Dilemma over house wwyd?

[Biglifedecisions]

Crunch decision to make and hoping you can help?

Dh and I are in stable professions and enjoy our jobs - although we are getting more tired, mid fifties with adult dc (18 and 21) We are about to downsize. Staying in the same area.

Would you:

a) Move to house A which is under budget, big enough for dc but not huge and potentially retire early and /or go very part time, and have a healthy savings pot. House is lovely but not exceptional.

b) Move to house B which is slightly over budget, much bigger with a really lovely garden, and it’s a pretty house. It means we will definitely have to work to 60, and in part time after that probably for a few years.

Option A gives us more freedom and options, option B would be a lovely home for us for many years. Wwyd?

YABU House A
YANBU House B

Have you had a big garden before? It's a lot of work. If you're planning to keep working full time if in house b, and already feeling tired, it's not a great plan to take on a big garden as well. I say that as a professional gardener - I have several clients who have bitten of more than they can chew and they ended up feeling down about it until they hired someone to take up the slack.

You asked what the extra money gave us? Indeed the area was a cheaper one, so we did gain some extra equity. We have passed it on to our daughter which has enabled her to have time out with her young children - she'll never get that time back, so we're really pleased to have enabled her to do this!

Do you think there would be a chance of DGC? With house B they could enjoy GP sleepovers, but then with house B you could simply hand them back 😉

Sorry, I’d go with B - you’re only mid-fifties, still so much life to live! And if you are lucky enough to have grandchildren, you want to have enough space for them to be able to come to you, I would say. There’s plenty of time for you to make the decisions/ moves for when you are properly old!

At heart are you home bodies or do you have itchy feet?

I am definitely the former so would go with B, but I have friends who love going off on regular trips and want somewhere they can just lock up and go. Only you can answer that question.

Definitely B - you like it much more and if you're mid 50s then working til 60 shouldn't be too hard. Also, although your children may well leave home, they also might get married and have children and you'll want room for them to come and stay. B sounds like it will be a better bet long term

Which house is future proof in terms of a ground floor bedroom / bathroom? Which house is more practical to grow old in?

Which location would make you happier?

Just read though the whole thread and missed the reason why you want to move now when DC are still in the family home?

Anyway. I’d go for B as a homebody. Have done all the travelling I want and am looking forward to just gardening, reading, pottering and having friends to stay.

If option A doesn’t require much work and is still in a nice area then it’s really no contest imo. I think you can buy a dream house but you can’t buy good health so you need to make the most of it while you’ve got it (once you get into middle age or older). A smaller house is generally more practical in many ways - often for heating costs, amount of time cleaning etc; but also because it forces you to live more minimally with the amount of “stuff” we all accumulate over time.

More free time and the extra money could go on bucket list trips while you are still in good health and with some left for the things that can make life worth living once you eventually get more infirm- days out (on public transport/taxi), good restaurants, treating the kids/grandkids etc

ETA: But that is assuming that House A would still make you happy - if it’s not in as nice an area or it’s so much smaller than what you currently have that it could make your lives more difficult, then it wouldn’t be worth the money saving.

We realised we would have to work to 75 to pay off our mortgage. But it's our forever home and we didn't have property to sell but wanted security of a house and somewhere to work because we both WFH fulltime.

And we realised we both love work too much to ever retire 😂

B because I'm a very "housey" person and that's always where I'd prioritise my spending. I'd get more pleasure from a home I love coming back to than holidays to go on. Completely understand the pull of A though!

B. When you are retired, surprisingly, you need more home space than when you were working. Hobbies, visitors, just room to move, as you are there many more hours a day than when you were working. Also, joy in your surroundings is important as you age.

House A definitely. Assuming you’ve both your own space to retreat to?

Don’t overestimate your energy levels past 60! I enjoy my hobbies and meeting up with friends but I’d rather pay someone to do the garden as it’s definitely getting too much for my DH (70’s) to manage now, although he won’t admit it.

(2 acres plus Poly tunnel)

A. I’m a naturally cautious person & also want to retire as young as possible so that clouds my judgement though!

A all the way. I'd much rather go part time and enjoy life. Is there possibly an option c - suitable for longer term as you get older but you could fall in live with it

This thread feels as conflicted as we are! I want to go with my heart, maybe I am too old to go with my heart and should be practical.

After all, we may never recover from a mistake made now.

I can do my job well into much older age (my colleague was 78 when she finally retired) it’s the kind of job that people like to do as they get older without being obscure. It has longevity, assuming I stay healthy and well.

Dh can retire, if he needs to and do some work from home. So the coffers won’t run completely dry unless we both keel over and then it’s not a problem anyway!

We have to move from here, as the running costs for two people and a small dog are ridiculous. Even the bigger house out of the two will be a significant improvement already.

Op there is really one person aside from your own you should care about on this issue

Your husband’s

What is his view?

For what it’s worth, B all the way for me simply because of how I hope my retirement will pan out…. With my children very much seeing my home as a place for them to come to whenever they please with or without their families.

Plus… whilst I’m no gardener, nothing brings me joy more than being outside in the garden with my family

People make a home. Not a garden and curb appeal

Option A

huh?

for many many many people their garden is and intrinsic part of their “home”

Your OP seemed to suggest that with house B you’d both need to work well beyond 60 part time (assuming your employers agree) have you done maths on scenarios, and what ages you might need to be when you finish work? If not would do that.

Option A or keep looking.

B. You need more room as they get older as they bring back partners and children and friends... However can understand why you like a too. What house do you see yourself living in...

I'm saying life is about the people you are with and a work life balance not a garden you can't enjoy because you are working.