Nothing for Mother's Day

[Rina1971]

My 18 year old daughter excelled herself today. She stayed out to 4am, got up at 8am shouted Happy Mother's Day and that was it. I feel devastated and hurt. She knew when Mother's Day was, we reminded her and she confirmed to DP she had it sorted. Now she is acting all wounded as though me wanting some acknowledgement is a major inconvenience to her.

If you’ve taken her hangover remedies then more fool you! If she’s old enough to stay out til early hours then she’s old enough to get up and get some tablets, drink etc. If she was genuinely unwell I can understand running after her but not something that’s self inflicted.

See - i get what folks are saying when they say that it's a made up thing ... but ... it is quite a big main stream 'made up thing'.

It's a thing which has been going for years now and is a thing which, unless you all agree that the made upness of it makes it NOT a thing in your family is unusual to ignore.

I mean i like it. Made up thing or rooted in history thing, i like giving my mum a card and a hug on mother's day just to say thanks.

The problems start when one person's expectations (reasonable ones based on what's been done in previous years perhaps) aren't met. And with no prior discussion.

and happy mother's day x

It's rude and disrespectful. It's not abut spending money it's about making someone feel appreciated but you don't want it to be dutiful you want it to be heartfelt.

Shouting happy mothers day would irritate me more than it not being said at all.

As petty as iti might sound I would have to retaliate in some way. Eg birthday give her the same treatment.

My 21 year old bought me a hair dryer. He just so happened to have broken mine and needed to replace it. Killing 2 birds with 1 stone was the way he put it 😂😂

In the nicest way possible, why on earth are you on call for hangover remedies?! Self-inflicted, self-heal and that is just normal. You need to stop that for a start and she needs to grow up and show some appreciation.

My 17 year old DS’s response to asking if he has anything to say to me today was in
line with this…..He said I’d die for you any day, today is no different!
It’s possibly the nicest thing anyone’s ever said to me 😂😂

This. ^

Sorry you got nothing @Rina1971 Mine went through a period of not being arsed with bothering with DH and me when it came to Mothers Day and Fathers Day - even forgot a couple of birthdays - when they were between 17 and 20. Was whilst at Uni. Grew up a bit though, and realised it was hurtful to be forgotten. Broke my heart when they didn't bother, as my own mother died some years before, so Mothers Day was empty, as I had no mother to buy for and nothing from my DC. It only happened a couple of times, and they've been great since.

I'm sure yours will improve in a few years OP. HAPPY MOTHERS DAY to you.......

Even centuries ago it was about going home to visit your mother.

Yes you are right!

But it was about going back to your nether church, not hallmark cards and tat.

Made up twaddle!

Enterprising! Well done on raising him that way.

No it's not!

I’ve raised an indulged child by running round them the they’ve got a hangover. I’m then going to complain that they are selfish and indulged…

Yes it is! It’s not about “ mothers” history was rewritten!

Your poor mum. I wonder if she finds your birthday is also a "silly" thing to celebrate maybe that's where all this negativity about Mother's Day is coming from...?

Never did anything other than a hand made card when very young for Mother’s Day when I was growing up. My mother never did anything for her mother. My kids made me a card which is lovely. I dreaded any other fuss being made as the thought of breakfast in bed is grim, and I don’t want any expense spared on chocolate or flowers as it’s just spending money for the sake of spending money.

I find it great that my kids do nothing, but then again I’m a grown up and know my kids love me.

Some really mean-spirited and bitter comments on here aren't there?

Some serious projection going on!

I organise every Christmas, every Easter, every birthday (including my own). Yeah I expect one day a year to be people thinking about me! It's not too much to ask. You are not unreasonable for wanting them to remember it's plastered across every supermarket for about 6 weeks before hand. A bunch of flowers and "what do you want to do today mum" is not fucking unreasonable.

My kids appreciate me. I don't need anything.

Just for the record, I would be upset too.

i don’t expect (or get) much but it’s a token of appreciation on ONE DAY OF THE YEAR which shows that your child/ren care, that they love and appreciate you, and everything you do for them.

If some of you commenters on here can’t see that, and think it’s okay to get your mother nothing, not even a card, then I think you need to grow and stop being so damned selfish. Perhaps try imagining how your mother might feel…

My son said happy Mother’s Day then I need to go out. I told him not to bother getting the dregs of a card if he couldn’t have been bothered before now.

One day for some acknowledgment isn’t too much to ask is it? I took myself to the gym and M&S for some nice food for myself as he is going to work later. I got home and he’s bought some tulips and chocolate but couldn’t be bothered to give them to me.

Cue a huge row about respect and being a selfish prick

I had cards from 2 of my children. It's my birthday soon so I'm not expecting any presents for today.

Ds was supposed to cook me dinner but he looks and feels awful so DH did it instead.

Not all mothers care ...mine isn't bothered but I send her a card anyway.

Equally I'm not fussed either, and my kids know this as I've always said not to bother - I know they love and appreciate me every day. They always wish me a happy mother's day though, sometimes I get a small gift sometimes I don't. This year my son surprised me by visiting with flowers and a bottle of wine, but that is unusual!

I didn’t get a card or any real acknowledgment of the day except a text mid afternoon.

It's not! People used to go back to their mothering church and spend time with their mothers. They used to cook for them, pick flowers, bake etc - it's been going on since medieval times.

Mother's Day in the UK is not a modern phenomenon - it's been happening for centuries