Mothers day

[InBedBy10]

After years of being dissapointed on mothers day i have taken the bull by the horns this year and told my children I want a present for tomorrow. I'm not asking for alot. A cheap bunch of flowers from lidl or a cheap box of chocolates. A token gift to acknowledge the day really. I'd love it if they could do this without me having to tell them but here we are. My ex was useless organising anything for mothers day and since I became a single mam, no ones here to remind them.

I know my kids love and appreciate me, I just think mothers can be taken for granted. So I've decided its down to me to teach them how to show that appreciation. They are actually excited to go out and pick a 'surprise' for me.

I know MN is going to be full of disappointed mothers tomorrow. So if you've a useless partner or no partner like me. Maybe take my lead and give them a nudge today.

Absolutely second this! DS is still young so I make it fun. We go to a shop, I point out what I like, exaggeratedly ask what important days are coming up I could get it for, make sure he has enough cash in his wallet and pretend to look away while he goes to a till. Then at home, I set up craft stuff to make a card and ask what’s coming up that might need a card and leave him giggling away. He needs a million reminders to keep it secret and hidden til the day but actually it’s a funny tradition we both love, and well worth it!

I think this is great!

Children learn from us. When I was in a relationship I always made the effort for fathers day. Sadly he never bothered for me and it felt weird arranging my own presents so my kids learned they didn't have to bother for me. Well that's changing this year.

Is it not more to do with recognising social patterns of behaviour? Learning? When DD was little her DF wouldn't have thought to get her a card to give me on birthdays etc and it feels pathetic making a big fuss of your own birthday or Mothers Day. People have to teach children what's polite and what matters in that particular family.

I don’t think you are being unreasonable at all. It must be very upsetting and hurtful not to have Mother’s Day acknowledged even in a small sense when you know other Mums are getting the full works, especially.

You really need to not be so rude!!

I agree, it is an honour and privilege to be their Mother, but I don't think its too much to ask that our DC take one day a year to let their Mum know how much they love and appreciate them and how special they are.

And yes, a thanks IS sometimes required and recognition for the sacrifices and unconditional love that a Mum provides.

Not much to ask for the DC to get a card and some chocolates if its important to the OP which it obviously it. She is not being ridiculous at all.

I've decided its down to me to teach them how to show that appreciation

I've given exactly this advice on another thread today (and hope the OP takes it).

Did you not give your mum gifts/card on Mother’s Day as a child?

That sounds very very cute.

Are you religious?
Since Mother's Day actually does not exist in the UK.
It was previously Mothering Sunday, when people went back to the church, where they originally worshipped.
Mother's Day does exist in much of the world, but it often at the beginning of May.

I rather think you need to get a life. Is the one you’re currently living pleasant? Spending time being rude to strangers on the internet for wanting a nice Mother’s Day?

Exactly. Mothering Sunday is always the 4th Sunday in Lent where you return to your mother church where you were raised and originally worshipped.

It isn't a stupid greeting card holiday and shouldnt have been turned into one.

Why not? Some people enjoy “stupid greeting card holidays”. Myself included. Incidentally, what makes it stupid?

I always tell my 3 that I’m their Mum everyday and I don’t need thanking
Having said that, I have just had a box delivered from Moonpig.
DS1 didn’t even realise, so I think DS2 and DP. It matters to them so I’m grateful.

Of course it ‘exists’ 😂

It’s obviously changed meaning from what it originally was to how it looks today; But it’s celebrated by millions of people in the UK just as other smaller commercialised holidays (eg Fathers Day, Valentines Day) are.

It still is Mothering Sunday and was a tradition for domestic servants to visit their own church with their family especially mothers.
You don’t have to be religious to celebrate a festival held every year in your own country, it’s been known as Mother’s Day for a long time.

Pandering to your mother just because hallmark wants to make money.

I didn't need a specific date to appreciate my mother.

What do you mean by “doesn’t exist”?

It’s not some physical thing that is present in other countries but not here. It’s a day that people give presents to their mothers if they want - how does that not exist? I personally don’t do anything for Mother’s Day, but to claim it doesn’t exist just because it has a different origin doesn’t make any sense

I have also given my son 'present training' from about the age of 10.
Not just for mothers day and not just for me.
He's 21 this year. The last three years or so I've left him to his own devices. I have a collection of 'interesting ' presents all gratefully received, a few really thoughtful things which have actually made me cry. He's still useless at wrapping.
He is away at uni. I haven't had a card but I have had a beautifully packaged gift which shows me that he's really thought about me and what's going on in my life at the moment.
He has ASD and finds this stuff quite hard so I'm thrilled.
I'm taking this as a good indicator that he will be appreciative of his future partner.

Still a long way to go on housework though!!

How do you know I’m pandering? I buy my mother presents and celebrate her on that day because I want to. It’s lovely and I have some very fond memories of childhood Mothers Days. No pandering here.

Mothering Sunday starts to become Mothers Day from the very early 1900s onwards, culture is always shifting and evolving and it was part of this.

Hallmark Brothers Inc was founded in 1923, after that shift had already begun.

Why so bitter?

I don't really care if other places have Mother's Day in May. We have it in March, thanks, depending when Easter falls.

I'm really not bothered about presents and cards, my kids will sometimes surprise me with a treat throughout the year (middle son brought me some crisps and a dip that he knows I love the other day) or they will treat me to lunch. I will pop and see my mum tomorrow and I've bought her a houseplant but she's not bothered about gifts either, she'd rather just spend time with me and her grandchildren. I do think Mother's Day has got ridiculous and commercialised - when I was a kid most mothers got a homemade card and that was it!

Fucking hell, there's some extremely bitter people on here.
I will celebrate Mother's Day with my Mum, Dad, husband, and siblings tomorrow. I've got cards and gifts for my Mum and my sisters. Not 'pandering', just an opportunity to show my love and appreciation, and to do so in a fantastic restaurant.

I don't need a specific date to appreciate my Mother. Or my Father, or husband, or siblings, or my amazing uncle. But it's nice to have a day to really celebrate someone important, so I love it.

🖕