AIBU to believe a Solicitor acting for the other party can't make false accusations against me?

[Apricottoast]

I've been going through Tribunal proceedings for Child maintenance with my ex. He has a Solicitor but I can't afford one.
At the last hearing on Friday, his Solicitor made all sorts of derogatory accusations about me which aren't true, and twisted things out of context.
She's clearly going by what my ex has told her to say, but I was wondering if a Solicitor shouldn't be allowed to make accusations which make the opposing party look bad, unless they know them to be true, even if it's in the Court room?
Don't they have a code of conduct to follow?

A solicitor acting for she opposition party is supposed to make you look bad and disparage you. You need nerves of steel and a good support network.

No, they aren't there to interrogate the truth of what their client tells them. It's in court where you can prove his claims false.

They’re acting on instructions and the representations made by their client to them, presenting their clients case. Court is supposed to be the venue to test the evidence. Solicitors can’t be expected to intuitively know what’s factual and what’s not.

Solicitor acts on good faith, they take what their client tells them as the truth.

As an example, he could say you were drinking a bottle of vodka a week in the morning while driving the children to school. You can say you were drinking water. Witnesses saw you drink from a water bottle. You can't prove it wasn't vodka when he has said he saw you put vodka in the bottle. Proving a negative is very challenging.

Their job is to win in their clients favour, not yours.

Actually it's the opposite of what you think. They are there to argue whatever their clients want them to unless they know for certain that it's a lie.
The judge will be well aware of the sorry of tactics, stay calm and try to remain dignified and remember in a cms claim tribunal the judges have hurd and seen it all before and the fact that your ex can pay for a solicitor (whilst claiming poverty) and you're self representing says everything about the sort of man he is.
Also when your ex only has mud slinging on his side whilst you have actual evidence means that they have no defence.
My ex and his solicitor made all sorts of nasty allegations about me to the judge, the judge still ordered a lean on his house so that when he sells it I get my £s back cms he owed (he had fiddled his earnings for over a decade until the tax man caught him🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣).

My ex's solicitor is making all kinds of ridiculous statements about me. I assume they are all coming from my ex, who is behaving like a complete twat. However, I have gone through each one of them with my own solicitor and she's countered them all.

Get a solicitor. If you are on a low income, is there no financial support available in the UK? (We are abroad and I could apply for support but I'll be back at work soon -currently on maternity leave - and would earn above the threshold.)

They do have a code of conduct and a regulator - you could make a complaint but chances are she is legitimately presenting what your ex has said about you. You simply need to counter this in your witness statement and remain steadily child focused - which btw courts prefer.

I wouldn’t say they take it as truth they just present it as such.

I get they're there to argue for their client, but I still thought they're supposed to act with at least some integrity to the other party . Obviously not!
I'm glad it worked out for you in the end and you got the better of your ex!

They’re acting on behalf of their client. Its horrendous and I sympathise with you - I’ve been cross examined by a barrister as part of a CSA trial (I was the victim) and it’s really upsetting.

But they’re only doing their job.

I'm not on the best income, but still wouldn't qualify for any help, besides, that was the last hearing I think, even though I've only had two, and I'm assuming I'll get a decision soon.
I did try to get my point across, but his solicitor had more opportunity to put my ex's side across than I did.

I've got to go now but will be back later, thanks

I’m a solicitor. Your solicitor is obliged to act on their client’s instructions. They also have a duty not to mislead the tribunal, but it’s only misleading if they advance a point they KNOW to be untrue. They do not have to KNOW their client’s instructions are true, only that the client says they are true. If the client says “I want you to say that Apricottoast attacked me, even though that didn’t happen”, they couldn’t say that. If he told them to say you attacked him, and he maintained that that did happen, they would have to act on his instructions.

I hope that helps.

My ex quickly worked out he could make up any old shit and no one stopped him. Got him nowhere. His tactics were obvious.

but it resulted in a whole world of stress and pain for me along the way, worrying the court would believe him (where they just want you both to act like adults, stop fighting and do the right thing by your child)

A solicitor will write what your ex tells them, since he’s paying them. My solicitor used to cringe at some of the utter garbage that my ex said.
You need nerves of steel or representation.
Write a response to all of his accusations with evidence to support you if possible.
It's often men following ‘the script’ and judges see straight through it. My ex swore at the judge and stormed out once.

They can basically say what they like. My ex's solicitor (and barrister) told some absolute whoppers..

Luckily I had all the paperwork to refute them (when they mattered - I also focussed my energy), and stick to the core of the matter (I'd put a lot of thought into what I wanted, and what was reasonable, and I got it)

As its a tribunal hearing the vast majority of issues raised about your behaviour etc will be irrelevant.

In cases involving my ex if needed I was able to state if needed

'In the affidavit signed on..... (page 1) she stated that she had no intention to remarry or cohabit, however in the document submitted in connection with the hearing at ..... (page 2) she states that she and her partner decided to move in together 3 days later.

So the only allegation I needed to make about her behaviour - she didnt tell the truth was documented in her own hand, and I only raised it if necessary.

I certainly think from experience that the Tribunal will be decidedly unimpressed and it will do your ex no favours.

Most solicitors are not much good at Social Security & Child Maintenance law anyway, I would suggest

1. Citizens Advice and
2. Take somebody - friend, family etc the hearing to 'hold your hand'

https://www.sra.org.uk/solicitors/standards-regulations/code-conduct-solicitors/

1. You only make assertions or put forward statements, representations or submissions to the court or others which are properly arguable.

So I suggest look at what has been submitted and compare it with this paragraph

Why are you going through a tribunal? I have never heard of that before. The child maintenance service deal with maintenance claims

A solicitor must represent their client’s interests zealously and put forward their perspective. They can’t put forward things they know to be false to a court but it’s rare that a solicitor would know what a client says is untrue. What they think about their client or their personal opinion of them is irrelevant.

saying things you don’t agree with is their job unfortunately

I had a quick search because I was curious and from what I can see, a tribunal usually takes place when a parent has not paid the correct child maintenance as decided by the CMS. Is this the case?

You can go through the appeals process to a Tribunal if you believe that the paying parent isn't paying what they should, and earning more than they're declaring.

Yes that's right, my ex is earning far more than he's declaring.

I appreciate all the replies so far, I've got to go into work now but will pop back later,

Poor you. You are being brave going through a tribunal to hold him to account. Yes a solicitor will use what they can to disparage you. However, on a good note, a tribunal judge is likely to be kinder to you as you are not represented. So, you need to: go heavy on the emotional toll. Stress you cant afford anything and he can so you question how that is as he isnt paying you much. Keep repeating that what they are saying is not only true, it is irrelevant as all you want is to help from the tribunal that he is paying what he should. Keep asking the tribunal judge if that is relevant. Be upset. (it will be upsetting). I went through all this myself so feel free to PM me,