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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

House dilemma (with diagram)

213 replies

OneGreyBiscuit · 26/02/2025 08:42

Need some quick thoughts for this please as I'm on a timer. I went to look at a house through social housing yesterday, it's mine if I want it. There's a new bathroom and kitchen although everywhere else needs tlc. My main issue is that the next door neighbours have access to the back garden from their property, would this put anyone off? Diagram for looking at below. The arrows is where next door can walk through.

House dilemma (with diagram)
OP posts:
RIPVPROG · 26/02/2025 09:20

I saw this on love it or list it recently, it meant they couldn't extend at the back of the house so that's worth considering too.
Not sure I'd want people just walking through the garden either, but I've got young DC

RIPVPROG · 26/02/2025 09:21

Sorry I didn't realise it was HA, if you like the rest of it, take it and look for a swap longer term, I know it can be difficult to be offered something decent

SillySeal · 26/02/2025 09:22

OneGreyBiscuit · 26/02/2025 09:18

Yes it's the rules I'm afraid, so nothing I can do about it

In that case is there any way to find out how often they use your garden for access? If it's once a week I would be OK, if it were multiple times per day I would absolutely hate it.

The only other option would be to do as PP suggested and make part of your garden private.

ViscountessBridgerton · 26/02/2025 09:24

Lol at the boobies. Great diagram.

OneGreyBiscuit · 26/02/2025 09:25

Babbitbaddit · 26/02/2025 09:16

I don’t think it’s a deal breaker for me. How likely are you to be offered another house if you reject this one?

This is my first offer after being on the list since July 2023, relatively short compared to a lot of the country.

OP posts:
IsLarryFromSomething · 26/02/2025 09:26

We have this, our neighbour uses it daily as she comes out of her back door. It's not a problem at all, there's a path which is her access route and she doesn't longer or go anywhere but the path. Sometimes when we are at work she or her daughter will bring in our bin too as they're on the way.

mynamechangemyrules · 26/02/2025 09:27

I have exactly this, in the house I own. I was so worried about it! It's fine :-)
My neighbours put their bins out via my garden once a week (and take and return mine too 💕) and if they use their bikes they go out that way, maybe twice a week.
I work and the kids are at school, it's no big deal for us.

OneGreyBiscuit · 26/02/2025 09:27

SillySeal · 26/02/2025 09:22

In that case is there any way to find out how often they use your garden for access? If it's once a week I would be OK, if it were multiple times per day I would absolutely hate it.

The only other option would be to do as PP suggested and make part of your garden private.

There's no way to find out without asking and that might start us off on the wrong foot. As stated above while I was there they walked through and that was all of 15 mins.

OP posts:
Chimummy73 · 26/02/2025 09:28

I’d take the house but make my new neighbours aware I have a pet tarantula that likes taking daily air in the garden 😉

whatonearthisgoingonnow · 26/02/2025 09:30

RIPVPROG · 26/02/2025 09:20

I saw this on love it or list it recently, it meant they couldn't extend at the back of the house so that's worth considering too.
Not sure I'd want people just walking through the garden either, but I've got young DC

The OP isn't going to be extending a council house??

sunshineandrain82 · 26/02/2025 09:31

Where about are the gates though?
Just an idea as my parents have something like this. The gates were at the far end of the garden so they just placed a fence up with a gate to create a bit of a alleyway at the end of the garden to give them privacy

whatonearthisgoingonnow · 26/02/2025 09:31

I would go for it, the problem is that you could be waiting ages for something worse.

LivingLaVidaBabyShower · 26/02/2025 09:32

Honestly you arent buying and arent exactly going to be locked in / committed

Take the place and get frosted film for the windows... it costs about £10-20

Also put your tits away 🤣

XWKD · 26/02/2025 09:33

Think of the house itself. That's 99% of what matters -especially when you might never be offered a better house.

