Being laughed at on the School Run

[ChoccyBiscuits123]

Okay so I'm going to start by saying I'm not usually bothered by people's behaviour - I'm very much a live and let live person....however...there are two women on the school run that I am just perplexed by.

So for example this morning..I had just dropped my daughter off at school and I'm minding my own business walking home. These two other mums come from around the corner and immediately start laughing directly at me in my face...! They then stifled their giggles and walked past. This is not the first time this has happened.
Once they started singing a Kylie Minogue song at me from the other side of the road laughing and twirling around. All a bit much for me in the morning!!

We're all pretty relaxed dressers on the school run..they wear tracksuits and tie their hair up and I tend to wear leggings and a navy joules coat with miminal make up (mascara and perhaps a red lip if I have the energy) so it's not like I'm going to school in Kylie hot pants or full make up or other crazy clothing.

I'm perplexed as to why they've targeted me as I don't know them at all. It's got to the point where it is upsetting me. Someone laughing in my face or stifling giggles as I walk past is hurtful and it's starting to feel like bullying. Am I being too sensitive? Is my make up or dress sense so awful they cant help but laugh? I am so confused! Esp as they don't seem to do it to anyone else.

I want to ignore it and just put it down to them being muppets but I am struggling now.

I can't confront them as they will probably just see it as hilarious and as they've never actually said anything directly to me they could accuse me of being paranoid.

Any help or advice much appreciated. No nasty comment please.

That’s absolutely awful OP - I would be so upset if this happened to me, and I had DCs at an infamously bitchy school, albeit a very middle-class one.

Do you have any mum friends at the school you can talk to about this? Have you been able to observe them from afar - do you know what year their DCs are in, which mums they hang around with?

I agree with a PP that you need the hind of a rhino to get through the junior school years. As it got to the last couple of years for my second child, I could literally feel the stress evaporating away…

Talking about their clothing vs her Joules coat. Not sure how any of it is relevant

In fact, I'd be inclined to dress up really smart and strut past them like they're peasants..😂

They sound like a couple of twats and personally I would mutter as such as I passed them.

hi @ChoccyBiscuits123 i would try to catch one of them separately and just start chatting and smiling kindly and they will likely soon warm up and realise they’ve been a bit mean

Assuming you have no history of paranoia and these women are really laughing and dancing at you when you barely know them
all you can do is ignore

please also ignore any advice that tells you to say or do something as that will make you look batshit crazy especially if their behaviour turns out not aimed at you , to have the upper hand morally / emotionally you need to be above reproach and to have done nothing at all

can you ask another mum for their opinion on the matter ? Or to walk with you to experience the laughing and give an opinion

I'm a bit jealous I have never felt that gleeful on drop off ! Mostly just harassed and rushed

Middle finger goes up, the other mams laugh at my hippy gear but they all look the same so 🤷🏽‍♀️

They sound awful OP. I have no advice other than ignore them, which does seem a bit inadequate as no one should have to put up with that.

Context is everything here.. I’m envisioning 2 unwashed slobs in their tracksuits who have seen this beautiful athletic mum who looks like she’s just left the salon despite her low effort leggings look and are jealous to the point that they mock you.

She was just trying to set the scene and pre-empting questions I reckon.

Agree - ugh, I always think those types of mothers peaked in high school and are desperately trying to relive their glory days.
I felt sorry for them to be honest.

Yes I enjoy doing this when I get the chance.

impatient driver behind me was beeping because I stuck to the speed limit, as he overtook he drove alongside and the woman passenger wound down the window and shouted “dozy cow fuck off”.
I gave her a big smile and said “Hi great to see you again! hope things have worked out for you”.

Don’t change what you are doing OP. Just remain polite and civil and let them work on their insecurities. You are better than trying to think of any retaliatory silliness.

I agree with @pimplebum above

Doing something a bit crazy to throw them off, might feel proactive but it will only add another installment to the concocted daily soap drama they are building and they will be looking forward to see what they can provoke you to next.

Show them they will never get any headspace.

You might not think you are a Kylie look-alike but maybe from a distance to a couple of women who want it to be so, you could be squeezed into that role.
Kylie is rather lovely, so if it's that, I guess it could be worse.

Some grown women seem to regress when the playground becomes a backdrop to their lives again.

They are stupid. People who laugh at nothing really irritate me and I am not generally irritated. Next time you see them ask what is so funny. That's what I do.

These women are not kids who might laugh at nothing or out of nervousness. They are ill mannered and ridiculous.

I am annoyed on your behalf.

Next time they sing a KM song at you look them both hard in the eyes and say "do you like KM too?" Keep staring until they cringe with the uncomfort..... kill people with kindness I do! OR give them a KM LP as you know they're such big fans!

I have to say I never saw any of this kind of behaviour at school pick up or drop off. The worst I've experienced is some parents who would moan endlessly about very minor things at a pretty good school.

I doubt anyone was going to ask about their hairstyles

I think smile naturally at them, say hello, then walk past at your usual pace.

I agree lean into it… have fun with it … in the end they are being a high school bully and are emotionally stunted so I’d have fun with it … some big 80s hair … hoop earrings chew some gum next month death rocker … or just ignore they will find a new target soon or toon on each other . They always do

That's not what she said, was it.

She was saying that these women are likely jealous of the op's looks, which sounds feasible going off their behaviour.

I have to say I would need a lot of evidence to be sure it's about you. Why would they do this? I've been at countless school drop offs over the years and never seen open bitciness I think it's often peoples own insecurities manifesting when they think people are doing it.

not being unkind, just worth considering if you are being over sensitive.

Maybe they're laughing because only one of your lips is red.

I wonder if you come across as a bit snobby and aloof OP with your mention of wearing make-up and a Joules coat compared to tracksuits (?) just to do the school run?

My sister is a bit like this and was really annoyed with me when I called to her that she’d left her Anorak behind and she had to hiss the brand name and price tag to me as if it was something really impressive. I don’t waste money on brand names if I can buy similar cheaper in the supermarket, so it still went right over my head. 😂

Either way, just ignore them. Sticks and stones and all that jazz. 🤷🏻‍♀️