To think beige kids dinners are fine?

[reachermarry]

Scrolling FB today and seen a video come up from a mum of 2 and what she gave her kids for good during the day.

cereal for breakfast with option of fruit/veg

picky bits for lunch, on this occasion included a sandwich, Dairylea dunkers, a pack of fridge raiders, banana, an angel cake slice.

for dinner the child had, fish fingers, chips, peas.

for pudding was given a fromage frais and a mini Maryland bag of cookies.

Now I am not sure how old the child was as there was no mention, but the comments were horrendous, comments were saying how she should be done for neglect because of the ultra processed food she’s feeding her kid.

What’s your views on it?

I’ll start, I see nothing wrong with this diet, maybe breakfast could be a little more filling, perhaps an option of something else on the side, but that’s just my child, I know some kids don’t like big brekkies.

I can’t be the only one especially growing up in the lower/working class families, that had a diet consisting of quick save chips, and pizza/sausages surely?

How is that worse than a day of cake, biscuits, breadsticks, fake cheese, reconstituted chicken, fingers and chips?

Not the worst is a pretty low bar isn’t it? I mean “ it was only ABH but GBH wouldn’t cut it with a potential boyfriend would it? But ABH isn’t the worst - it’s still not ok

we need to be aiming for good enough

This is what I was trying to say, i do see how parts of it aren’t great, but I don’t think it warrants abuse online.

I will admit I’ve fed my child these things; not everyday but she has ate them, and I’ve did so with no guilt; it’s quick and easy, they’re great picnic foods to just grab from the local tesco and head straight to the park.

of course not everyday, but I don’t stipulate is it ok to feed a child this everyday, I do think though once on an occasion isn’t going to be the end if the world.

Weird definition of 'the real world'. The real world has people who live on crisps and Fanta and people who cook and eat relatively healthy food. Neither is uncommon or more real or unreal than the other.

Its a bit shit isn't it? Lot of empty processed carbs. Depends rather what's in the sandwich, but seems to be lacking in anything like enough f&v, proteins, fibre etc.
It's not crazy awful, but if that is an average day then it is nutritionally lacking imo.

The fat children are not usually the ones at the absolute bottom of the financial heap

I'd love if my child ate a healthy varied diet but he has Arfid so its as beige as you can get. All I can do is try to make as much of beige myself so at least I know what's in it!

Deprivation isn’t having a coke for breakfast and a takeaway every day. Can we stop pretending this shit choices are down to finances?

Frankly justifying and normalising day of utter garbage as ‘not too bad’ is a huge part of the problem.

That looks like a poor diet from a lazy parent.

Cubes of cheddar would still be 'beige' but a whole lot healthier than Dairylea!
I may have fed that kind of crap to my kids in an emergency but it was certainly never their daily diet.

And I'm 38 and grew up skint but on a farm. We didn't have processed food as it was too expensive, we ate meat and vegetables for dinner. Cold meat and bread/ maybe salad for lunch and cereal or toast with butter/jam for breakfast snacks. Fruit is expensive so occasional, ditto salad unless it was in season. Cheese yes but not freely available to just snack on, it was expensive and a big block would last a week or 2.
Drank squash, Fizzy stuff for birthdays.
Puddings would be homemade stodge or ice cream.

Healthier than I eat now tbh!
Probably not as many veg as we should have had ideally but I'd guess 2 or 3 good portions every day and sometimes more. Carrots and peas were a basic go to.

This is a terrible diet and not what I would ever feed my children.
Nothing makes online abuse ok.

Both can be true.

It seems like the video sparked a lot of debate! The reality is that everyone has different opinions on what's "healthy" for kids, and a lot of it can come down to personal experience, upbringing, and beliefs about nutrition.

Some people might see meals like the ones described as too processed and worry about the long-term health impacts, but it’s also important to remember that kids' diets don't have to be perfect every day. In fact, many of us grew up eating pretty similar foods (think fish fingers, chips, and maybe a chocolate bar or two as a treat), and we turned out okay.

What’s key is balance. A child can have the odd processed meal and still be healthy if they’re getting a variety of nutrients throughout the day. If it's not every meal and there’s room for fruits, veggies, and other wholesome foods, then there might not be any real harm. It’s also important to recognize that parents often make choices based on what their child will actually eat—especially if they’re picky!

I think it all comes down to moderation. Some days are more indulgent than others, and that’s totally fine. I don’t believe it's neglect, but maybe a bit of over-judging from people who don’t know the whole picture. What’s your take on the comments though? Would love to hear your thoughts!

This really shouldn't need to be explained.

Fruit was offered with breakfast, the cereal probably had added vitamins and came with milk.

Versus a packet of crisps and a can of coke. There's no nutritional value whatsoever in the second option.

Lunch included a sandwich, banana, cheese and chicken.

Versus a bag of six packets of crisps. Crisps have no nutritional value.

Dinner had fish and vegetables. Desert included fromage frais.

