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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Employee hasn't liked her role for the past 4 years

127 replies

holidayblues25 · 24/03/2025 16:46

I started in my new role as manager 6 months ago and she just came back from ML.

My manager (who used to manage her) just told me she hasn't been happy for many, many years, but that she has stayed even though it's very apparent she isn't happy.

We're thinking of starting to involve HR as her quality of work is subpar (she's already been on a PIP before).

I'm new to this role so don't really know how to proceed. When it happened to me, my then manager told me she's help me "leave" (although my circumstances were slightly different).

So AIBU to think we need to build a case? Being unhappy is obviously not a reason for dismissal. Or somebody has to be brutally honest with her, but that might backfire.

OP posts:
Enjoytherush · 24/03/2025 16:46

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Enjoytherush · 24/03/2025 16:47

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holidayblues25 · 24/03/2025 16:48

I'm new in this type of role yeah. My previous experience was with outsourced employees so a very different set up.

OP posts:
PauliesWalnuts · 24/03/2025 16:48

You need to find out why she is unhappy, surely? That’s what performance reviews are for.

YesHonestly · 24/03/2025 16:49

You’re about to put a woman who has just returned from Mat Leave on a PIP and build a case to have her dismissed?

Good luck with that one.

Enjoytherush · 24/03/2025 16:50

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holidayblues25 · 24/03/2025 16:54

PauliesWalnuts · 24/03/2025 16:48

You need to find out why she is unhappy, surely? That’s what performance reviews are for.

She says it was bait and switch. The role she was originally hired for (5 years ago) was made redundant within a year. She's been unhappy ever since because she doesn't think the current role matches her skills. But the alternative that I gave her, doesn't match them either.

OP posts:
holidayblues25 · 24/03/2025 17:01

YesHonestly · 24/03/2025 16:49

You’re about to put a woman who has just returned from Mat Leave on a PIP and build a case to have her dismissed?

Good luck with that one.

I actually don't want to, but at the same time it's odd to have someone who has been unhappy for a very long time, when different people have been honest to her (about other options) and she just comes back to say her skillset is not being used properly.

I've been in that situation before and I just left as soon as I could.

OP posts:
Enjoytherush · 24/03/2025 17:03

How about you form your own opinion about her

rather than just lapping up everything her previous manager says

Jellycatspyjamas · 24/03/2025 17:04

Being unhappy at work is ok, and it sounds like she has good reason. Underperforming or behaving inappropriately at work isn’t. You need to separate out what’s about performance/behaviour from her happiness at work.

If she feels there’s a skills gap can you provide training? If it’s that she doesn’t like the job she needs to decide to stay or go, and she needs supported to perform in the meantime.

Given she’s just back from maternity leave it may be worth seeing how she is and getting your own sense of what she needs. Life will have changed for her and what she needs from her job now may be different.

I’d be very wary of starting a PiP with someone just back from maternity leave, let her get her feet under the desk first. I’d also be wary that your manager is making bullets for you to fire. She’s managed her for years and hasn’t changed things so you can’t be expected to fix it within such a short time.

Make your own assessment based on where she is now.

Strawberriesandmelons · 24/03/2025 17:05

I think you might need to think objectively.

ThinWomansBrain · 24/03/2025 17:06

"just returned" - how recently exactly?

You need to allow reasonable time for her to adjust back into the role - and for you to make an assessment of her work and approach.
If she can't do the job, why has it been allowed to go on for four years
Are notes available from the previous PIP - have they been made available to you.

If you are expected to manage the process, you should be making a judgement yourself as her line manager, not doing it because someone has told you the employee is not happy./subpar - or was a year ago before their mat leave.

If nothing else, she needs to demonstrate her capability now - not pre ,mat leave
And if it comes to anything, it should be well clear of the mat leave to avoid a tribunal for unfair dismissal.

Depending on your orgs mat policy, she may only stay for the minimum period required to avoid having to repay maternity pay.

TeenLifeMum · 24/03/2025 17:08

wtf?
speak to her. what does she enjoy in her work, what doesn’t she like, what does she find hard, what does she find frustrating?

then you can speak to her about where her work can be improved and discuss what support she needs to get there.

why are you going straight to pip having spoken to her old manager behind her back and not speaking to her?! Maybe her last manager was shit. This is your chance to get to know her and see if you can provide the leadership to bring her around.

holidayblues25 · 24/03/2025 17:10

Jellycatspyjamas · 24/03/2025 17:04

Being unhappy at work is ok, and it sounds like she has good reason. Underperforming or behaving inappropriately at work isn’t. You need to separate out what’s about performance/behaviour from her happiness at work.

If she feels there’s a skills gap can you provide training? If it’s that she doesn’t like the job she needs to decide to stay or go, and she needs supported to perform in the meantime.

Given she’s just back from maternity leave it may be worth seeing how she is and getting your own sense of what she needs. Life will have changed for her and what she needs from her job now may be different.

I’d be very wary of starting a PiP with someone just back from maternity leave, let her get her feet under the desk first. I’d also be wary that your manager is making bullets for you to fire. She’s managed her for years and hasn’t changed things so you can’t be expected to fix it within such a short time.

