Teachers who have watched 'Adolescence'- what are your thoughts?

[Fstt1978]

Had an interesting experience this week after watching this at the weekend

sanctioned 4 boys this week with a demerit each - for pushing and shoving in the corridor- swearing loudly and generally being gobby to me.
All 4 boys parents have written emails to say it's unfair/ I'm picking on them etc etc. As it was 4 of them- none of them can be singled out.
We also have a boy caught on CCTV physically assaulting a much younger student unprovoked - it is categorically an assault- with the victims parents pressing charges. He has been permanently excluded and his parents have instructed a solicitor to contest this.

What is going on with parenting boys? Girls sanctioned rarely have parents like this - this is NOT a goady thread- I am genuinely really interested , and open to discussion about it

I am not a teacher but work in a university, also raising a boy and feel very scared for his future. There is definitely quite a laddish attitude amongst our students.

I think one of the reasons for Andrew Tate's popularity in a weird way is because he reflects some of the established misogynistic views in our society. We taught girls their value is more than just as a mother/sexual object, however, we still see boys/men mainly as people who do and get stuff. MN is full of women who when asked about salaries talk about their husband's money, women still predominantly go part time - so men all around us haven't changed their roles all that much. They help in the house but how many put their careers on hold because of their wife, are the main care givers etc. Boys are being raised within an already misogynistic society, Andrew Tate in a way just gives them back their glory. All of this is very scary.

Sooo much respect for Teachers!I have friends and family members who were teaching and glad to get out TBH. went to a "good" school in the late 70s early 80s ,Lots of boys being disrespectful then! Swearing in class ,pinging girls Bra straps running about with STs stuck to their heads! Everything going on in the back seat of the school bus ! Me and my friend were quiet and found it overwhelming.I think it was a relief to go to work! Teenage boys are a law into themselves.A while ago a lady on here, DD was shown porn by a lad on the school bus.Which is illegal ! Boys need a firm guiding hand. But the Tates are feeding a vile outlook .Havent watched Adolescence but its good this is being discussed at length now

I know an intimidating dad, large, face of aggression even when laughing. His kids when get in trouble at school - his view is teachers can’t control kids should be fired. He storms into the school office and blames school for his son’s behavior.
I’ve told him, education is why kids are at school - not beasts to be “controlled” - staff are afraid of the dad.

I bravely replied when he was complaining about the school being bad - if your mum was the teacher - would you worry about kids hurting her? Dad’s coming in and shouting?

It’s no wonder his child is always in trouble … he learned how to rules are not for him from his dad. Pretty sure that dad is in illegal business as has no apparent job.

(wife has office job with good pay, just letting her kids go his way of no education & likely no legit employment.)

Not goading but do you think parents lack respect for teacher because so many parents and students were let down by teachers during the pandemic.

ive heard from many friends at different schools say how they were let down, no lesson planned, little contact made, lots of teachers were seen to do the bare minimum whilst lots of parents were struggling working front line.

Out of interest, what type of university is it, an RG one, a red brick or ex poly?

Yes you are, and no I don't.

Teachers did their best in completely unchartered waters. If parents didn't already have the entitled mentality that every teacher should be focused entirely on their child then they would never have made those judgements in the first place.

And it's hardly as though everything was hunky dory in 2019.

Adolescence on Netflix - does paint school staff very negatively. They’re telling a fictional story and (I think) they need school to be partly to blame Jamie’s violence. Poor Jamie - all this talent but the school is sooo bad.

Jamies problem 100% his lack of positive & active relationships within his family.

Resent the portrayal of the school and general negative portrayal of women. Really, there is not one competent woman … correct me if I’m wrong (even the Psych is feeble and out of her depth)

@Frowningprovidenceif you google ‘Andrew Tate school toolkit’ it should come up. I think it’s Gloucester LA that have produced it. Can’t link here for some reason.

I actually don't think telling boys there is a problem with them is very helpful at all and it helps fuel the division that is exploited by the manosphere. It isn't that hard to bring up your DC with certain values but it is effort and if parents are like a Dad I saw at a service station, so transfixed with his phone that he didn't even notice his toddler walking off to the shop, then it doesn't take a leap of imagination to wonder why kids turn out as they do, they literally have zero guidance from their parents.

@Goldenbear It's a top London one, and we do have quite a privileged intake. However, they are constantly on social media, very laddish, don't respect authority and from what I hear from my female students, sexual assault is rife. I also get the feeling that they see social media in the same way as blokes used to do banter in the 90s, it's not serious, quite nasty and a bit of a game. They are also all desperate to get ahead, and yet quite fragile so are constantly putting on a front.

I work with this age group, in this kind of role, and see many senior schools. The whole show was pretty much 99% accurate on all accounts based on my (fairly long) experience. I have worked in different cities also, and it’s very similar.

honestly I thought it was so well done.

in terms of schools, it’s hit and miss. I’d say whilst annoying, if the parents are emailing in, then that’s ok, have a discussion, at least the parents are bothered and communicating with school, even if slightly misguided. Bear in mind they will only have had their children’s side of the story, not schools, so maybe chat with them to explain and I’m sure it’ll be fine.