Versus a bucket of fried chicken.

Do you see the difference?

Of course junk calories are cheap -

many people think themselves hard up and needing to buy cheap treats because they don’t prioritise healthy food over that new game or dress or hair do

but we also do have the very poor people tend to also be very stressed which can make it hard for them to make good choices and have the energy left to cook a cheap yet nutritious dinner

something like 60% of the population are overweight and somewhere between 10 and 20% are what I would classify as the very poor who will struggle to afford good food - so most overweight people are not there because of absolute poverty

I'm also finding it depressing. My eldest isn't fuzzy at all. OK, he could maybe eat a bit more veg but he generally eats most things. My next one is autistic. She started eating how her brother did, then barely ate anything for years other than fruit, veg and chips. Now she will eat better but it can't be mixed in together. The third has copied her sister and got fuzzier as she got older but likes different things. Processed crap is pretty much the only thing I can feed all of them together so it's tough! I try my best but spend most my life feeling like I'm failing. Judgmental threads like this make me feel shit and remind me that some parenting journeys are far more difficult than others.

I can’t get worked out about what other people eat. It’s not exactly the healthiest diet I guess but I’m sick of holier than thou types complaining about upf. Our ancestors ate cleaner food and still died of cancer and other illnesses. It’s certainly not neglect.

no one would say it’s ok to hit someone because you kiss fhem

in the same way it’s not ok to feed a chuld
junk because you offer fruit and chicken

It's not finances, however on the whole it is low income families that are doing this. It's an education and society thing.

If all around you, kids are being given smiley faces, Peppa Pig spaghetti hoops and turkey aeroplanes for dinner, every time you go the playground kids are clutching bags of Doritos or being given cookies and bags of sweets... and you go to cafe's/restaurant and ask for the kids menu and it's all a selection from;
Chicken nuggets, fish fingers, sausage burgers, pizza, tomato pasta (almost always with chips) you normalise this and it's a kind of vicious circle.
You head into Iceland and pick up the bags of potato shapes, the packs of chicken nuggets etc all because you've been conditioned to think "this is what kids eat"... It starts at weaning. You go to the "baby food" aisle and choose a few jars, a plastic microwave meal, a bag of "baby crisps", a packet of "baby" biscuits... There's even "baby" squash....It's all utter junk.... Then you move onto the food section.... It's all Thomas the tank engine spaghetti shapes, Barney Bear cakes, lunchables, smiley faces ... All the stuff you had as a kid.

At what point in life do you think to go to the fresh fish counter and this "ah yes, I'll have some fresh mackerel, a few cuts of salmon ..oh no, actually let's try some trout this week, that should go nicely with the broccoli and buttered new potatoes I need to use up"

some people who don’t smoke die of lung cancer - would you see that a reason to smoke ?

more and more are dying of cancer because of their crap diets

if you could halve the number of people would will die this year from cancer you would see that as a good thing .. and we could if we ate better and exercised more

The point is surely not whether this is bad parenting but whether the child can be healthy on that as a regular diet.

What’s your take on the comments though? Would love to hear your thoughts!

Is this an AI comment?

This is great timing going alongside the thread about understanding obesity.

So yeah, feeding kids this highly processed, addictive “beige” food is part of the obesity epidemic and is linked to lower socioeconomic status. I don’t agree with hounding mothers trying to just get through the day but it is a real problem.

Swap the fridge raiders and dunkers for a piece of cheese and it's fine.

Quite
DS won't eat lunch at school though. We have tried everything. He hates the experience of eating at school. Having arguments and meltdowns over it doesn't help. The dinner staff are not trained and paid to force him to eat. We've had discussions with school about his lunch and it's understood just to let him get on with crisps and a cake because something is better than nothing.

At home he does eat now. He still avoids fruit and veg. Having a fruit allergy we didn't realise may have contributed to this. And veg, he's getting better at. He now loves mushrooms and will eat chicken in vegetable sauces. Carrots and leeks are acceptable in pies. But we've made a break through with mushrooms. Peanut butter goes on toast. And he bizarrely likes seaweed! Which is a major victory. All this has taken time. A lot of it is about smells and textures (eating at school is not a pleasurable experience. He hates the smells of other people's lunch boxes and just wants to go play).

He did really well on school residential and was less fussy than a lot of the other kids which really highlights how far he's come.

He's always ironically refused beige food. He just didn't eat. It's been a battle.

So I completely get the weirdness of others maybe judging his lunchbox and difficulties with fussiness. But I also think just opening packets is just giving up too if you have a fussy child. It's a long term thing you have to keep at. It's ultimately an abdication of responsibility to just give up and do it all the time. And yes actually much more expensive.

And hell I do like a good beige buffet once in a blue moon. I make a point of doing it over Christmas when I know neither DH or I cant be arsed to cook for at least one or two days.

Everything in moderation and don't abdicate long term responsibility and just give up on food. It's important.