If you’d booked a babysitter

[FanofLeaves]

And they’d completed a 7 hour shift for you, entertaining and then putting your small children to bed, and then staying up until you get in at 1am, how soon would you be paying them?

I’m a nanny but I do a bit of babysitting work on the odd weekend for extra cash. Desperately in need of the extra cash at the moment and my bank account is looking pretty bare so am currently getting pissed off looking at my bank account and willing a payment of over £100 (including the uber home I had to get due to public transport having stopped, I don’t drive) to appear.

I sent a text with the amount owed and my bank details, attaching the taxi receipt, at 9:30am yesterday morning.

I think I’m going to either have to ask for some payment to be made in advance, or charging a late fee but this sounds a bit arsey snd I’m worried it might put people off. Then again, if you are say in a restaurant or have had your haircut you pay promptly after receiving that service, you don’t pay it at some point over the next few days!

i’ll send a nudge later this morning but it annoys me that I have to do it.

So I guess my question is, say you’d booked a babysitter, how promptly do you pay them? And would you expect to be charged a late fee for taking 24+ to pay? I get it, we have busy lives, I’m a mum myself, but it just feels like a piss take. I think I’ve had one babysitting gig this year where the money has hit my account before I’m even home, all the others take up to 3 days to make payment.

Fab! Sounds like you've got a system that works well for you.

Other families do other things and that works for them.

Absolutely, we need to as insurance for the houses where nothing is offered and the cupboards are bare 🤣

horses for courses I suppose. I’d at least have a loaf of bread in for toast or a bag of crisps or something then the babysitter can take or leave if they’ve brought their own food. It does really vary. I’ve had families that have ordered me Deliveroo (I actually don’t love this as I don’t like waiting on a delivery at someone’s house) and leave a fridge full that I can help myself to. I’ve had families that clearly don’t have food that people can snack on so I leave it. But I think it is nice to be hospitable towards someone caring for your children in your home.

We have never used a babysitter for various reasons, but I used to babysit as a teenager. It seems to me that babysitting has slipped into this weird in-between world where it’s not the teenager from next door getting paid £10 to sit and watch TV anymore, so you’re paying a lot more for professional childcare but the childcarer is still expecting the ‘extras’ that parents used to give the teenager (a taxi/lift home; drinks and pizza; pay-on-the-day). In my view you have to decide: are you a professional who can command a professional rate for your work? If so, behave like every other professional, i.e. pay for your own transport (factor it into your rates), bring your food and drinks with you and have a standard payment period (most invoices do not require immediate payment - professionals must manage their cash flow appropriately). You’re not a teenage babysitter and so shouldn’t expect to be treated as one.

When our nanny 'babysits' she issues an invoice which includes the time period she expects payment and late payment fees. This makes it very transparent. We always pay well within 48hrs anyway out of courtesy though as she is good and we want to keep her. It's so easy to do these days with banking app on your phone. Always have a conversation with parents about when and how for payment to avoid this (I mean you shouldn't have to, but unfortunately people will always take the p*ss).

I don’t. I would happily pay for a sitters cab. I would also pay them on the night.

Babysitters for late nights out are mostly a luxury, if you can’t afford one, stay in.

Well, I wouldn’t have got home without a taxi. Unless I walked the 4 miles I guess at 1am. My husband can’t pick me up because he’s at home with my son, not that I’d expect someone to drive out and get me at 1am regardless! I’m happy to take public transport up to 11pm though which is more than a lot of babysitters I know who won’t do it after dark!

But anyway, no one has ever had a problem paying for it, it’s their choice to be out that late, and they think nothing of ordering themselves a taxi home at the end of that.

Then you should have enough cash on you to pay the babysitter in cash before she leaves. You are archaic banking system is not her problem.

Absolutely - this is my take.

I choose to pay a professional professional rates, they need to figure out the rest.

I really don't have the time or enthusiasm to check what food they like, order it in especially, or factor in a variable price for a taxi home. I just want to pay a sensible rate and have them sort it out because I pay a professional not a teen.

I pay immediately.

you need to make your expectations clear in advance going forward

Well surely you got bread/pasta/cheese/fruit whatever at home. So you can just basically tell the sitter to help herself. I would atleast have a pizza in the freezer if she wanted and some nibbles/chocolate to propose. It's basic hospitality to offer something to eat and drink to your sitter.

