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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Are you happy to spend a day doing nothing?

175 replies

ForZanyAquaViewer · 22/03/2025 14:54

Just that, really. I have a fairly busy life, but I really relish a bit of ‘nothing’ time. Not leaving the house on a Sunday, reading my book and eating a takeaway is really quite heavenly.

I was discussing this with a friend and she was very much of the opinion that she’d feel horrible and guilty if she ‘wasted’ a whole day. The general feeling being that she needed to productive, get out and about, and do stuff. Every day.

I found this really interesting. There’s lots of different kinds of people, and that’s obviously fine. However, in this respect, are you a ‘could never waste a day’ person? Or a ‘happy to lounge’ person? (If you’re a person who would be happy to lounge only after doing stuff, then I’d consider you a ‘could never waste a whole day’ person).

YANBU: happy to lounge
YABU: could never ‘waste’ a whole day

OP posts:
varden · 22/03/2025 15:12

Another one of those with no guilt about indolence.

I feel there is a lot of pressure to be active, productive and "doing stuff" all day every day. I don't subscribe to that at all, but still get the necessary things done.

There is a balance. A slow, easy day with nowhere to go (can stay in pjs/loose clothing and skip the morning shower oops) is just so so nice.

TheChosenTwo · 22/03/2025 15:12

I have done nothing for the past 2 weeks but lie down watch telly and sleep because I’ve been knocked for my feet by a virus.
Other than that though I don’t enjoy just doing ‘nothing’ for hours on end.
I need to get outside for a bit, even just for an hour, otherwise I feel a bit groggy/grotty.
I do love relaxing with my book or watching some tv but it’s never the sole purpose of my day.
So I don’t think it’s a case of Yabu/Yanbu,
more personal preference.

Skipthisbit · 22/03/2025 15:12

My husband is your friend and I am you!

I fund it fascinating that he genuinely can’t just chill. He just can’t. He’s very routine driven so had a set routine for everything - washing, ironing, cooking, shopping, gardening and house stuff etc seems to get such joy from getting it all done. I let him get on with it tbh. And he’s quite happy. He finds it motivating and de-stresses him from work apparently.

I love do nothing days. I can
spends days dozing, reading a bit, having a snack and repeat and still sleep well at night. He can’t.
Plu la difference 😊

Pickingmyselfup · 22/03/2025 15:15

I love a do nothing day as long as everything is done. Doesn't happen very often but I have so nothing chunks of time during an afternoon or an evening which is always necessary.

FannyBawz · 22/03/2025 15:15

Ive just had an hour long nap. Yes, I was at the gym all morning but nonetheless the joy of feeling relaxed and rested is exactly what weekends are for!

stayathomer · 22/03/2025 15:18

I generally work at least one weekend day so doing nothing one day means something not done for school week/ work week/ house etc. love the sound of it but it just wouldn’t work here

Cucy · 22/03/2025 15:19

I absolutely love a nothing day but I do tend to feel guilty, which is ridiculous because I work hard and should spend my free time however I want but I think feeling guilty is just part of being a mum.

I definitely need a nothing day though and so I try and do it without the guilt.

faerietales · 22/03/2025 15:20

My weekends are pretty much always spent doing nothing and it’s absolutely amazing!

Today I had a lie-in, had an “everything shower”, had a coffee in the sunshine, watched some TV, messed about on here and now I’m back out with the dog and a cat enjoying the warmth. Heaven!

Bakedpotatoes · 22/03/2025 15:22

I used to feel like this because I grew up with 'you have to get dressed and do something with a day.' but being busy for busy sake is pointless. I am busy during the week and on Saturdays with various clubs for the children that doing nothing but relaxing, watching TV is a god send. I don't feel guilty anymore but see it as filling my own cup.

BarneyRonson · 22/03/2025 15:22

Essential to my good humour to have time to decompress. Soak in the bath and lie around in a dressing gown drinking tea, with the cat.

it’s my IT equivalent of “turn it off and turn it on again”. Clear cache!

ManyATrueWord · 22/03/2025 15:27

Anything that brings me joy is productive. It produces joy.

DancingLions · 22/03/2025 15:29

I like to "potter". I might do a chore or two, read a while, work on my craft hobbies, spend a bit of time in the garden. The day just flies by.

My sister is like your friend, always has to be out and about. I find it utterly exhausting and not very enjoyable a lot of the time. I can't stand being out just for the sake of it. That feels far more a waste of my time than a day spent at home doing what I enjoy.

LazyArsedMagician · 22/03/2025 15:31

Listen, some joyless bastard decided at some point that adult humans should toil for 5 or 6 days of the week and only relax on one day. I get two days off, and I'm absolutely spending as much of that doing fuck all. I deserve leisure time too!

Last week I was up early to take a kid somewhere and then fell asleep on the couch for a FIVE HOUR nap. Now that was annoying, I missed out on a lot of loafing in front of the tv.

Gogogo12345 · 22/03/2025 15:34

ladymammalade · 22/03/2025 15:10

I’m with your friend. I find it very difficult to loaf about doing nothing and I get cabin fever if I don’t get out for some fresh air.

Same here

Cattery · 22/03/2025 15:35

A day enjoyed is never wasted. Doing nothing is bliss

SallyWD · 22/03/2025 15:36

I'd be delighted to have a day doing nothing. Never happens though because I always have a backlog of stuff to do. If I could have one day just resting, I'd be sooo happy.

LazyArsedMagician · 22/03/2025 15:37

Gogogo12345 · 22/03/2025 15:34

Same here

But you can "get out for some fresh air" without doing something? Going for a leisurely walk or even a brisk walk is different to going for a walk and popping into Asda or whatever.

Hadalifeonce · 22/03/2025 15:39

I used to feel really guilty if I wasn't doing something most of the time.
Now, if I want to spend hours reading a book, or binge watching a series or film, I will.
DH says if I am reading or watching, I am not doing nothing.

Gogogo12345 · 22/03/2025 15:41

LazyArsedMagician · 22/03/2025 15:37

But you can "get out for some fresh air" without doing something? Going for a leisurely walk or even a brisk walk is different to going for a walk and popping into Asda or whatever.

Well going for a walk is obviously doing something isn't it,?

mumofoneAlonebutokay · 22/03/2025 15:46

😭😭 I'd never regret wasting a day, sorry

A day spent in front of the tv, playing around with self care stuff and eating 🤭🤭

Tortielady · 22/03/2025 15:47

I'm convinced that when I'm on my death-bed, I will not regret the time I spent pottering about, listening to music, eating cheese and crackers and most of all, reading. I'll see it as time well-spent, not wasted. But we are all different and what suits some of us is frustrating and miserable for others.

LazyArsedMagician · 22/03/2025 15:49

Gogogo12345 · 22/03/2025 15:41

Well going for a walk is obviously doing something isn't it,?

Yes? Did you not read the second sentence of my post? Having a walk as a leisure activity I would consider the same as reading a book as a leisure activity. Going for a walk and tagging in a trip to get some shopping I would not.

spudl3t · 22/03/2025 15:51

Would love to but always feel guilty!!!!!!!!

irishbloodenglishparts · 22/03/2025 15:51

I love having a day with nothing to do and nothing planned. Sometimes I do end up going out or doing something in the end but having nothing planned is the dream!

TimeForABreak4 · 22/03/2025 15:56

I'm having a day of doing nothing today and it's been so needed after a shit, very busy start to the year. Had father in laws funeral yesterday so we are happily shutting the world out today and recharging.

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