Make your own assessment based on where she is now.

The thing is .... She thinks she doesn't need any further training. Now myself having way more experience than her in what she says she has experience, I would say she really isn't up to the level she says she is (senior individual contributor).

I did tell her that she needed to act and propose things within the scope of the role she wants/says she deserves.

She thinks our roles are too admin heavy (which are in comparison to the rest of the indusy) but it is what it is.

I want to help her, but she has to understand we can't come up with new roles just to make her happy. We just don't have the need nor the £££.

OP posts:
TeenLifeMum · 24/03/2025 17:11

Has she got clear objectives?

Springee · 24/03/2025 17:12

Hmm how about trying to ask her what changes to her role would help her enjoy it more. She's obviously stayed for some reason, so maybe that loyalty deserves something back from the workplace

WeeOrcadian · 24/03/2025 17:13

I suspect you'll find yourself in hot water, given that she's just (when?) recently returned from mat leave

Surely if she's just come back, she hasn't had enough time 'get back into the swing of things'

Form your own opinion before jumping in feet first, especially when you're new to this role and setup

holidayblues25 · 24/03/2025 17:14

Springee · 24/03/2025 17:12

Hmm how about trying to ask her what changes to her role would help her enjoy it more. She's obviously stayed for some reason, so maybe that loyalty deserves something back from the workplace

Personally I think she's stayed because the role isn't a FT job but pays FT (if you're organised).

The things she wants to change are out of the scope of her role.

What she wants is textbook definition of the role that was made redundant.

OP posts:
Jellycatspyjamas · 24/03/2025 17:16

The thing is .... She thinks she doesn't need any further training. Now myself having way more experience than her in what she says she has experience, I would say she really isn't up to the level she says she is (senior individual contributor).

The level she says she is, or the role she was square pegged into when her job changed? It’s a really common mistake for new managers to try and fix long standing issues that have been allowed to fester. The problem is she’s been allowed to continue in her job for years without substantive action, you run the risk of a harassment complaint if you’re on top of her constantly, especially when she’s just back from maternity leave.

FOJN · 24/03/2025 17:18

You're focussing on the wrong part of the problem.

The job she was hired for was made redundant. Clearly she had a choice between accepting redundancy or a new job role. She seems to have accepted the new job role but doesn't like it. She has had several years to find another job but instead she has stayed, made her dissatisfaction known and is under performing.

You could do an appraisal with her, see if there is anyway to improve her job satisfaction and also set expectations for performance and if she does not improve then you will have to implement a PIP.

You have a responsibility to treat employees fairly and in line with the law but you are not responsible for creating a job role she loves just because she's underperforming.

wherearemypastnames · 24/03/2025 17:18

Her work is subpar - that’s all you need to focus on . it’s irrelevant that she wants the job to be something different- it is what it is - she either does the work to the required standard or she will be back on a PIP and the pathway to being managed out if she can’t lift her performance with the right support

holidayblues25 · 24/03/2025 17:19

Jellycatspyjamas · 24/03/2025 17:16

The thing is .... She thinks she doesn't need any further training. Now myself having way more experience than her in what she says she has experience, I would say she really isn't up to the level she says she is (senior individual contributor).

The level she says she is, or the role she was square pegged into when her job changed? It’s a really common mistake for new managers to try and fix long standing issues that have been allowed to fester. The problem is she’s been allowed to continue in her job for years without substantive action, you run the risk of a harassment complaint if you’re on top of her constantly, especially when she’s just back from maternity leave.

I'm the most hands off manager.... As long as nobody complains i.e. our clients I'm not going to check her work. We're all adults after all.

I've been involved in these sorts of roles for almost 15 years. She's most certainly a mid level professional (even within her original role).

OP posts:
holidayblues25 · 24/03/2025 17:21

FOJN · 24/03/2025 17:18

You're focussing on the wrong part of the problem.

The job she was hired for was made redundant. Clearly she had a choice between accepting redundancy or a new job role. She seems to have accepted the new job role but doesn't like it. She has had several years to find another job but instead she has stayed, made her dissatisfaction known and is under performing.

You could do an appraisal with her, see if there is anyway to improve her job satisfaction and also set expectations for performance and if she does not improve then you will have to implement a PIP.

You have a responsibility to treat employees fairly and in line with the law but you are not responsible for creating a job role she loves just because she's underperforming.

Exactly that's how I feel. I just find it a bit bizarre that somebody would stay for so long knowing that the role she dreams of will never materialise.

OP posts:
SometimesCalmPerson · 24/03/2025 17:26

She’s stayed because she knew she’d want the maternity leave. She may continue to stay just for the maternity leave, especially if she gets paid a full time wage without having to work full time.

Shes not invested, she’s not good at her job, she whines about her job, so yes, you definitely need to find a way to get rid of her.

SundayFundayz · 24/03/2025 17:26

OP are you honestly going to take advice from a chat forum with no idea what qualifications people have?
Please speak to your HR team and ask them about their processes and get some support from them with this.

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