: it doesn't sound like echolalia. That would be it's cold today (question) and child would repeat it.

From what you’ve put in your OP and also being the parent of children with ASD (one diagnosed at 2.5) I wouldn’t be concerned at the moment at all. Sometimes you will see behaviour that as part of a bigger picture can be ASD related but in isolation can just be transient at a certain point in development. Please try not to worry.

I know it is not typical and I wish I knew how to help her

Help her with what though? She sounds fine. Many toddlers that age struggle to communicate and yours is managing fine. Stop looking for issues where there aren’t any and enjoy your child.

I say that as someone who has had 2 ND children, 1 who showed signs of ND from being a baby.

This is another example of a damaging post.

She isn't a caring mum, or at least not in a healthy way. She's obsessed with her daughter being autistic. She's constantly watching for it, pushing for it, taking her to Dr's for it, discussing it.

If posters aren't aware of the op's posting history then they can make kind posts like this one without realizing they are legitimizing a damaging obsession.

I know there's an argument for telling the OP not to worry and that her child is fine ( autistic or not ) but the OP is not listening to most posts and latching onto validating ones.

I've reported this thread, I hope others will too...

You are too analytical about your child. Burn the books, stop researching online and go splash in some puddles with her!

I also recognise your posts and am going to be very clear and honest with you. I find your posts distressing.

I have an autistic daughter who is nearly four. She has a tiny handful of words. We have never had a professionals meeting for her which did not end with the professional quietly telling us that she is almost certainly autistic. She has been red flagged within the system many times for the level of her needs and yet, we still have not had our paediatrician review.

After 2 1/2 years on the waiting list we paid for a private diagnosis so that she will qualify for high needs funding when she starts school. She will start with an EHCP and will almost certainly have to be in a specialist resource base.

She is loved to bits and is our wild and lovely child. All we can do is accompany her through life, be proud and loving and work with her to achieve each new goal, however small that might seem to others.

I don't know what you think will happen or change if you can get your clearly strongly held concerns validated, but nothing will happen, nothing will change. You need to stop asking. Stop feeding the anxiety monster, get outside and let your daughter get on with becoming whoever she is meant to be, and then love the socks off her however that is.

Btw, if you keep this up OP you will create issues for your child that wouldn’t otherwise exist. Not autism (which you seem to really want your child to be diagnosed with) but anxiety most likely. As someone who is clearly an anxious person yourself you surely don’t want your child to be anxious and worried all the time. As I said above, enjoy your child as they are.

I didn't know of posting history. So just to give background to the OP.
I was a nanny when younger and when my child 1 arrived knew something was 'off'.
I took him to meet family at about two weeks old. He screamed his head off being passed around. He hasn't slept through till he was 5.
He was constantly on the go and very highly verbal.
He did things like trying to climb from windows when he was in Fireman Sam stage, because he copied the story.
It was nursery who flagged the concerns about his social play (I didn't say anything at all).
GP referred us but was told huge waiting list so also booked private.
Private paediatrician diagnosed him. As it happened NHS paediatrician appointment arrived the next month and as I wanted to make sure I didn't tell them about private diagnosis.
Diagnosed by NHS on first appointment.

I absolutely agree with this. Many of us have had worries at some point or another about our child's development. However the obsession this poster has with her daughter having autism/afrid/adhd is quite frankly disturbing and she seems to have little awareness of how harmful a self diagnosis can be on her child or how this obsessive thinking can impact her daughter. She speaks about her daughter as if she's some sort of laboratory project, constantly analysing and evaluating her and looking for problems and with no sense of warmth, care or enjoying her daughter for who she is.

Excellent post.

When DS was around 19 months, I was MILDLY concerned he had very few words and didn’t use them in context but I realised he didn’t really ‘get’ what language was even for at that age. As soon as I started to teach him that words were a useful tool to get what he wants, his talking came on really quickly.

So for example, if he pointed at something because he wanted it, I would ask him to at least make an effort to say the word. ‘Milk’ was ‘Ma’ for example. All of a sudden his little brain clicked that language would be useful for him and his speech proceeded as normal. He is now 7 and nobody jas any concerns about him, least of all me

Some kids just pick up on a phrase that is used and run with it, it means nothing really.

Your daughter definitely sounds like she's within the range of normal development, don't forget even with NT kids there is a huge range of "normal" some are speaking in sentences at 15 months ,others don't til they're 3. Some are walking at 9 months and some don't til they're 18 months, very very different but all are developing normally.

I wish I knew how to help her

You can help your daughter @Ladybug1235 by getting help for yourself.

I have read some of your other threads.
You are the one who needs help, not your daughter. She sounds like a normal little girl, if she ends up with issues it will be because of you. You are not being a loving, supportive parent to her by continuing to act like this, by refusing to simply enjoy her and allow her to be a normal toddler.

I know that sounds harsh, I'm not normally so blunt, but I think it's needed here. Because we're talking about the wellbeing of a very small child here, and you're not acting in her best interests. I agree with others, your posts are very disturbing, it does seem like this is bordering on a munchausen by proxy situation. It's not normal to analyse your child to the extent you do, and to want so desperately to find something wrong with her. Everyone else, including professionals who've seen her, see a toddler developing at a rate that's normal for her age.

I hope people in your life recognise you need help and intervene before you cause harm (psychologically/emotionally) to her, and you will if you continue in this manner.

raspberrieswithchocolate is right.

I know this might feel hard to accept, but if you really care about your child you must go and talk to someone about your high level of anxiety. Your child will benefit if you do, and I am sure that this is what you want.

I think what's important to understand, OP, is that this level of anxiety isn't healthy even if your child does turn out at some point to have additional needs. At the moment you need to focus on working with and accepting her as she comes and sitting with the uncertainty that the future holds. You need to do that whether she has autism or anything else or nothing is. I would get some help with that.

You post this or similar every week, you get the same answers every week. I don't know what you're looking for. She sounds normal, kids learn in all sorts of ways, they play in all sorts of ways, they communicate in all sorts of ways. There a huge spectrum of behaviour and most of it is well within the boundaries of "normal".

I think you need to see your GP for your anxiety or find a therapist.

I am a Teacher of the Deaf. I spend my working life focusing on children's language development and supporting it. I have given you some input on how to support your daughter's language and you haven't taken any notice. Your daughter's language is good from what you're telling us. I can't see any examples of her using echolalia from what you have posted.

This is probably more down to developing cognition rather than pure linguistic ability, no?

It's easier for little kids if you ask them concrete things like do you want X or y