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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Employee hasn't liked her role for the past 4 years

127 replies

holidayblues25 · 24/03/2025 16:46

I started in my new role as manager 6 months ago and she just came back from ML.

My manager (who used to manage her) just told me she hasn't been happy for many, many years, but that she has stayed even though it's very apparent she isn't happy.

We're thinking of starting to involve HR as her quality of work is subpar (she's already been on a PIP before).

I'm new to this role so don't really know how to proceed. When it happened to me, my then manager told me she's help me "leave" (although my circumstances were slightly different).

So AIBU to think we need to build a case? Being unhappy is obviously not a reason for dismissal. Or somebody has to be brutally honest with her, but that might backfire.

OP posts:
Lemanandliq · 25/03/2025 19:17

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Lemanandliq · 25/03/2025 19:18

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holidayblues25 · 25/03/2025 19:20

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To me they're separate things, she could still be very much capable of doing the job (it's not rocket science) but she isn't motivated because she doesn't like the role.

I think que quality is a reflection of her insatisfaction.

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Lemanandliq · 25/03/2025 19:30

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holidayblues25 · 25/03/2025 19:39

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Bad time management / low productivity.

Not understanding the needs of our industry

Not having some sort of technical (and commercial) accumen.

Her mistakes are more down to attention to detail. The lack of responsiveness is more worrying than anything else (which was the client complaint).

OP posts:
HazelBiscuit · 25/03/2025 19:40

Would a goals based approach work?
What are your five year plans?
How can we help you get there?
if that role isn’t going to be available at this company, what support do you need to move back to that role? What would that look like etc?
The answer to the latter questions doesn’t mean your company has to provide the role. It’s about helping her get the one she wants (and see that she might need to make some moves to get there).

Poutysorry · 26/03/2025 06:27

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Poutysorry · 26/03/2025 06:28

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holidayblues25 · 26/03/2025 06:34

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The client complaints are old in the sense that they're from before she left.

To me it makes sense, she's never been happy thus her work has never been stellar.

She'll never be happy (because we can't offer what she wants) so potentially it will never improve.

I would rather she concludes that herself than a very stressful PIP.

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holidayblues25 · 26/03/2025 06:35

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Without the quote that's taken out of context. She's never demonstrated she's incapable of the above (at least to me).

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Poutysorry · 26/03/2025 06:44

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Poutysorry · 26/03/2025 06:44

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holidayblues25 · 26/03/2025 06:46

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The points you point out. Which she hasn't demonstrated she's incapable of. I simply have not seen evidence either way.

The.clientn complaint needs to be taken out of the equation as it was some time ago.

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Mymanyellow · 26/03/2025 07:27

Sounds like she’s not performing well because she’s still sulking about being made redundant 4 years ago?
I mean on one hand I do t blame her, she’s been allowed to coast, so that’s what she’s doing.
She’s not going to leave under her own steam sounds like she’s expecting you to magic up her old job.
It’s interesting that nothing has been done up until now and you’re expected to deal with her.

Poutysorry · 26/03/2025 07:55

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Poutysorry · 26/03/2025 07:57

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Poutysorry · 26/03/2025 07:59

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Jellycatspyjamas · 26/03/2025 10:40

The points you point out. Which she hasn't demonstrated she's incapable of. I simply have not seen evidence either way.

Surely that’s your starting point, finding current evidence of under performance that you can then bring to her. There’s nothing worse than a manger saying there are problems with your performance when they can’t then produce current examples.

I think you’re relying too much on your managers view of her, which may be informed by things other than her actual performance. Your manager chose not to address these issue that now seem urgent - I’d be questioning why that is.

At best your manager was too much of a coward to deal with it directly, at worse she setting you up to be the bad guy.

Jellycatspyjamas · 26/03/2025 10:43

Maybe, but the reality is that we're also a bloated team, and the company is not doing as well as before.

If the company need to reduce head count the ethical thing to do is to go through a redundancy process with clear selection criteria and relevant redundancy payment. It’s utterly unethical to manage someone out the door because the team is bloated.

holidayblues25 · 26/03/2025 10:46

Jellycatspyjamas · 26/03/2025 10:43

Maybe, but the reality is that we're also a bloated team, and the company is not doing as well as before.

If the company need to reduce head count the ethical thing to do is to go through a redundancy process with clear selection criteria and relevant redundancy payment. It’s utterly unethical to manage someone out the door because the team is bloated.

I think just adds to my suprise about her attitude.

She clearly is not on the same level as her peers (that she says is more experienced/senior) that is a fact. I think her peers go above expectations and it's obvious, particularly one of them.

Whereas she just sits and sulks that the job isn't what she wants, because she's "on a different level than anybody else".

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Poutysorry · 26/03/2025 11:06

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RidingMyBike · 26/03/2025 14:47

There are employees who will keep on being negative about the job and not do anything themselves to improve the situation, ie go and find a job they like better somewhere else.

Often it's because they have some benefits to working there that they'd risk losing otherwise. In this case access to a maternity package. Or it could be hybrid or flexible working. Or one of those employers where you get more annual leave the longer you've worked there. Don't forget too that it's risky moving employers. You have far fewer rights in the first couple of years, such as to redundancy payments. You don't know what your new manager or team would be like.

Plus it takes effort to job hunt and be successful applying somewhere else. Maybe she can't be bothered as she's been able to coast in this job?

And sometimes employees cannot see beyond their own roles and what they want. She wants a particular role and so why shouldn't this employer provide it? Rather than looking at the bigger picture and trying to understand why this employer is unlikely to offer this type/level of role.

RawBloomers · 26/03/2025 15:44

holidayblues25 · 26/03/2025 10:46

I think just adds to my suprise about her attitude.

She clearly is not on the same level as her peers (that she says is more experienced/senior) that is a fact. I think her peers go above expectations and it's obvious, particularly one of them.

Whereas she just sits and sulks that the job isn't what she wants, because she's "on a different level than anybody else".

You need to be honest about her performance and options at your company without being mean about it.

Don’t indulge her idea (that you seem to imply) that she deserves more from the company if she isn’t producing the work, but equally let her know that opportunity is there if she can put her superior experience etc. to work in a way that shows in her performance.

HazelBiscuits goal based suggestion is a good way to try what is basically the approach you experienced when you were in a similar position. You can do that in conjunction with other approaches aimed at managing her expectations and performance.

Isthiswhatmenthink · 26/03/2025 16:26

Has @Poutysorry been banned yet? They’ve been twatting about all over threads all day.

NowYouSee · 26/03/2025 17:15

OP you really should not attempt to PIP someone based off pre mat leave work, a tremendously bad idea and leaving you wide open to maternity discrimination claim.

Instead set out very clearly the expectations of the role going forward at her level. What that means in terms of quality, volume, outcomes - whatever is relevant to the role. Where relevant give her a period of time to adjust back eg if in a fast moving industry you can’t expect her to be 100% up to speed on today’s current practice and trends day 1 if it has changed whilst out.

Monitor this regularly and document it, raise with her promptly when an issue and make clear what your expectations were and what needs to be different. by all means speak to HR first to make sure you capture what you need should this require a PIP in due course.

Depending on your organisation, general approach and management risk appetite if you are overstaffed and she hates her job you could discuss with management and then HR whether a possibility to mutually agree an exit with her to allow her to leave with some cash and reduce ongoing costs. Not as an opening salvo but can in some cases be a good outcome for everyone.