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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

CMS age limit

256 replies

RhaenysRocks · 25/03/2025 07:23

First of all , can I plead that we keep this thread focused on the issue at hand, not all the other myriad "what about x" issues with CMS.
Currently, CMS ends when a child is 18 or leaves full time FE (but not HE). Given that very few people are now able to be financially independent of parents until at least early twenties, especially with the current situation with rents, zero hours contracts, difficulties for young people to get full time, decent employment, AIBU to argue that the rules around CMS should change. The devil is in the detail of course, but realistically, many RPs will be hosting their adult children for 3-5 years longer than traditionally was the case. If the NRP is not willing or able to have them stay 50/50 should there be an obligation to continue to support them in that case, even if it was a direct payment to the child from whom the RP then elicits rent? I really don't want a bunfight or a "I left at 16 and never looked back". It's 2025, the world has changed and even the brightest, most driven kids are often still at home beyond the age of CB.

OP posts:
Snoopdoggydog123 · 26/03/2025 19:38

Starlightstarbright4 · 26/03/2025 18:04

Rp don’t get to opt out . What a ridiculous thing to say🤷‍♂️

Yes they do. There are options.

Starlightstarbright4 · 26/03/2025 19:42

Snoopdoggydog123 · 26/03/2025 19:38

Yes they do. There are options.

My Ds turns 18 next month - no one helps him at all. He has a medication review at Camhs .

i can tell you next month nothing will change . Him been kicked out would absolutely destroy him . You live in a fantasy world if you think there are residential care for everyone who has additional needs.

services have done nothing for many years .

Staceysmum2025 · 27/03/2025 18:55

CaptainFuture · 25/03/2025 21:58

I'd rather teach my kids that anyone who was shallow enough to judge someone for needing to wear glasses wasn't worth knowing or engaging with.

You are missing the point. I didn’t spend the money not being able to afford it and therefore if our family can afford it, why should it not be spent on the child?
Imagine buying yourself beautiful clothes and glasses and trainers, but your child’s walking around like a second class citizen.

No mother would ever allow it

Gogogo12345 · 28/03/2025 14:35

Starlightstarbright4 · 26/03/2025 19:42

My Ds turns 18 next month - no one helps him at all. He has a medication review at Camhs .

i can tell you next month nothing will change . Him been kicked out would absolutely destroy him . You live in a fantasy world if you think there are residential care for everyone who has additional needs.

services have done nothing for many years .

That's because you are there to care for him. If you couldn't/ wouldn't then the authorities would have no option but to sort it out. What will happen when you die?

Dramatic · 28/03/2025 14:39

After having an awful time recently trying to persuade my ex he should contribute to our daughter's uni costs I would definitely be behind this.

Staceysmum2025 · 29/03/2025 07:13

Gogogo12345 · 28/03/2025 14:35

That's because you are there to care for him. If you couldn't/ wouldn't then the authorities would have no option but to sort it out. What will happen when you die?

The authorities don’t sort out thousands and thousands of children and people. Do you think people end up homeless or dead drug addicts?

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