I find there is a lot of butting heads with parents and schools. Partly because most of the info that goes home is often negative (negative points, detentions, no homework) and rarely positive. This was the case at my kids school, until very recently. Since then I have had quite a few positive phone calls to tell me he is doing well, a lovely change, and has improved behaviour for him hugely in school too.

i wouldn’t want to be a teacher, there are lots of
challenges and it’s not an easy job, I couldn’t do it. It’s not the teachers but the school system I think that needs an overhaul. The world has changed but school has not.

So RG university? Goodness, that is alarming as in when I think of my DS and his 6th form friends they are all politically progressive, enjoy music that has similar messages about life. Enjoy culture.

I used to teach and I feel it is quite an accurate representation of the secondary schools I have taught in.

Lots of behavioural issues, very few consequences, boys making comments about girls appearances and bullying them for their looks e.g large/small breasts, making comments about what they would like to do to them etc. When brought to the attention of SLT very little done, no conversations or work to improve their views or tackle their blatant misogyny.

I think most parents don’t see it but it’s seen by teachers.

@Goldenbear But there is a problem with men and boys: academic success is declining rapidly, mental health issues and suicides are rife, men are more likely to be perpetrators of crime. Richard Reeves is not blaming them for it though. He sets out solutions and also argues that men’s success should not be at the expensive of women’s: both need to thrive. Worth a quick read. What he argues against is minimising their issues, which I admit I have been guilty of doing too.

The school systems have lost their human side though, this is the most watched generation, surveillance culture at schools doesn't help i.e behaviour points, reward points, test data, online everything scoring you and telling you what you are!

Naive. Did you see the documentary about the Warwick university boys group chat? Boys from one of the top private schools where I live went to Warwick and had a vile misogynistic pro rape group chat. They got expelled then their parents lawyered up to get them reinstated. Nearly succeeded but the majority female English department threatened strike if the university let them back in.

And this is why school is not a good fit for most boys. They shouldn’t be sat down at a desk all day, pencil in hand, fed only an academic education and told if they don’t pass all their GCSEs they’ll be a failure in life.

I agree boys need a firm guiding hand, preferably by a close male relative or relatives. They need positive adult male role models and lots and lots of physical work and movement all day every day. The environments we place our boys in from a very young go against their natural instincts and development. They should be ‘hunting and gathering’ not learning bloody expanded noun phrases and algebra! (not obviously actual hunting- though that would be good for them- we’ve evolved. But at what cost?)

Yes, I get that he doesn't mean it literally and it's a catchy title to get attention but having discussed some of this with my son who's studying Politics, as a teenage boy (one whose values are the opposite to manosphere ideology) he remarked on the constant negative language around boys. He's lucky he comes from a supportive household and is confident and self assured but if you are not so lucky, what does that tell you about you worth, when boys are referred to in this way. I used to go into schools as part of my job and when you see kids sitting outside an office asleep on a table as being removed from a class, I did wonder what the point of that was. It doesn't work the kids look nearly 16, those kids have no interest in doing endless GCSES, something needs to change so they are actually receiving guidance as when they leave at 16 they are then forgotten and probably face isolation and unemployment.

Oh I'm definitely not, if that's aimed at me. People are deluded if they think private schools aren't inhabited by these kids. The attitudes are from the parents and if the Dad earns all the money and the Mum stays at home paying for treatments and plastic surgery what does that say about the values held.

The trouble is men still haven't acquired another form of success other than getting a job with a big salary, house and a woman/man. That is often how men view themselves and are viewed by others i.e. women. Women's success is coming at the expense of theirs - so long as everyone continues to fights over the same narrow definition of success. Plus things will only get worse as AI, automation etc takes more and more jobs - competition for scarce resources i.e. jobs that result in a good life will only become more extreme.

Yes, we need a more positive view of masculinity but it cant be the same as before just without the toxic bits. That doesnt work. More work needs to be done particularly as the nature of work is changing, the social contract is breaking down. Boys arent wrong in thinking that they cant just go out there and get a job, they cant, the machines are taking over. They are also correct in feeling that this society doesnt work for them, it probably doesn't for an increasing number of them but thats not because they are male, increasingly because Western society doesn't work for most people. So changes are needed but it's even more complex than just phones and/or weak father figures.

What the actual fuck? So if your child goes to private school you don’t work you sit at home and get plastic surgery?

get a fucking grip

I am not sure what you mean, but if it is to do with saying some of the punishments are demotivating and counterproductive, there is a difference between that and correcting poor behaviour in a straightforward, clear, neutral and not over personal way, where expected behaviour is explained, unwanted behaviour managed effectively but with minimum punishments, minimum stress, motivating and positive - teens behave better and do better in those classes.

Research is clear about how to get teens to behave, there are a number of reasons why teens misbehave and there are ways to deal with any and all of them.

So there is probably good classroom management and bad classroom management, and I think pointing that out is okay.

This is the problem, all honesty discussions are not wanted so how can the problems be solved. Of course not All but it just isn't the case that no boys from private schools do not behave in this way.

I teach in an independent boys' school, and whilst the school setting on the show didn't resonate at all (even with my time working in a challenging school in an inner city setting), I have to say that probably the majority of our safeguarding concerns at school are related to the "manosphere" / Andrew Tate culture. It makes me incredibly sad and scared for the future - I increasingly think that there needs to be a massive change in how we parent and approach access to screens/internet generally. Totally agree that there are issues with how parents respond to sanctions issued in school, too.

Your comments were not an “honesty duscussion”, they were misogynistic and offensive