OneGreyBiscuit · 26/02/2025 09:34

It seems like a 50/50 split at the mo, this is very difficult. The ho said that the house next door is brought and rented out, the lady came out while we was in the garden, she seemed pleasant enough but what if they were ok but the next tenants were hellish but that can apply to every house in the world I suppose?

OP posts:
OneGreyBiscuit · 26/02/2025 09:35

sunshineandrain82 · 26/02/2025 09:31

Where about are the gates though?
Just an idea as my parents have something like this. The gates were at the far end of the garden so they just placed a fence up with a gate to create a bit of a alleyway at the end of the garden to give them privacy

The gate is attached to the house side. The idea of a privacy fence or bushes is a good one.

OP posts:
5hell · 26/02/2025 09:39

Same in our Victorian house - lived here 10+ years with no problems - neighbours only use the access for bins/bikes etc.

Only issue would be if they or you are awful neighbours ;)

xILikeJamx · 26/02/2025 09:41

SillySeal · 26/02/2025 09:13

Do you need to keep it as a gate and allow access?

There's many new builds in a row of 4 and the back is enclosed and the only way in is through the house.

I'm not sure i would feel comfortable walking through someone's garden myself anyway.

Usually with new builds they put in a path at the back of the end houses to allow external access to the middle gardens like this (yes I'm bored at work):

House dilemma (with diagram)
BarnacleBeasley · 26/02/2025 09:42

I would probably take it in the circumstances, but it's worth noting that although many houses with this type of access only use it for bins once a week, some people may use the back door as their main entrance/exit. This is more likely if the layout of the house is 2 up 2 down with the front door opening straight into the front room, and the tenants are using the front room as a bedroom. If there's a hallway at the front it's less likely.

InTheRainOnATrain · 26/02/2025 09:42

It’s really common in older terraces. It’s unlikely they’ll even use the access much beyond bin day. If it is more frequent e.g. teen taking their bike round to go to school every day you can get some frosted film for your window for around £10. If you’ve met next door and she seemed nice and you’ve been waiting since 2023 to be offered a house then I’d take it!

Chimummy73 · 26/02/2025 09:45

I guess it comes down to if you can afford to turn it down and how long you may have to wait to be offered another? As previous posters have pointed out once you’re in the system you can do a swap if you find it’s not for you, there are always people looking to do that to be closer to family/ friends etc. My partner did that himself a couple of years ago to be closer to me and it was pretty straightforward. If the house is suitable in every other way and will benefit you financially to not wait it out then grab it 🙌🏼

2chocolateoranges · 26/02/2025 09:46

I think it depends on who your neighbours are. Growing up our neighbour was an older woman who rarely used the back path but when she died it was a younger family and all their friends and it did get quite annoying with them constantly using the back garden to get to their garden, so much so when my mum was offered a swap for a smaller house she jumped at the chance to have her back garden to herself.

however if you’re desperate for a house then needs must.

sheldonRockz · 26/02/2025 09:46

xILikeJamx · 26/02/2025 09:41

Usually with new builds they put in a path at the back of the end houses to allow external access to the middle gardens like this (yes I'm bored at work):

This - ask the council if they can arrange for the neighbour’s access point to be moved to the end of the garden. Appreciate it involves two new fences and gates, but you could cite it’s for safety issues for your child/household. That way they’re not going right past your house and the risk of leaving your back gate open and access to the rear of the houses unsecured.

Probwbly need to speak to the owner of next door and possibly require change to deeds/title plans depending on what they say I.e. if neighbours point of access is marked on the title deeds etc. But that’s something for the council to worry about.

ClairDeLaLune · 26/02/2025 09:46

I would advise not being topless in your kitchen OP 😂

Kuretake · 26/02/2025 09:48

ClairDeLaLune · 26/02/2025 09:46

I would advise not being topless in your kitchen OP 😂

Not if you are cooking chips especially!

I would take it - we had this set up and it was fine. Neighbours used it quite a lot as they had bikes but it didn't bother me really.

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