Child Benefit Rival Claim Ex Partner Earning Loads!!!!!

[ProlongedAffair]

Me and my ex share 50/50 of our two children, it’s not court ordered but has been in place for the past few years. A few months ago I put in a claim for CMS and was awarded it, they see me as the primary carer because I get both children’s child benefits. I also discovered my ex is earning a 6 figure salary.

Last week I got a letter from child benefit saying that he is challenging my claim. I said to the lady that he earns too much to claim and I suspect he’s only claiming so he can try to get out of CMS. She told me that because he has the children for half the time and child benefit isn’t means tested, the likelihood is they will award child benefit one each! Surely that can’t be correct, can anyone advise who has been through their rival claims process?? He will then be able to claim CMS from me!!

So if CB gets split and the OP tries her hardest not to end up having to pay maintenance to him would that make her a mean cunt as well?

Eh.

Yes I did wonder about that as I was typing it 🤣.

In 50 / 50 claims there was a court ruling that HMRC must take into account which parent would stand to benefit more financially from the CB (ie the parent who is lower earner) when making their decision. If they don't do this it's worth challenging through the appeals and court process.

Well then OP can get a job that pays more. They are not a couple and she should not benefit from her exs salary. He has the kids 50% of the time.

But it will impact his children and you cannot escape that

This is my view too. It is petty and mean. They actually care about their children less than getting one over on their ex. For most of us, it was a joint decision as to which parent took the loss on their career to childcare. Yet after one party changes the situation, that joint decision no longer applies, but the lost ground is rarely recoverable.

If the OP is the same one who posted about something remarkably similar a month ago she's on a pretty good wage herself.

And a live laugh love sign? 🙄

My ex has told people that I spend the measly amount of child support he pays on shit like getting my nails done. Never ever had a manicure in my life on my own money let alone child support from him. Exes like who spout that shit are pathetic.

Shouldn't the OP have thought about the impact on her children before she decided to throw away the amicable 50:50 co-parenting arrangement by starting a CMS claim?

But why is it just op to maintain that amicable coparenting relationship? He could still maintain that even with the claim if he wanted to do the best thing by his children

Huh? I mean I suppose he could claim child support from her but he would pay more anyway so would more or less cancel that out given he is a much higher earner. Your point is not the gotcha you think it is.

And anyone who refuses to pay child support is a mean cunt. Obviously.

Was I talking about you?

So if I mention this court ruling there’s a chance they will let me keep both?

I think you were making disparaging comments about lower income parents who make CMS claims

Yes, but that's HER impact if the children don't have everything they have at Dad's at hers.

If they will have a much more comfortable lifestyle at their Dad's, perhaps he should have full custody. Or perhaps we know that in actually children can cope perfectly well with having a slightly higher quality of life with one parent than with another.

Child maintenance is not meant to equalise the homes, otherwise it wouldn't be impacted by overnights and would be adjusted to take into account the RP's income too.

CM is meant to be so that both parents are equally shouldering the costs of raising the child in whatever way would be reasonable if they'd stayed a couple. In a 50/50 arrangement he's done that.

Calm down babe. It’s really not that deep.

That's not the issue here is it.

You've no idea, sorry. The children realise. The spite over the money oozes out in other ways. I treated my DC to something really special for their birthday. The next school holiday my ex took them to the same event, but the more expensive option. My DC told me daddy had done XYZ with them. I smiled sweetly and said you've now done that twice in 1 year, lucky you. What a great time. They mentioned it to me a few years later as they realized it was competition. So we discussed that. That might not happen in families with good co-parenting or in families who are together. Children need to be able to discuss what they are feeling inside about situations. It's horrid.

Hit a nerve with you though didnt it

No. I wasn’t sure whether you were being sarcastic and didn’t actually think that. It’s a shame that you do think that way.

Where’s the drip feed? At least give us a clue?
Who had the prolonged affair?

Sorry you've lost me you've went too deep!

I've been in exactly this situation. 2 children - CHB was awarded one each, and each made a claim for CMS. ExH was a high earner, and paid the difference between what I pay him and what he paid me.

I think you’ve got an absolute cheek to be honest.

Serves you right if you do lose one lot of it.