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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Was I an interfering know it all?

62 replies

adarkspringday · 27/02/2025 16:13

At a farm today I was behind a family with young children and I heard one of them say they were going to see the sheep.

I said ‘you’ve gone past them, they are back there’ and gave specific directions.

The mum said ‘well they used to be but there is a sign up saying they’ve moved.’ Turned out they had moved. I said sorry and that was that. Then heard the mum in the gift shop saying something like ‘well, found the sheep despite that interfering know it all trying to send us the opposite way!’

Was I an interfering know it all?

Yabu yes
yanbu no you were being helpful.

OP posts:
NormasArse · 27/02/2025 16:14

Nasty woman- no need for that.

Dotjones · 27/02/2025 16:16

You should probably have stayed out of it to be honest. Giving unprovoked advice, especially unprovoked advice that is wrong, leaves you open to being seen as an "interfering know-it-all" or other less polite terms.

If you were a man (or are a man!) this would be classic mansplaining.

mintbug · 27/02/2025 16:16

You were trying to help. It's not you were flexing your knowledge of sheep placement.

Rainbow1235 · 27/02/2025 16:22

adarkspringday · 27/02/2025 16:13

At a farm today I was behind a family with young children and I heard one of them say they were going to see the sheep.

I said ‘you’ve gone past them, they are back there’ and gave specific directions.

The mum said ‘well they used to be but there is a sign up saying they’ve moved.’ Turned out they had moved. I said sorry and that was that. Then heard the mum in the gift shop saying something like ‘well, found the sheep despite that interfering know it all trying to send us the opposite way!’

Was I an interfering know it all?

Yabu yes
yanbu no you were being helpful.

U was just bein helpful I would’ve said same as u too . No pleasing some peaple .

Changingplace · 27/02/2025 16:22

You were trying to help, she was rude and her comments were unnecessary.

I had a similar situation recently, heard some people getting on the tram near me sounding confused & talking about getting two tickets at the machine because they were going to X place via a main station, I just turned to them and said, ‘oh you don’t need two tickets, just buy it to your destination or you can tap in and out’

Instead of saying thanks or even acknowledging I was trying to help one of them muttered something about me being a ‘Karen’ and carried on buying the wrong ticket 🙄

ethelredonagoodday · 27/02/2025 16:24

You were trying to be helpful. The other woman sounds like a nob.

RachelLikesTea · 27/02/2025 16:26

No good deed goes unpunished! The times I have learned this.

Hdjdb42 · 27/02/2025 16:32

You were just being helpful. Don't worry about some rude people.

Happyinarcon · 27/02/2025 16:32

I find it hard to believe this happened

SeaShellsSanctuary1 · 27/02/2025 16:33

Ewe gave gave some baa'd advice to the kids

(Yes i know kids are goats not sheep....I read it on the sign) 🙂

Crankyaboutfood · 27/02/2025 16:33

literally nothing wrong—you tried to be helpful. that mom is crank

marsunin · 27/02/2025 16:34

Dotjones · 27/02/2025 16:16

You should probably have stayed out of it to be honest. Giving unprovoked advice, especially unprovoked advice that is wrong, leaves you open to being seen as an "interfering know-it-all" or other less polite terms.

If you were a man (or are a man!) this would be classic mansplaining.

🙄🙄🙄

BallerinaRadio · 27/02/2025 16:34

I wouldn't have given it a second thought tbh

BananaBubbless · 27/02/2025 16:35

You were only trying to help but this is exactly why I always keep my mouth shut around strangers. You never know how they’re going to react.

Completelyjo · 27/02/2025 16:35

I don’t think she has to be grateful, you might have tried to be helpful but you did actually give the wrong advice.

Ineedanotherholidaynow · 27/02/2025 16:35

Ewe were only trying to help…

Dollydaydream100 · 27/02/2025 16:36

What a nasty cow (her).

Strange woman - don't give it another thought.

BobbyBiscuits · 27/02/2025 16:36

I think you're a little U for being that bothered, but equally calling you that was unnecessary.
I occasionally do vocalise an instruction about a location of something if I know it well and the people right next to me seem lost.
You were simply trying to help. That other family were rude but don't let it fuss you.

ItGhoul · 27/02/2025 16:36

I think you were slightly know-it-allish. They hadn't asked you for your help, you just earwigged on their conversation. And also, you were wrong because they'd seen the sign and you hadn't - and it's quite irksome that you just assumed they'd made a mistake and weren't capable of finding something for themselves.

However, I get that you did mean well, and I certainly wouldn't have called you an interfering know-it-all out loud. I'd have been a bit irritated but I'd have kept it to myself.

user2848502016 · 27/02/2025 16:36

Yes you were tbh but she didn't need to be nasty about it

BananaBubbless · 27/02/2025 16:37

Changingplace · 27/02/2025 16:22

You were trying to help, she was rude and her comments were unnecessary.

I had a similar situation recently, heard some people getting on the tram near me sounding confused & talking about getting two tickets at the machine because they were going to X place via a main station, I just turned to them and said, ‘oh you don’t need two tickets, just buy it to your destination or you can tap in and out’

Instead of saying thanks or even acknowledging I was trying to help one of them muttered something about me being a ‘Karen’ and carried on buying the wrong ticket 🙄

I hope they got a fine for having the wrong ticket 😁

sugarspiceandeverythingnice12 · 27/02/2025 16:37

I think your intention was to be kind and helpful

It may have come across as 'know it all' or the other person may be a nasty piece of work who chooses to see the negative

wizzywig · 27/02/2025 16:38

In my head I would be brave and say to those kids "look over there. There's a bitch" but that's me

Derbee · 27/02/2025 16:41

You meant well, and she didn’t need to be unpleasant about it. But it’s annoying to listen to someone’s conversation, join in uninvited to give them advice/direction whilst also being wrong. I’d find it irritating and think you were a bit interfering but I wouldn’t bitch about it

HawkersNorth · 27/02/2025 16:42

I'm sorry bit I'm going against the grain here. They weren't talking to you, they weren't lost and looking for help so I'm not sure why you felt the need to step in. To me that is interfereing.