To think that most relationships would improve if women stopped mothering their partners?

[FunnyMentor]

If you treat him like a child, don’t be surprised when he acts like one.

You're not wrong

If my partner started treating me like a child, the last thing I'd do was act like one. I'd be very keen to assert myself as an equal adult in the relationship and if he refused to accept that, I'd leave him. So I find it very hard to imagine that all these men are being forced into immaturity against their will by weird women who want to infantilise them. I think some men act like children because it's easier and they're lazy.

Or to reframe…

Most relationships would improve if men stopped behaving like pathetic man-children.

Yes, let's blame the women. 🙄

My husband lost his mother in his late 20s. Do I mother him? No - but have I taken over some of the things she used to do, like remind him of birthdays etc ? Yes. And yes, you could argue that he should remember things like that himself as an adult, but he was so traumatised seeing his mother die in a slow and painful way that anything I can do to help him is the right thing to do. He should've had counselling, but didn't - and is in a much better place now. He's a fantastic father, works hard and is a good man. It's no skin off my nose to help him remember birthdays and make sure he carries on getting the same things at Christmas as he always has etc.

Bingo!

There are far too many pathetic man children out there.

But why are so many women attracted to them?

That's what I find weird. It must be like literally dating a child.

0/10

THIS^

I do think it would be a glorious time to be a divorce lawyer though if all the women married to pathetic man-children were to call time on the marriage.

Men need to stop acting like children, man children are not attractive.

There's a thread at the moment which is very enlightening. A woman asked her husband of two decades to arrange a surprise for her birthday and she's had scores of women scoffing at the idea that a man would be capable of such a Herculean task.

I married a man, not a boy. And he was trained to be that way. Why aren’t dads preparing their sons to be men? I certainly prepare DD to be a woman.

Of course he’s not British…

What does not being British have to do with it?

There are good and bad men all over the world.

Some are immature dicks and some are not.

@TeapotTitties I must admit when we lived in Copenhagen I saw an awful lot more men taking kids out on their own and managing children when families were out together or clearly doing domestic work around the house and home, it was noticeable

Ok but you'll see an awful lot of men doing the same thing in all different countries.

And probably just as many doing far less in all different countries.

Because they are like used car sales men...amazing with the initial offering and sealing the deal, but lack any form of aftercare.
By then it's too late, you're stuck with a useless banger that you can't afford to upgrade.

Not always. In many cases they're useless, lazy twats from the start.

You're not stuck with them though.

Stop mothering them and they'll see themselves out the door eventually.

My earnings would not cover the bills, even with CMS (which wouldn't cover childcare fees) so for now no upgrade

I think quite a few relationships would founder.

Some people go straight from their parents' home to a partner or spouse and expect that same level of caretaking from the partner rather than being an independently functional adult. It's not just men expecting to be taken care of either.

Exactly! But you do have to set your stall out at the start. My now DH started off being a bit pathetic when we first moved in together. “Wasn’t sure” how the washer worked, “ wasn’t very good” at cooking. I told him he was going to have no clean clothes and eat a lot of sandwiches then because I wasn’t doing it all for him, why would I? We both worked ft. He sorted it sharpish and now does more than I do a lot of the time.

Wow man haters are out in force tonight

That’s your imagination.

In my observed experience it is absolutely this.

Much better, thanks.