To expect people not to take over my seat on the plane

[WhyNotUsehis]

Warning - RANT

If you can't keep your body within the confines of your seat, then either purchase 2 seats or accept the right of your fellow passengers to drop a guillotine between the seats

Why do I have to spend my flight being constantly hit by passing passengers, stewards and trollies as I'm wedged so tightly up against the aisle armrest that my shoulder is hanging out into the aisle and I'm tilted so much into the aisle that my side/back is in agony

I'm not asking you to give me part of your seat, just allow me to have use of my own

Quite right. I was terribly worried about my rolls of fat spilling into the space of someone like DazedDragon but the enormous shoulders of the young man in the next seat forced me to lean into the aisle anyway. Aeroplane seats are small, deal with it.

I went to a concert last year with my DD and as it was about to start two women sat on my other side. The chair arms were fitted so the women had to squeeze into the seats, bulging above and below the bar into me (they were both overweight so the one by me was also pushed by her friend). I'm not overweight but average build and thankfully DD has a small build so I was able to lean her way crossing my legs, but it did mean I was at an angle.
The women could have chosen to stand as it was also available and the bars cutting in both sides must have been more uncomfortable for me than them. I suppose they thought the seats would accommodate them as they would move the armrests (and move onto the sides of others).
In flights, one option moving forward is bigger armrests that don't move. You could pay for the size extra seats (new seats for those who are larger).
Before I am flamed, my partner is over 6ft and built like a rugby player. He wouldn't have booked to sit (if he'd gone to the concert) and would pay more for additional room in seats.

Yes, it's embarrassing to have to challenge someone encroaching into your space, but the "strange man" is confined to an airborne plane. You are actually quite safe to challenge as the flight crew can support you

@HotPotatoesies here's the details. And if you do this they can't give the seat away if they overbook the plane as you 'check in' for it so it won't look empty on the system.

Thanks, I saw that earlier. We rarely fly Ryanair so just trying to work out if BA do something similar. Seems more complicated with them though! Have to call and then potentially wait a few days etc. Definitely not as straightforward as it could be!

I also wouldn't put it past them to try to allocate two seats on different rows - as they would assume that you were two people travelling together and thus want to make more money off you by separating you by default and then charging extra to sit together!

It does often seem that the airlines themselves can be as big CFs as the over-encroaching fellow passengers. They'll happily let you pay double for two seats for a very large person, but will then treat your second (paid-for) seat as an available spare and seek to re-allocate it and leave them wedged in uncomfortably anyway.

My DP is 6ft 4 and big build.. he has to spread his legs on flights or would be really uncomfortable

Why is his comfort more important than the comfort of the person who has paid for the seat next to him?

The reasonable thing there would be for him to be in a window or aisle seat & you in the middle seat, so at least he’s not encroaching on strangers.

I once had a manspreader next to me on a Loganair flight. If anyone knows Loganair, you'll know those planes are small.

I waited till he moved his leg back into his space as he adjusted himself in his seat, and moved my leg to the edge of my chair space. Very quickly, his leg was right up against mine. I didn't move. After about three minutes of our legs touching, he moved his back a little.

I wouldn't have confronted him, not in my nature (not unless he was doing an Andrew Scott style manspread). But we paid for the same amount of space, so he's not getting mine!

Then he should book an aisle or extra leg room seat. Not use some of mine.

I understand that the table is not on the armrest but next to it, vertically. So the man can use the armrest but not move his elbow past the end of the armrest onto OP’s space.

Then he should pay for extra legroom seats?

You need to simply tell them to move over.

If it is a fat person with no ability to do so then just suck it up I am afraid.

Does "big build" also mean big bollocks because if his balls are normal sized then there's no benefit to spreading his legs apart is there?

Unless his stomach is so enormous it hangs down between his legs??

What about sharing armrests? Courtesy rules say that the passenger sitting in the middle should have the use of both armrests as the passenger by the window has a bit more space between their armrest and the window, and the passenger by the aisle can stretch out in the aisle a bit.

I recently came back from a 14 hours flight where I was stuck in the middle. To my right, by the window, sat a young woman who, for the duration of the flight, kept her arm on the armrest she shared with me. I didn’t want to say anything as it would be so awkward to then have to sit next to her for hours on end. I would ocassionally try to put my elbow on the armrest just behind hers hoping she’d get the message or just withdraw her arm as I was uncomfortable for both of us to be on the armrest. She didn’t. I don’t get how some people have such little awareness or consideration

It’s because they’re selfish and entitled. And quite often no-one challenges them so the entitlement gets worse / doesn’t change. I don’t think it’s size related most of the time, it’s just a lifetime of only thinking about themselves. Sad but true.

Or he could accept he needs to pay a bit extra for a bulkhead seat or extra legroom seat? Or angle himself in a window seat or aisle seat to make best use of the space.

It’s completely unreasonable of him to think that pressing himself up against a stranger is the solution and I bet he only does this to female passengers sitting next to him and not to aggressive looking men!

But unless I missed it, OP said tablet, not table?

You are not unreasonable at all. Not flaming coming from me OP.
In fact, airlines should enforce that if you are over a certain BMI you should buy two seats and not allowed to travel at all if beyond a certain threshold.
And people should be prepared to be refused to board the plane if they don't comply with this criteria, the same way you would not allow someone who is sick, drunk, or disorderly.

Omg. I had this happen on the last flight I went on. A man was proper manspreading and his entire leg was right up against mine and he was using both arm rests. I swapped seats with my husband and surprise surprise, it totally stopped.

Ridiculous my partner is the same height, he crosses his ankles so his legs fit in his seat space. Your man is very entitled!!

People sometimes seem to think that if they can physically sit in the seat, it means they fit, ignoring the fact that their arms are covering the arm rests entirely and they’re in someone else’s space. Airlines should routinely ask if people need comfort seats and hold people accountable if they say no when they should have said yes.

This is making me think of the manspreading driving test examiner I had! Kept bashing his knee every time I changed gear; it was super distracting and I failed the test.
Next test the examiner was a very overweight man who therefore found it harder not to spread, but the moment I accidentally brushed his knee he apologised and crammed himself away from me and stayed like that for the rest of the test.

Men can do it, they just choose not to.

Little known fact. The convention is the middle seated person gets the use of both armrests. I only found this out recently.

However there is no excuse for overspilling into another's space.