Would you over extend yourself with this house purchase if you were me?

[Proopo]

Dh and I have found just the most gorgeous home. It needs some tlc and modernisation but it could be absolutely spectacular. Location is superb, dog walks would be like a page out of The Wind in the Willows. It feels so rural but it is only a few miles from a very pretty town. Well several. Plus excellent transport links into London

It is at the extreme end of our budget. Dh and I have had some tough few years and were really planning on the next move bringing peace into our Iives. But this opportunity with the house is so compelling.

We would probably put in a brand new kitchen before we moved in and then just do a room at a time. The reception rooms and bedrooms don’t really need doing and the bathrooms are in good nick just very ugly

We really wanted to move somewhere that didn’t need a lick of paint if we were to go towards the top of our budget

Although, I just saw the part about wanting to start a family.

You may find when any future children hit about 10-12 they will (and you as you’ll be a live-in taxi service) find it very annoying being a few miles from the nearest town. When their mates want to meet up after school etc.

That’s pretty far in the future though, still something to consider.

I lived in a similar set up. I got used to waiting for the hourly bus which takes you into town (15 drive away). Just one of life’s compromises.

Very popular village hall is within walking distance as is pub and tiny restaurant. Gym, nursery, library, supermarket is 5-7 min drive away.

you want a 10 year old waiting for an hourly bus when they go to swimming lessons or a playdate?
your teenagers will hate it and lose friends and hobbies.

If you had said you had older DC who were close to leaving home I'd probably have said go for it. Before starting a family? Definitely not. 4 miles from a station is not close IMO, sounds pretty limiting for children growing up. A doer upper is for when you buy at the bottom of your budget not at the top.

Its a huge amount of pressure on you both to commit to something like this.

In this economy with the world the way it is right now.... I wouldnt be stretching myself in any capacity, especially if you want to start a family.

Go for a cheaper house and put aside money for a rainy day.

Don't get caught up in the dream, the reality very rarely lives up to it.

I wouldn't. Especially when I read you want to start a family! I'm a planner and having children has been so much more expensive and stressful (and wonderful don't get me wrong) than I'd ever imagined!

What age are you? Are you likely to earn more in the future? We went to the top of our budget but with salary increases it’s now very manageable.

oh behave with the “your kids will hate you” bs.

PLENTY of families live outside of London and make this stuff work. Yes it’s lifts, drop offs and pick ups, but all parents are in the same boat and you can share the lifts etc.

I got my son a bike, then a moped and now he’s driving.

if I need a lift ANYTIME he’s up for it. He even took me to and from Heathrow last year and was happy to do it.

@Proopo you know what you’re getting into in terms of logistics, and you could always put the kitchen upgrade off for a year until you’re recovered from the expenses of moving and take things slow. Think of the destination, not the journey

if your H is up for it, go for it.

Honestly it’s the exact scenario I had. I had no problems with keeping friends. Everyone is in a similar boat so you plan accordingly. I would just plan around the 10 o’clock bus on Saturdays when I was a teen.

I accept that I will probably have to do a lot of pick ups.

You do know @SchoolDilemma17 many people live in the countryside and survive without the need to live in a big city? Me, my parents, my son - all grew up in a rural community. You don't' 'wait for an hour' for a bus - you go to the bus stop when it's coming and arrange meet up times around that. Never had a problem dropping dc off at friends houses a few miles away either - would probably have done so in a city too.

It hasn't limited us in any way - nearest cities have theatre, arts, music ... and I can actually get there quicker than getting to the west end when I lived in London.

OP your future kids will love the rural life and the freedom. If not this house the another will come along

Will it work financially with mat leave, nursery fees and potentially wanting to drop hours once kids arrive?

What about when your children are teens and going out and about themselves? Without driving how accessible are the amenities?

It sounds fabulous. We have recently moved to a village, probably bigger than this but nonetheless a village and we adore it. It seems an idyllic place to raise a family. If you think you’ll stay put, the survey is basically sound and you can envisage being able to afford the work in due course then go for it. A good house will hold value.

Only one query- when you say ‘wind in the willow’ walks do you mean very close to a riverbank? That might concern me with children.

The only thing I would say is unless you are pretty sure your salaries will go up considerably, make sure you leave room for maternity leave and nursery fees etc. We were paying £1400 for childcare fees at one point and were very glad we went mid budget for our house rather than top of budget.

The village is on The Thames. I grew up in a village on the river also. It was never a problem at all.

If it’s your dream home then I would definitely buy the house. We borrowed the absolute maximum we could many years ago when interest rates were sky high, and we’re spending over 70% of our combined take home pay on the mortgage. It was very difficult to manage for three or four years, but interest rates went down, we got promoted, our salaries increased, and we gradually did the work that was needed. It was the best decision we ever made.

I would look what childcare options are available and how much they cost, see if you can still afford it. If so go for it.

I'd 100% go for it! Sounds like a lovely family home - lucky you!

Is the ‘stretching’ the mortgage or the ‘doing-upping’ ?

If mortgage, then no. If renovations, then maybe. If the house is basically livable, but not to your taste, then yes. If it needs more structural stuff, then no.

I know. I grew up like that and hated it. I was cut off from friends and social life. Good that you liked it.

re hourly bus I was quoting the OP “I got used to waiting for the hourly bus which takes you into town (15 drive away)”

RTFT

The mortgage on this house would be roughly 50% of our income. But dh and I really need a few years of not worrying about money I think. And being able to treat ourselves to meals out, days out etc without feeling guilty.

Sounds lovely but if you are wanting to start a family think through your finances.

Mat leave may mean some unpaid months. Nursery/childcare costs are like another mortgage. Would you want more than 1 child?

The juggle of home/parenting/work results in alot of mothers working less than full-time hours. It's physically and mentally draining.

Are your careers solid in this weird economic climate?

Do you want to live in a house that is frequently undergoing DIY projects? Costs of materials keeps on rising ridiculously so budget well.

Our home has been a project. Been gradual with pregnancies/bringing up a family/having fun as a family.

19 bloody years it took me to get our bedroom re-done.

You could live with that for a while surely? Just paint the cupboards with something Farrow & Ball ish.

I'd go for the house personally and enjoy the location while doing up one room at a time.

Do you have good maternity pay? Plans to reduce hours after going back to work?
also factor in nursery or childminder cost unless you don’t need that.