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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to feel sad that my 10-year-old prefers coffee over our family tea time?

106 replies

LoveMyLittleOnes · 27/02/2025 03:56

Hi everyone, I could use some advice here. My little one is 10 now, and has recently taken a liking to coffee. Our family has always been more into tea, and he used to love joining us for tea time, enjoying the cuppa we made for him. Now, he makes his own coffee and doesn’t join us for tea anymore. Sometimes, I want to relive or share those tea moments with him, but he seems a bit resistan. Part of me wants to barge in and demand he join us for a proper brew, but another part’s screaming “He’s 10 going on 16 – let him live!”

Am I being a clingy wally clinging to the Tea time days? Or should I nip this flat white nonsense in the bud before he starts charging us rent for using the kettle? 😂"

OP posts:
Littlebrownfreckle · 27/02/2025 04:00

A 10 year old shouldn’t be drinking coffee. He’s too young for that level of caffeine.

does he actually like coffee or is he adding sugar to it?

Safxxx · 27/02/2025 04:02

Why can't he enjoy his coffee ☕ with you all together? My eldest likes coffee more my youngest tea, my middle one likes both....each to their own.

Eastie77Returns · 27/02/2025 04:02

A 10 year old should not be drinking coffee. The medical guidance on this is quite clear.

PickledElectricity · 27/02/2025 04:02

I hope it's decaff? What a bizarre thread.

sykadelic · 27/02/2025 04:02

Im more concerned about drinking caffeine at his young age, but I understand the feeling of loss.

You could ask him to come and sit with you all, at least once in a while.

Good luck

EverybodyLovesString · 27/02/2025 04:04

Why are you allowing a ten year old to drink coffee? That’s far too much caffeine for his age.

Natsku · 27/02/2025 04:20

My mum made me start drinking coffee around ten years old! So that I could get used to it before I got older and invited round people's houses for coffee.... hated the stuff at first.

Why can't he drink his coffee with you all while you have your tea? Though also, he's growing up, its natural to want to spend less time with your family as you grow up.

boulevardofbrokendreamss · 27/02/2025 04:25

Cuppa makes me feel sick.

He shouldn't be drinking coffee unless it's decaf. Why can't he drink that at the same time? Family tea time sounds mad.

Cheesetoastiees · 27/02/2025 04:28

Give him decaf, far too young.

Rabssccuttlefissh · 27/02/2025 04:32

What have I just read? 😮

HelmholtzWatson · 27/02/2025 04:32

For the ones pearl clutching about caffeine content, there can be as much caffeine in black tea as coffee, depending on the strength.

That said, I don't drink caffeine in the afternoon as it will disrupt sleep, and I don't think a child should either.

Needmorelego · 27/02/2025 04:37

Don't buy coffee then.
If it's not in the house he can't drink it.
I also don't know many ten year olds that like tea either (my 16 year old will drink ice tea).

beencaughttrollin · 27/02/2025 04:39

One can drink coffee at Tea. Only perhaps don't post about it on MumsNet as some may get the hump over creeping Americanisation. Which, come to think of it, may be a real concern - has he also been making his own Frito Pie and saying "movies"?

Biscuitsnotcookies · 27/02/2025 04:53

You have some strange expectations of him.

The coffee should be swapped for hot chocolate until he is older. It’s a strange practice having a tea time these days. I imagine you are hankering after the connection with him, so find a few hobby or activity to do together. How about introducing a game such as double?

Channellingsophistication · 27/02/2025 05:10

10 is too young to be drinking coffee. If he really likes the taste give him decaf!

fruitpastille · 27/02/2025 05:15

Have Hot Drink Time instead. Two of mine drink tea but the middle one prefers coffee.

polkadotclip · 27/02/2025 05:16

Why on earth has a ten year old been given either tea or coffee?

But that crazy decision to give them access to these aside, how does it matter what drink he is drinking at the same time as another person is drinking something?

The idea of sitting down as a family is in no way impacted by one person having a glass of milk or water while another drinks cocoa!

OnlyMabelInTheBuilding · 27/02/2025 05:18

Join you for teatime? Is it served in the drawing room with cucumber sandwiches by people from downstairs?

All sounds very formal. People should drink what they want, but kids shouldn’t be drinking coffee.

OneLemonDog · 27/02/2025 05:22

We had similar, except that with our 10 year old it was tequila slammers.

Sadlyspendingmoney · 27/02/2025 05:25

Do... Do some of you not know coffee and black tea both have approx same amount of caffeine? Black tea actually generally has more per portion than nescafe for example?

Like this thread is obvious a wind up (yet another) but it's actually concerning how many people don't know black tea has quite an amount of caffeine?

Deedeesharpwhatkindoflady · 27/02/2025 05:30

Rabssccuttlefissh · 27/02/2025 04:32

What have I just read? 😮

A pile of crap
That concludes the early morning episode of jackanory.

DetectiveSleuth · 27/02/2025 05:33

How odd, for a couple of reasons.

  1. Odd that a child of that age even likes coffee.
  2. How exactly does it infringe on tea time? Can’t he just drink coffee whilst you drink tea? You sound a bit controlling
MissedItByThisMuch · 27/02/2025 05:35

I feel your pain. My 10 yo just won’t join in with family gin hour - insists scotch is his drink, the Philistine. Honestly, kids these days! Perhaps try offering him a tot of rum with his tea? That might persuade him.

borntobequiet · 27/02/2025 05:38

OneLemonDog · 27/02/2025 05:22

We had similar, except that with our 10 year old it was tequila slammers.

I hear ketamine infusions are popular nowadays.

ChicaWowWow · 27/02/2025 05:50

What!??!?!?!?!?!?!!? Why on earth are you allowing him to have coffee? Even tea, is fucking weird at this age, it also has caffeine. Also, let's say we ignore that, why can't he drink his coffee with you drinking tea. I don't get it. Why can't you have different drinks at the same table? Sorry, but this is all utter nonsense.