Dilemma over house wwyd?

[Biglifedecisions]

Crunch decision to make and hoping you can help?

Dh and I are in stable professions and enjoy our jobs - although we are getting more tired, mid fifties with adult dc (18 and 21) We are about to downsize. Staying in the same area.

Would you:

a) Move to house A which is under budget, big enough for dc but not huge and potentially retire early and /or go very part time, and have a healthy savings pot. House is lovely but not exceptional.

b) Move to house B which is slightly over budget, much bigger with a really lovely garden, and it’s a pretty house. It means we will definitely have to work to 60, and in part time after that probably for a few years.

Option A gives us more freedom and options, option B would be a lovely home for us for many years. Wwyd?

YABU House A
YANBU House B

Some would say if you're getting tired and wasn't to down size, less rooms to clean/redecorate, then go for option A. If you were willing to and are physically able to work into your 60's, then go for option B, the bigger house that you'll be more likely to retire into and be your 'forever' house, and you'll have enough space for Children (and potentially grandchildren in future. There's pros and cons to both 🤷‍♀️

Yes - I think find a nicer house A. money in your pocket is priceless at the moment and to help others if you need to. But you still need to feel happy in your home.

Do not move to a retirement village.

Pick Option A. Your children will leave and may be a flight away to visit.

Buy House A;you can always add home improvements to make it the house of your dreams

Would post the houses but it will be very outing.

House A feels just okay. Ticks boxes and I don’t feel enthusiastic.

House B is exactly what I would love to have, but ofc it is more money.

DC undecided on next move still. Young dc doing a gap year, older dc doing masters. No idea where they will land. So hard to tell how long they might be at home.

Such insightful posts, thank you. So many things we haven’t considered.

If house A is definitely “lovely” as you describe it then I’d go for that. But then I dam not hugely motivated by having an “exceptional” house. I’d rather have a lovely one and enjoy my life more. Travel, experiences, less working….

A lot of people want an exceptional house to show it off and as a marker of success. But if you genuinely feel it will really bring you joy despite working more to pay for it then go for it.

I would choose A, but that is because where I live is not all that important to me. An okay home is good enough for me, and travelling, having experiences elsewhere etc. is my priority. But for some people, having a home they love is most important of all, in which case, choose B or keep on looking. Which choice is right depends on where your priorities lie.

Similar age. I’d do B, in fact I’m considering it now. I want a house I love.

I guessed before I voted most would go for A
I went for B

You sound like you’d prefer the B option despite having to work a little longer so I’d say …..go for B or you’ll live to regret it.

Thats what I would do too.

A. But my FiL died at 54 shortly after taking early retirement and my partner had a stroke at 57 that I'm convinced was in large part due to stress at work, so my judgement is probably impacted by that.

With my Sensible Hat on I'd choose A for all the reasons people say - you never know about health, lower running costs, easier to maintain, more financial security etc.
However...
We did something similar and went for the B option. When you're retired your home is so much more than 4 walls and a garden, and you develop a lifestyle you cannot begin to imagine just now. We paid more than anticipated for our home but it has brought us such joy. I've had several bouts of ill health and being where we are has made a huge difference to me.

Plus your finances change in ways you don't anticipate when you don't go to work everyday, even if WFH. And whilst you're working you can 'future proof' your house.
It's a tricky one. Good luck!

Absolutely.
We spend a lot of time in our home surroundings.
When we’re finished refurbing this one despite dh already just retired we will still move to a house we love. We won’t be ‘doing the downsizing thing’ we’ll just be moving again.

Option B. You’re too young to downsize and once you’ve done it you can’t upsize as easily if you find you’re short of space. Revisit in five years by which time the house will have appreciated in value.

Dh and I made this choice but much younger. We paid off our mortgage on our 3 bed semi aged late 30s, I inherited and had been lucky enough to have had a well paid job previously. I don’t need to work anymore; which I’m thankful for because I now have complex health issues. Dh works very short hours at a job which is walking distance away. We could have moved to a much larger house, bigger garden, got a small mortgage to bridge the difference but we decided we’re happy here. We have the space we need and we plough the money we save in heating costs / bills etc into fantastic holidays.

