To go to the toilet at work?

[Bornnotbourne]

Recently started working in a school as an assistant. I’ve had part of bowel removed and disclosed this in my interview as I have a gap in my CV. I was pulled up on going to the toilet yesterday by the SLT, there were enough staff looking after the kids and I had asked another staff member. She said she expects me to go straight from one task to another (I.e looking after them inside to outside).
Should I remind her that I have a re-sected bowel? Or just wear a pad? I’m really embarrassed about my bowels and it’s something I haven’t even spoken to my family about. I go to a public toilet before work and generally only go once in work.

I'm a TA
No way would anyone in my school make a comment about me using the loo
We are grown adults..if we need the loo we need the loo.

I have had similar, with part of my rectum lost so it's definately a thing, particularly when I have eaten. I suspect the SLT hasn't linked the two things.

Just let them know and they should feel embarrassed.

@KezzaMucklowe i have endometriosis too. I had a similar problem with my previous career that I had to give up as I was bleeding so heavily that I needed to change clothes mid shift. The managers wouldn’t let me go to the toilet so I was bleeding through my clothes in front of service users. Had my bowel re-sected as it had stuck on my ovary. Feel shit about myself to be honest

@Bornnotbourne that sounds really lousy. Unless you had left children unsupervised I can't understand why any colleague would criticise you for going to the toilet.

My friend has similar issues and is a teacher. In her school the teaching staff and TAs have cards that, if they need to be covered for a short time like this, they just send to the office with a child and someone from the office will just stand in for 5 mins

Did you fill in an occupational health form when you started? If not, you need to speak to them or at least your line manager about the reasonable adjustments you need to accommodate your disability and they would then be shared with the SMT. It's important you tell them you consider it a disability so it's legally covered. Read about this on the HSE website.

They may not have understood that you will need to go and likely not be able to wait. Do you have a 'I can't wait' card and/or a Radar key? Hubby had both after a bowel resection and made life easier.

Without being too gross I only have a bowel movement once a day so I read the legalisation and didn’t think I fitted into it as it that’s not really unusual.
I do have a radar key but no card.
I only go at work before I go out as the building is locked and I have to get another member of staff to let me in (I’m not allowed keys/fob) and we’re often dealing with playground incidents so I thought it better to go before I go out.

Somehow I knew this would be school related, even though it didn't say so in the title. Such a twisted attitude to basic needs. I'm sorry this is happening and hope your union rep gets it sorted. DON'T offer to wear a pad, it makes it your problem and you should not have to do that at work. Please be as kind to yourself as you can, it's not you, it's them.

Speak to your union rep. I would consider this to be discrimination on the grounds of disability.
Is your disclosure about your health condition written down anywhere and did you explain the consequences?

Bloody hell, how to win friends and influence people, eh?

Remind your manager verbally and then put it in an email so that there is a record. They've most likely forgotten, or not aware your medical condition. If the problem persists, then take it to your union rep, but the sledgehammer approach rarely does you any favours and going through life with the view that everyone is discriminating against you, as the PP suggests, will make you very unhappy, when there's probably just been a lack of communication.

Don't wear pads, you are entitled to use the toilet and its wrong that it's causing you stress. X

She doesn't need to tell anyone she has spoken to her union rep, neither does the union rep have to speak to anyone or disclose the conversation. That wasn't what I was suggesting. It is useful to get correct advice before speaking to your manager/boss.

I'm a nurse with endo and I'll admit I do wear a cup and night pad because I can't always nip away if it's a clinical emergency. However it's rare that this happens and I can't get someone to have my back for 5 minutes to let me go sort myself. As a charge nurse I also would go out of my way to find someone to cover especially if someone had a diagnosed bowel condition.

I have heard these stories about schools restricting toileting but can't believe they are doing it to staff as well as pupils. Please do not pad up, discuss with your manager and get reasonable adjustments put in place. You shouldn't have to get reasonable adjustments in place because no one should be restricting toilet trips (especially well timed ones once a day!), but when dealing with heavy handed management you absolutely have legislation on your side.

Exactly. It needs to be clearly understood as a reasonable adjustment. I don't think most of the posters here understand that teaching staff generally can't just go to the toilet in the way that other employees can. However you need to be able to.
There shouldn't be any need to involve your union immediately, but I do hope you've taken out membership. ETA I see you are a member.

As a teacher, I knew you would be working in a school just from the thread title.

Not the same, but when I was pregnant, I found it really difficult to go for a wee and /or vomit. I once literally ran out of a class to avoid throwing up on year 9 and couldn't wait for my line manager to stand in.

The chances are that SLT have forgotten. You need to send them an email reminding them. Make sure it's over email so you have it (and their response) in writing as if it does need union intervention later, they'll want to see these emails.

Hopefully though, SLT has forgotten or just not understood how frequently you have to go and they'll apologise and then leave you alone.

Oh @Bornnotbourne i just wanted to say I hope you can get this situation at work sorted. It sounds like you’ve had a really rough ride of it and i Just wanted to wish you all the best.

@endofthelinefinally yes I’m going to only informally approach the union rep, I want her advice on what is normal for schools and how best to approach SLT.
I very rarely see SLT, in fact I don’t think I even see them once a week so very difficult to raise issues when needed.

Another jumped up SLT in a school on a power trip, they can be serious dicks. I would go to the head but obviously you don't want to make trouble- sadly schools can be a bit corrupt so actually union is the only way - or just ignore, knowing that that person is a MASSIVE TURD.

(No comment on the OP’s situation, but I’m gobsmacked that so many people seem to think a teacher can just leave her class unattended to go to the toilet. What do you think secondary teachers are doing?).

@BitOutOfPractice thanks for your kind words. I’ve been up since four thinking about it and I’m quite tearful thinking about the day ahead. Luckily most of the kids are absolute bundles of kindness and happiness so I can look forward to seeing them today.

Are you a teaching assistant, or midday/lunch supervisor?

I’m actually gobsmacked that SLT would pull you up on going to the toilet (you’re a fully grown adult, ffs. It’s bad enough to restrict the kids’ toilet access). Mind you, I’m not entirely surprised. Being treated like one of the kids is one of the great number of reasons I have left teaching.

I agree it's best just to speak to SLT first before going running to the union. Most matters can easily be sorted without the need for this.

Are you primary or secondary? I am guessing secondary as you say you don't see SLT that often - can you drop them an email (or their PA) to arrange a meeting to discuss this?
I also find it strange you say you can't access the toilet anyway at work without asking someone else to let you in the building. This all seems very odd.

She's a TA, and are teachers supposed to just wet their pants???

The union will provide some advice although I’d be surprised if you didn’t get a reasonable response if you popped this in an email. I’m sure SLT have probably forgotten and any employer, including schools, legally have to agree to provide this type of adjustment (given it is so simple, no cost, no equipment related, where it relates to a disability/long term health condition. Good luck,

@claudiaswinklemen in my son's secondary they have staff who are non-teaching who will come and sit in on a class to allow a staff member with a medical problem to go to the toilet as they have double periods so 2 hour lessons. People often cannot hold a much needed wee. My friend's bladder is held up with a sling due to two large babies. She times her drinks but sometimes needs to go mid lesson just like some students. The teachers all have walkie talkies for any behaviour issues that need back up in class.

Agreed. My classroom was up three flights of stairs. On one occasion I did have an urgent need to go to the toilet and there were no other staff around to cover. I was told off by a deputy head who saw me out of class, despite the fact that the class I'd left was a small group of 6th form pupils!