Have you babysat for this family before? Were they aware of the cost in advance? Not that it matters. They should have paid you on the night.

This.

Once before, they booked me for this particular night three months ago so it won’t have come as a surprise that they’d need to think about payment!

If I got home at midnight after a nice dinner and bit of wine I wouldn’t be faffing about with banking. I’d do it the next day though.

I have both the NatWest and Halifax banking apps and you can do this on both of them.

They both give the option to send a link or produce a QR code that can be scanned there and then.

The link would be better though in your case.

As to your original question, I'd pay the minute I either got home, or when you got home (if I was waiting for taxi info), or the next morning if I'd fallen asleep by the time you got home!

Of course they order themselves a taxi home because that's them paying for themselves. You're offering a service, it's a business. If you had a plumber or a decorator or gardener in your home, would you make dinner for them and pay for their taxi home?

To begin with I was quite sympathetic to your quandary about how/when to chase money but you're increasingly coming across as entitled. Expecting them to get you a taxi because 'they think nothing of getting a taxi home themselves' is an appalling and very odd attitude.

You need to learn a bit if business sense!

Would you offer the same to your gardener/plumber/decorator?

Past babysitter stage now but I would always pay on the night in either cash or transfer. I’d always order them an uber from my account too or put them in the black cab I’ve just stumbled out of.

I think when you’re arranging the babysitting, before the actual night, you should just say you’ll need paying on the night please. You shouldn’t have to, but probably easier to be clear at the beginning than at the end of the night when everyone’s a little worse for wear.

we pay in cash. It’s not about what people offer, it’s what the babysitter asks for. Just be upfront about it. ‘It will be cash on the night, is that ok?’ And then when you arrive say, ‘just a reminder that I only take cash in case you need to stop at a bank machine on the way home’

They can pop out for lunch though 🤣

I fully agree and it’s a job. I’m paying for a job- I don’t mind them helping themselves to
anything but I wouldn’t put anything out or buy anythin specifically . But if my family babysit for free I’d leave food out and wine .

Omg! That’s insane. We pay our babysitter on the night before she leaves - she checks her bank account to check the payment has gone through as we usually transfer it. I never expected anything different tbh. It takes minutes to log into online banking and send money. Her mum or dad usually picks her up as she doesn’t drive, but if she ever can’t get a lift home we order her an uber and pay for it from our account so she was never out of pocket.

She did state these terms before we used her for the first time though - hourly rate, payment on the night before she leaves, payment for transport home if she can’t get a lift. Could you do this OP but also state that non-payment will incur late fees of X for every day they aren’t paid? Send a text out to all your regular users about the updated terms - we got one from our usual sitter in January when she put her hourly rate up and she took the opportunity to reinforce her terms of payments etc. No issues from us as we know where we stand.

We also ask her what she wants food wise before she comes and get it in for her so that’s all sorted, usually a pizza or pasta or something if she does an evening and needs tea. We also say she’s welcome to bring and cook her own stuff, but we’re happy to get stuff in her for too. We have no family nearby to ask and it’s so hard to find people you trust enough to watch your children, and we’re just grateful we have her as DH and I’d rarely get date nights (not that we do it regularly!). We don’t want to p*ss her off so she won’t come again! (She’s DS old key worker from his old nursery and we still use her even though he’s now at a different preschool).

They can but they usually don't, they bring their own. Either way, would you not think it was odd if your decorator expected you to feed them and fund their transport home?

If they aren't paying you until 3 days later - then those particular families, you let them know a deposit is required of £60 going forward

Send them all a text message after you have been paid for Saturday night

Stipulate that if you have not had a deposit of £60 for the date required when booking you will no longer be able to babysit. Unfortunately due to a situation that arose moving forward a deposit will be require from anyone wanting you to work with them and their children. Hopefully everyone will understand.

You don't have to let anyone know the situation arising is having an overdraft etc - but you've done the work and want paying promptly

I babysit for 3 families and one pays on the night before I leave, the other two always pay the following morning.

I had one who didn't pay for 3 or 4 days, and I am never available to babysit on the nights she requests... she stopped asking

Know your worth

Would you offer the same to your gardener/plumber/decorator?

my mum used to feed all of them... the plumber quoted for the job and it last 4 weeks