I’ve been in the position of having a large home before and to be honest it was just a headache. More maintenance, more stuff to accumulate, heating etc more expensive. I’d never want that again.

A. I don’t want to work any longer than I have to.

One thing to consider though is the area. Friends parents moved to a village and now feel very trapped as they can’t drive now and it’s hard to get to shops etc.

Some friends of mine bought a house B a couple of years ago [early 60s] and they regret it. House and garden take up a lot of time and energy as well as cash. They are now talking about selling up and buying a house A.

A

It's big enough and nice enough and all else being equal it's cheaper and easier to run and maintain - and would avoid the need to downsize

Giving up work a bit early , or being made redundant , is just grand

A - you never know what the future holds, this gives you peace of mind and resources to enjoy early retirement.

For me, it would depend if you wanted to move again a few years down the line in order to downsize. We made a big move 16 months ago, a long awaited move to the coast, and we absolutely love it, but the move itself was so stressful, we hadn’t moved for 15 years, and we have both said we are definitely not moving again! So just something to bear in mind, along with the expense obviously.

Which house is the better long term investment? What if one of you dies or gets a life-long illness that needs specialist care, will you have the funds for that if you sell the smaller house, or will you only have them if you own and sell the larger one?

I would think past your immediate life / work balance gratification and consider these things, plus how much do you want to leave your kids, a few tens of thousands each, or more than that?

I think I'd keep looking. Downsizing is so emotive and it means different things to different people. But ultimately you do need to move to a house that you absolutely love.

We had a large cottage with a huge garden with an orchard. Think country idyll - juicing apples, growing my own plants from seed, etc. etc. Didn't really think about the future, although we were early retired at this stage, until one day my daughter, who was expecting our first grandchild, asked if we would consider moving nearer. For context, due to various family inheritances we were already mortgage free.

Suddenly so much to think about - did we want to move, what type of house and garden did we want which would be suitable but we would still love? Obviously we factored in the rationale of some type of downshifting to future proof us. We sold our cottage really quickly which concentrated our minds.

We found a modern house about twenty years old which belonged to a young couple. It's in a lovely village. The small-ish garden was a blank canvas as she was busy with her numerous young children. It did however have some mature trees which was a bonus for us. It was much cheaper, in a beautiful country area but near amenities and public transport and as soon as I saw it, I fell in love with it and could see us being really happy here. I still have cold frames to grow my plants, we have a spare room downstairs should the need arise for downstairs sleeping and it's so light compared with our cottage. The grandchildren have a bedroom here, my husband has a hobbies room and I have a dressing room. We swapped a woodburner for a gas woodburner looking stove, instant heat and comfort. So while we downsized on the garden size, the house is actually about the same size, although with an extra bedroom. I'm not sure I could have parted with my previous cottage if I hadn't fallen in love with our current house. You can still have an absolutely beautiful garden, even though it's smaller.

We've been here over five years now and I'm still very happy. One thing I would say, from experience, although we're both pretty fit, you do begin to notice your energy lessening by your late sixties.

Do a checklist also to cover the practicalities so you don't deviate too much also. Head versus heart!

However, you've both worked hard, you do deserve to live in a house that you love. Don't shortchange yourself.

I would go for B

As another poster said life is for living (she chose A though). If this is going to be where you will live potentially for the rest of your life live somewhere you love rather than where it is okay. Enjoy your surroundings. There may come a time when you aren't able to travel or get around much so make sure you are somewhere you truly enjoy being rather than somewhere you can put up with.

If you don’t feel enthusiastic about A, I don’t think you should go for it. This will probably be your last opportunity to go for a house you really love. As long as you enjoy work and enjoy gardening (and are prepared to possibly have to pay for gardening help in 15/20 years time) I’d say go for B. If just the thought of going for B makes you feel happy and excited, and not worried, it’s the right choice!

Another thing to consider is if you downsize to a smaller place you could release equity to help your kids get on the property ladder.

A for me. In your mid 50s I would be looking towards retirement and anything which delayed that would not be appealing for me. We retired at 58 but hadn't moved for 30 years and still in the same house now. If you are staying in the same area why move at all?