I can’t believe my friend *[content warning: concerns child abuse]

[bloomerf]

We’ve been friends since 12 were 26 now. My friend has been in a relationship with this guy for 2 years. I understand she’s and adult and will make her own decisions. This guy she has been dating who is not the bio dad to her son she has been letting him discipline him. I don’t mean take away his iPad I mean serious discipline.

The other day I spoke on the phone for a few and she told me she lets him discipline her son. She was upset with her bf because he made her 4 year old stand for hours in soiled clothes because he lied about peeing in the bed. I could not believe what the hell I was hearing. I don’t give input unless asked but what the actual fuck??

I have asked her what her plans are and she just keeps telling me she loves him and he’s a good guy. I’m sorry I’m so furious because to me that’s not acceptable. Am I too involved or is this shit like not ok???

I don't think having a go at OP is going to help. Last thing we want is for them to be scared off.

OP I hope you use this advice and please update us once you've reported! Alot of us are worried for this boy.

Come back and update if you can

I will update

I was going to say the most recent trials in the news of poor kids who have been killed by parents or step parents have included making children stand in one spot for prolonged periods of time. This is vile and is not acceptable but could also escalate. Report report report

Hi I agree with all the posters saying you must report to SS and school, and I also think you should talk to your friend about how you see this and ask her to put her child first and leave this man. Blended families can and do work well but so many people also have horror stories about their mum letting men who did not love them into their lives and ruining childhoods. Give the little lad a good chance in life and do everything you can to get this man out of it.

If this is true, get off sm and get help for the child.

I have contacted the child abuse hotline and will also be stopping by the local office in my town at 8am. With it being so early I will give her parents a call in a few hours.

And? Did you speak to someone in person? That was quick

I spoke with an agent I will be stopping by the office to speak with someone in person when the offices are open.

Please do everything you can to safe guard this child. And also your friend she may also be mistreated.

Report to NSPCC.
TODAY!

I came from an insanely strict background. This is not discipline is it child abuse.

I would absolutely be contacting the authorities / SS / speaking to my family members who are SS to get advice on how to handle.

Say nothing and this will soon be a news story with a dead child and your friend looking at serious jail time.

I don’t get parents who allow their new partner to discipline their child. I really don’t.

She has contacted the authorities and is making a proper effort to get this dealt with urgently, read the thread, please don't slam her by saying she waited too long etc. She knows that but is doing the right thing now and should be supported in this. She has said she will update.
NSPCC is not relevant, she is in the US.

The parent that lets another adult abuse their child as does nothing to stop it needs the book thrown at them too. This woman would be no friend of mine. I would make sure I distanced myself thoroughly from her once I was satisfied that the child was somewhere safe. That poor little one.